SNES review | RVGFanatic

Combatribes (SNES)

**Pub & Dev: Technos | March 1993 | 12 MEGS**

We all have those special games that aren’t necessarily great but that we cherish for one reason or another. The memories forged with that game through the years stands the test of time. For me, The Combatribes is that game. The North American SNES port turned 25 years old this month. I have so many nostalgic memories of The Combatribes. I rented it 7 times spanning a period of 6 years at 5 different rental stores. Just last weekend, I beat the game for the first time in 20 years when a friend and I took to the means streets of the Big Apple. It’s still as fun today as I remember it being 25 years ago. In many ways, The Combatribes is a relic from a bygone era. A reminder of when things were simpler. They just don’t make games like this anymore. It’ll always have a special place in my gaming heart.

FLASHBACK TO DECEMBER 1992

It’s been well documented on here that Power Moves was the first import I ever rented. One Saturday in late 1992, I happened to discover a brand new rental store. GAME HUNTER. It was the stuff legends were made of. Nothing but video games. Plastered from wall to wall. Best of all, they had a section devoted entirely to imports. Back in late ’92, this was absolutely mind-blowing.

The following week, January 1993, my dad took me back to Game Hunter. This time my brother accompanied me along, something he rarely did back in those days. But I had hyped up Game Hunter so much that he wanted to see it first hand. It was on that fateful day that we came across The Combatribes. The back of the box sold me with its big colorful sprites and Double Dragon-esque atmosphere. We played it to death that weekend and loved it!

The North American version of The Combatribes landed three months later. I remember seeing it at a mom and pop store named Video Mart. Man, I loved Video Mart. It was the epitome of mom and pop shops. It was stationed in a small lot next to Target. Right across the street you could see the much bigger Hollywood Video. In fact, that picture above is my actual childhood Hollywood Video store. That means right next to that Target sign is Video Mart (sadly not pictured). Anyway, I rented The Combatribes for a second time and my brother and I still loved it.

As the years went on, I rented Combatribes five more times. Back in those days, my brother shipped me out each weekend to rent his game of choice. Half of those Combatribes rentals were on account of my brother’s request. I had a freebie the other half and somehow I always came back to it. It was my comfort food. My mac and cheese, my burger, my pizza. The Combatribes was my special little game. It never failed to put a smile on my face. After all, it’s impossible to swing a thug by his heels, taking out his delinquent buddies in the process, and NOT grin.

Honestly, I don’t know why we never bought the game, seeing as how we rented it so much. But I do remember the last time I rented The Combatribes. It was the summer of 1997. I was feeling nostalgic on this particular Saturday night as an insatiable urge to visit my old stomping grounds overtook me and refused to let go. I guess my dad was in a similar mood because that night he and I made the trek back to our old home town. For what turned out to be the last time, we entered the hallowed halls of Video Mart. The store owner has known me since I was six when I first came trampling through Video Mart in 1989. That was the infamous night where Uncle Jimmy allowed me to rent John Carpenter’s Halloween, but that’s another story for another day.

Thanks, Video Mart and one crazy cool uncle :P — Thanks Video Mart and one crazy cool uncle

The store owner dropped everything he was doing when he saw me walking through his door once more. He looked like he just saw a ghost. And for all intents and purposes, to him perhaps I was. My family moved in early 1996 and it’d been a year and a half since I last visited. He asked me where I’d been. It was like catching up with a long lost uncle you hadn’t seen in ages. Ah, the Video Mart man. And suddenly, all was right again in my innocent young world.

He held the latest for me. He was the greatest

He used to hold a lot of video tapes for me back in the early-mid ’90s. Many nights he’d make a house call. Whether it was for the latest WWF extravaganza or a horror movie, I could count on him to supply me with what I needed. For some reason, I vividly remember a house call he made in 1994. “Hi Steve, Leprechaun 2 just came back in. It’s here on hold waiting for you.” It’s so strange that I remember that phone call conversation to this day, nearly 25 years later.

As I stood there that night, I could hear his accent ringing in my head again. Of course, he was speaking to me in the flesh then and there, y’see.

“Wow! Where have you been?”

Before I could answer, DING DING. I glanced over my shoulder and saw my dad stepping in the small dimly lit store. The two of them greeted as though they were long lost friends. We caught up for a while before I made my way to the corner where all the wrestling and horror tapes sat. Right beside that was a small wooden shelf adorned by about two dozen SNES boxes. It was July 1997 and he was still only renting out SNES games. No PlayStation, no Nintendo 64 or even Saturn. God Bless Video Mart. A flood of memories swept over me like a star streaking through the night sky as I gazed at the 24 or so SNES boxes. My eyes caught sight of The Combatribes. Oh my gosh… this was the same copy I rented over four years ago back in 1993. Sentimental value overtook me as I figured I would give it one last hurrah.

Saving the Big Apple one last time.. — Saving the Big Apple one last time…

My brother couldn’t believe I came home that night with The Combatribes in tow. After all, it was ’97 and we had pretty much made the jump over to the PlayStation and N64. But for that one magical weekend, we turned back the clock. We beat the game three times before my dad and I headed back the very next night to return it. The Video Mart man greeted me with a huge grin and wished me the best of luck in high school. He also told me to please come back and visit. I said I would…

But sadly I never did.

High school happened. Life happened.

When I finally stopped by again in the late ’90s, Video Mart was gone. It was a sad day for me, and it made me wish that I’d visited earlier and kept my word. It’s a sad ending but I’ll never forget all the memories Video Mart gave me. Wherever that family may be today, I hope that life is treating them well.

Whenever I play this, I can't help but think of Video Mart — *Whenever I play this,* *I can’t help but think* *of Video* *Mart*

NO COMBATRIBES DIATRIBE HERE

This marks my third and final review for The Combatribes. I submitted my first review of it to some random gaming site back in 1999. I wrote my second review for The Combatribes on March 30, 2007. Today — March 30, 2018 — marks 11 years since I wrote that review. This is as much a review as it is a loving look back on my nostalgic memories of the game.

My summary of Combatribes in an SNES book — The “RF” is short for RVG Fanatic

My buddy Jeffrey Wittenhagen recently published a massive Super Nintendo book summarizing all 700+ North American SNES games. Several retro gamers contributed to the project; I was honored and lucky to be one of them. I wrote about nine game, including EarthBound and The Combatribes.

BEST ADVERTISING EVER

Oh God no! I'm not talking about THIS ad! — Oh God no! I’m not talking about THIS ad!

Oh definitely not! Look at poor Bullova there looking like f*cking Teen Wolf! They even switched his colors with Blitz’s. Speaking of Blitz, he looks like a Native American zombie! His in-game model does not look like that at all. The arcade version didn’t have such a hot ad but the SNES version definitely did.

Now if that isn’t the best SNES ad ever, I don’t know what is! 25 years later and I still remember it word for word. That closing remark is downright Schwarzeneggerian – “CYBORGS AIN’T LADIES!!” That’s just f*cking gold.

I liked the two in-game shots they chose, too. The blurbs were vintage early ’90s. I remember wanting to “blast the blazin’ Slash Skaters under the strobe lights of the Lexington Disco.” There was even a 1-on-1 VS. mode that tried to capitalize on the whole Street Fighter II rage. The mode wasn’t really good but hey, home bonuses!

THE STORY GOES…

I love how New York City is deemed “the center of all evil in the United States.” Good one, Technos…

Blitz: Sup with you, Bullova? — Blitz: *What’s up with you, Bullova*?

Berk: Oh boy. Its gonna be a long night... — Berzerker: *Oh boy. I see it’s gonna be a long night…*

THE COMBATRIBES

Power: ** Speed: ** — Power: **
Speed: **

I’m not sure why they changed the spelling of his name from Berserker in the arcade to Berzerker (maybe they were trying to go for that “cool” early ’90s ‘tude thing), but as you might guess, Berk is the all-around fighter of the group. He’s got decent power and speed. His swing has two revolutions.

Ah, Bullova. He was my guy from DAY ONE. The powerhouse of the group, Bullova can sustain the most damage of the trio. Slower than a snail but stronger than an ox, his swing sees a whopping four revolutions.

Not surprisingly, Blitz (as in Blitzkrieg) is the fastest of the group, but also the weakest. He incurs the most damage of the three but he’s quick enough to evade the carnage in some cases. Because he’s the weakest, his swing only gets one revolution. Poor guy.

And there’s the arcade shot. Not sure why they changed the height and weight, but the arcade version is super questionable. Berserker is 7 foot tall but only 176 pounds? Who is he — Manute Bol?!

THE MOVES OF DOOM

What resonated with me so much 25 years ago was all the killer moves you could do to inflict pain and punishment on the bad guys. My favorite one was the giant swing. Grab a thug by his heels and spin him round, knocking out anyone caught in his path of whirling destruction. It was brilliant and made me think, “Why hasn’t a beat ‘em up done this before?!”

Gather round now... — Gather ’round now…

Sadly censored but them the breaks — Sadly censored but not that big a deal

As satisfying as it is disturbing... — As satisfying as it is disturbing…

Again sadly censored but them the breaks

SAVING THE BIG APPLE

Bullova, meet the Motorcycle Nuclear Warheads. Warheads, meet Bullova’s fist.

Bullova, ever the well-rounded Samaritan and not one to discriminate, shows off his lethal kicks as well.

Warheads are led by a fat slob that goes by the name of Fats. How appropriate! Before the big battle, he tells you he’ll give you a taste of his “lumber.” Hmm, just another typical night in the Big Apple, eh? Shouldn’t have wore that lipstick, Bullova…

Swinging a bad guy makes you invincible for the duration of your swing. It comes in real handy! I love Fats’ lumber — wait whoa! That didn’t come out right. But look at the amazing amount of detail on that sucker. I guess that’s what 12 MEGS of hot arcade action will get ‘cha back in good old 1993. Keep whacking his lumber [Er… -Ed.] and eventually Fats will lose his meal ticket.

Whatever you do, don’t try to throw Fats. He’s too big and will shove you hard to the canvas. Great attention to detail by Technos!

Speaking of attention to detail, look at the pain etched on Fats’ face as Bullova sends his fat ass flying to the ground. The SNES version added in some basic cutscenes between levels where the defeated boss offers some tips to our victorious heroes.

Making your way to Coney Island, you’re greeted by the Demon Clowns. The clowns are agile and somersault to safety if you attempt to throw them. Some even come drifting down from the sky on balloons. Gotta love that! But yeah, if you see Pennywise and the Joker, you’re not alone.

Technos with some major balls. First the Joker and now Karnov! Salamander is a big bad dude who carries a torch. He breathes fire and would be a hell of a smash hit at your local summer barbecue.

Remember Karnov from the arcade and later the NES? Damn, Technos…

Salamander will lose his torch after enough damage is inflicted. Watch out for his tricky leg kick when he’s down on the ground.

Bullova defeats Karnov, I mean, Salamander, and the dude squeals. I hope you like disco, because that’s where we’re headed!

LEXINGTON KING, HERE WE COME! Greet the Slash Skate Screamers with a meaty fist to the face. Swing them round and round over the flashing disco lights. Make it a night they’ll never forget… or remember…

“GIMME, GIMME, GIMMIE A MAN AFTER MIDNIGHT! Won’t somebody help me chase the shadows away?“ I can almost hear ABBA’s classic 1979 disco song blaring in my head as I dish out justice and show these bozos what a real Saturday night in New York looks like!

Appropriately named Trash, this guy is a handful. He always takes me a continue or two to beat.

Swinging the skaters offers you temporary protection. After a long and grueling war, Trash clues you in to the next turf. Who’s up for a little baseball?

Nothing completes a quality beat ‘em up quite like a bad guy with a Mohawk. But don’t get caught up admiring it for long, unless you like being stabbed!

Throwing a bad guy into his buddies never fails to satisfy. The same can be said for a well placed uppercut that sends a bald mofo sailing in the air.

Windwalker carries a vicious Tomahawk, and he isn’t afraid to use it.

Bullova fights valiantly, but Windwalker’s Tomahawk proves to be too much.

Bodyslamming bald bastards may be a riot but it can leave you wide open for a vicious shoulder tackle. Luckily, Bullova gets the last laugh. Is there anything better in a beat ‘em up than clearing a stage with barely any health remaining?!

Windwalker is oddly admirable. Before the fight he promises to reveal everything you need to know should you be successful in defeating him, which he claims no one has done before. After losing to our heroes, Windwalker honors his word. See? There’s a decent soul underneath all that war paint and savagery.

Ground Zero Headquarters is at 1991 GZ Avenue, eh? How creative. Speaking of creative (or not), The Combatribes does what many beat ‘em ups from that era did… a boss rush on the final stage! Normally, I’m not a fan of the boss rush, but it’s actually not too bad here thanks to the fact that your health bar is refilled after each boss.

Shouldn’t you have learned your lesson last time, Fats? [I could ask you the same, Bullova… -Ed.]. Touche!

Elevator scenes are a classic staple in beat ‘em ups, but for me The Combatribes by far did it best! Double noggin knocker FTW!

There’s just too much subtle black humor in this game. I love it!

Karnov, I mean, Salamander… is back for more. He’s not so hot without his torch. Sorry…

Beware Trash’s gimpy leg attack. But if you position yourself correctly, you can safely squash the punk bastard!

Windwalker, I thought we were good, yo?! Nevermind, I take back what I said about you earlier being honorable and decent. DIIIIIIE!!!!! Hey, one of us has to, and it ain’t gonna be me! I got better things to do tonight than die.

Finally we make it to the top floor. You’re greeted by gun-toting enforcers. Lucky you! Fortunately, their long bodies are great for swinging and taking out their buddies.

Unfortunately, they’ll snipe yo ass if you let them.

Swinging protects you from even bullets. Whew! No time to admire the gorgeous night view — Bullova is too busy serving knuckle sandwiches!

Before you can exit to the rooftop, M. Bison, I mean, M. Blaster comes after you like the friggin’ T-1000 from Terminator 2: Judgment Day.

Enforcers prove to be real pesky. If they’re not busy nailing you with the butt of their rifles, they be sniping yo ass!

Bullova is so strong that simply running into bad guys will knock them over! No punch required, although it certainly adds to the fun. But just when you think you got things in order, M. Blaster reveals a f*cking gun from his chest. Who does he think he is — MechaGodzilla?!

There’s no loyalty left in this world. Martha Splatterhead, we comin’ for you!

Martha is a bitch. It takes me at least two continues to beat her, if not three or four. On an interesting side note, the name Martha Splatterhead was taken from an ’80s punk band, The Accüsed, who had a zombie mascot by the same moniker. Technos with the shout out!

Splatterhead is lightning quick. She’s got that M. Bison psycho power shit going for her. You feel quite lucky when you do manage to get your licks in.

Technos back in those days had an affinity for making the final blow happen in slow mo. It makes delivering that last attack so damn satisfying.

Martha reveals she can’t control herself and that you were the only one who could put an end to her terrible reign. It’s actually quite sad. I even felt a little sympathetic for her. She was a cyborg programmed for evil. She couldn’t help herself, even if she wanted to. I always felt this made her stand out from the typical “I want to rule the world!” type of final boss we would see in similar games from that era.

There’s a strange mix of melancholy and triumph in the closing shots. Martha Splatterhead was once a part of The Combatribes unit, but went rogue. Still, there will always be that inexplicable bond shared between the four of them. Thus, the boys set out to give Martha a proper burial. It’s interesting to note that in the arcade, Martha Splatterhead has no backstory and she shows up at the end as the true big bad with no explanation. I like how the SNES home port humanized her. Well, as much as one can humanize a cyborg, anyhow!

STREET FIGHTER II — NOT REALLY

Remember the home port of Double Dragon on the NES? It contained a special home bonus: a 1-on-1 fighting game mode. It was very basic though but hey, it’s hard to complain about anything that is a bonus.

Technos does it again! At the end of each stage, a password is given. This password isn’t to skip stages, though. It’s used rather to unlock the bad guys in the 1-on-1 mode. Select from one of three stages. The first two stages contains hazards similar to the Death Matches from World Heroes. The third stage takes place in a single plane field.

Insert the code of 9207 and it gives you access to all 16 fighters! Now before you get too excited — no SNES fighting game gave you 16 characters until 1994’s Super Street Fighter II — it is pretty limited in terms of moves and overall fluid control. Still, it’s a notable home bonus and certainly a novelty that’s worth checking out at least once if not a few times. It’s definitely better than the Double Dragon one.

Curious to see who would win between Fats and Salamander? Wonder no more! This mode answers all your burning questions. I love the animation of Fats “running.”

There’s a subtle sense of black humor to this game, as seen here. Fats may appear to be safe but in actuality he’s quite screwed.

Hilarious! My brother and I used to just dick around on this mode back in the day. Like I said, it’s mostly a novelty but it can kill 10 minutes or so.

Fascinated to try one of the low-tier bums? You can! It’s interesting to note that their health starts out lower than the bosses and protagonists, and rightfully so. These fighters are pretty much useless but it quells the morbid curiosity.

Bullova channeling his inner HADOKEN! This special move is exclusive to this mode. Nice to see Technos put some effort into it.

Surrounding hazard will harm you if touched. This probably looks ho-hum now but back in early 1993 it was rather memorable and impressive.

Martha Splatterhead or M. Blaster? You can finally settle that score once and for all…

This mode makes me think of Street Combat for some reason — VS. mode reminds me of *Street Combat* for some reason

Gonzo. Now there's a word in need of a comeback! :P — **Gonzo**. Now there’s a word in need of a comeback!

ARCADE VS. SNES COMPARISON

*Big. Beefy!* Up to 3 players can play at once

Not as big. Beefy-ish — Just 2 here but that was the norm

I do like the bald bastards though! — I do like the bald bastards though

Sadly just visual props in the SNES port :( — Sadly they’re just visual props in the SNES port

Notice the store name -- Burgers and Brew — Notice the store name *Steak & Brew Burger*

Changed to Steak and Shake — Changed to *Steak & Shake*

They now have Kunio's face! — They now have Kunio’s face!

No scaffold in SNES version — No scaffold in the SNES version

It’s interesting to note, concerning the differences in stage two, that a picture was used for the SNES port in the February 1993 issue of EGM that depicted said scaffold. Whether this was a beta shot of the actual SNES port or not, we’ll never know.

The graphics suggest it's an early SNES beta and not arcade — Graphics suggest an early SNES beta and not arcade

It had funky images on the TV screens — Funky images flashed on the TV screens

And different bad guys other than the skaters — Different bad guys other than the skaters

Only skaters and no weird imagery on the TV screens

[I dont think thats how the song goes... -Ed.] — *[I don’t think that’s how the song goes… -Ed.]*

Though I much prefer SNES! — I much prefer the look of this!

Battle M. Blaster on the rooftop in the arcade — Battle M. Blaster on the rooftop

You battle him here in the SNES port — But you battle him here in the Super Nintendo port

But in the arcade version... — And you fight Martha Splatterhead on the rooftop

Theres a sixth stage! — … there’s a sixth stage ***and*** a mob boss!

Whoa, no wonder they cut him out of the SNES port... — Whoa, no wonder they cut him out of the SNES port…

Fight Splatterhead on the docks in the arcade — Splatterhead wants you all to herself!

Super Famicom version had blood — Super Famicom port had blood

American version censored — American version was censored

CHEAT CODES

On controller 2, hold X, A, and L and reset the game. Release the buttons when the title screen appears. 10 Credits

On controller 2, hold L , R and Select and reset the game. Release the buttons when the title screen appears. 30 Credits

On controller 2, hold X + Y on it, and reset the game. Release the buttons when the title screen appears. 5 Round Match in VS. Mode

Hold L, R, and Up on controller 2 then reset the game. Double your life

On controller 2, hold A + B on it, and reset the game. Release the buttons when the title screen appears. One Round Match in VS. Mode

On controller 2, hold A+B+L+R and reset the game. Release the buttons when the title screen appears. Super Difficulty Level

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

The critics were not too kind to The Combatribes. GameFan gave it ratings of 48, 56, 69 and 69%. Super Play rated it 57%. But among retro gamers on the internet it seems to have a decent fan following. It’s definitely not for everyone, but I enjoyed it a lot 25 years ago and I still do to this day.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

As you can tell from this extensive rundown of my history with The Combatribes, it has a special place in my gaming heart. While it isn’t the smoothest playing beat ‘em up on the SNES (that honor goes to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles IV: Turtles In Time), it’s an absolute blast playing this with a like-minded friend. In my experience, more fun than most other 2-player SNES beat ‘em ups. In fact, it’s a completely different experience (and animal) when playing with a buddy in tow. Double the swinging and double the smashing makes a bonafide difference. There are some beat ‘em ups that I can have fun playing alone but The Combatribes was designed for two players in mind. Yes, it’s a little clunky and rough around the edges, but there’s so much brutality and subtle black humor that I can’t help but love it. Jumping on a goon’s back before smashing his face in the canvas, or swinging him by his heels to takes out any compadres within arm’s length… this is the epitome of what it feels like to be a brooding badass! The visuals were very good for its time. Colors are bright and bold, and I swear it isn’t TOO far off from the 1990 arcade original. Even today, there’s a certain charm to the graphics. Animation is a bit suspect occasionally but the character sprites and backgrounds are all high in quality. The music can be catchy and the sound effects are rather convincing. Every crunch and smack sounds satisfying.

But as I mentioned, the gameplay has its share of blemishes. For all that it does uniquely (the giant swing being perhaps most notable), there’s a lot of genre staples sadly missing. This includes no weapons, no health refills, no jump option and a lack of throws and combos. But these are small gripes I can put up with. One flaw that many others have stated over the years is the length of the stages, or rather, the lack thereof. Each stage is more like a short area or zone. The levels don’t stretch on and on as most other beat ‘em ups do. But I rationalized this as kid as it being a legitimate turf war. Since Martha Splatterhead controls the gangs of New York, they each own a little slice of the Big Apple. They’re not rulers of entire countries. Instead, they own a very small turf. And it’s your job to invade it and take it back. In a weird way, this added a sense of “realism” to the game for me. Er, nevermind the fact that you’re playing as cyborgs beating up hordes of clones!

The small nature of the stages also added to the atmosphere. It sort of has that quaint “small town feel” going for it. Also, due to the short length of the five stages, the game can be beaten in around half an hour or so. It’s quick to pick up and play. Some beat ‘em ups can go on for 45 minutes or even close to an hour. The Combatribes is over before it wears out its welcome. Look, I understand this game isn’t for everyone, and my general sentiments about this game may be a bit baffling to some. But it’s a game I’ve cherished for 25 years now, and it’ll always be one of my personal pet favorites in spite of the fact that it’s not necessarily great. Hey, we all have those games we connect with that resonates with us that not everyone will get. The Combatribes will forever have a special place in my heart. It’s a relic from the halcyon days of gaming. It hearkens me back to an era where saving the Big Apple with a buddy made for the perfect Saturday night. And if you’re not down with that, WE GOT THREE WORDS FOR YA!!!

Graphics: 8.5
Sound: 8.5
Gameplay: 7.5
Longevity: 7

Overall: 8.0
Silver Award

Just this past weekend, my friend and I had a blast beating The Combatribes. It was my first time beating it in over 20 years

Lennus II (SNES)

***Pub: Asmik | Dev: Copya Systems| July 1996 | 32 MEGS***

Ah, sequels. You gotta love them. Well OK, if not the execution then at least the idea of what a good sequel should be. After all, no matter how bad a sequel might turn out, at least we’ll always have the original. But in some cases, the sequel is vastly superior. Lennus II is the little known sequel to Paladin’s Quest (known as Lennus in Japan). Paladin’s Quest had much potential but fell short in a few key areas. Lennus II is definitely an upgrade in many ways. It’s everything the original should have been. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not in the elite class of top flight SNES RPGs, but it more than holds its own. There’s also a charm to it being so obscure and the game itself being very weird in general. It’s got that Japanese flare to it and if you thought Paladin’s Quest was a bit off the beaten path, you haven’t seen anything yet…

THE FIRST LENNUS — PALADIN’S QUEST

My previous review was for Paladin’s Quest, the prequel to Lennus II. It is a flawed RPG but there was some merit to it. Namely the mercenary system, its unique usage of magic skills and a bizarre dystopian universe. Unfortunately, the battles were a bit plodding, the control awkward, and character development lacking. A sequel was released (in Japan only) during the summer of 1996 under the name of Lennus II. It basically takes everything intriguing about the original and improves upon it. If you liked Paladin’s Quest then you’ll likely dig the sequel. A fair warning: the following review contains a ton of (late) in-game shots. While I don’t necessarily reveal any major spoilers, you may want to finish Lennus II before reading the rest of this review. But if you don’t mind, by all means read on… ^_^

THE ADVENTURE CONTINUES

Lennus II opens up rather auspiciously. Our hero is awakened in a strange cryptic world and is being heralded by the locals as some sort of SAVIOR. Everyone is counting on you to retrieve four hidden treasures. This must be done in order to unlock the “Great Union.” Hmmm…

The question is what happens after you find all four... — The question is what happens after you find all four…

Classic RPG fetch quest fashion, innit? — Classic RPG *fetch quest* fashion, innit?

With great power comes great responsibility... — With great power comes great responsibility…

Opening those item shells makes a satisfying sound

This makes Lennus II a great pick-up-and-play RPG — This makes *Lennus II* a great pick-up-and-play RPG

It truly does. Whereas most RPGs you can only save when finding an inn or even select save points in a long dungeon, Lennus II allows you to save anywhere at any time. So you really can play this game for 15 minutes before bed and not have to worry about finding an inn. It’s not only convenient — it’s super inviting, too.

Um, I don't know how accurate the fan translation is... — Um, I don’t know *how accurate* the fan translation is…

But it sure makes for some laughs here and there! — … but it sure makes for some occasional laughs!

Once again, you can hire the mercenaries you want

Master these eight spells in order to beat the game

Proof that SIZE MATTERS! No puny dinky beds here — Proof that SIZE MATTERS! No puny, dinky beds here

*None of the bosses will win any sort of beauty contest*

The bosses are much improved for the sequel. They’re bigger, badder and much more satisfying to kill. Just seeing their sprites on the map is quite a sight to behold. Whereas I had some complaints about the boss battles from the first game, I have none here. Copya Systems definitely made up for the first game’s boss shortcomings.

You'll meet some strange wacky NPCs along the way — You’ll meet some strange wacky NPCs along the way

Part of the fun of playing RPGs is interacting with all the quirky non-playing characters. Of which Lennus II has in no short supply. The fan translation is a joy to read and made me want to push on to see what weird new NPCs I might run into next…

One treasure down. Getting closer to this "Great Union" — One treasure down. Getting closer to the *Great Union*

Um, no comment here. Moving on, then... — Looks like this couple is *making their own Great Union*

Some basic but fun sequencing sections come into play — Some basic but fun sequencing sections soon appear

Search every nook and cranny for far-out items

Who's this cryptic Zordon wannabe -- Bryan Cranston?! — *Who’s this cryptic Zordon wannabe — Bryan Cranston?!*

I love RPGs with ridiculously high HP and money stats — Love RPGs with ridiculously high HP and money stats

He's a magic spirit. Defeat him to gain his services — Defeat this magic spirit in order to gain his services

Igles is a friendly giant. Hmm, a case of deja vu... — Igles is a friendly giant. Hmm, a slight case of deja vu

The Stone Golem from Breath of Fire — The Stone Golem from *Breath of Fire*

Almost there... just one hidden treasure left to attain... — Almost there. Just one hidden treasure left to attain…

... but you knew it wouldn't come so easily, didn't cha? — … but you knew it wouldn’t come so easily!

I have a bad feeling about this... — I have a bad feeling about this…

“You did it Steve!”

“Of course. Now what?”

“Place each one in its proper slot, and see”

“You promise nothing bad will happen?”

“Oh but of course…”

Not the brightest bulb in the pack, is he?

Told you there was something fishy about this fetch quest farce. You knew the game couldn’t end after securing the four artifacts. In fact, it is only just beginning.

Gotta love how some try to convince you of their worthiness — Some try to convince you of their worth

Part of the fun lies in deciding which mercenaries to recruit. Some are better than others in certain areas. Who will you pick and invest in? Who will you let go of? Character development is still a little thin but it is better than Paladin’s Quest.

*WINCES* Don't mess with Myra — ***WINCES*** Don’t mess with Myra

Especially since she's 1337 — Especially since she’s 1337

Lennus II: The Legend of the Seven Stars, er, Seals... — *Lennus II: The Legend of the Seven Stars*, er, Seals…

After securing the four artifacts and unleashing the Great Union, it’s up to you to right your wrong by collecting seven seals. It’s not called Lennus II: The Apostles of the Seals for nothing.

No judgment here Tara. Do your thang, girl — No judgment here Tara. ***Do your thang, girl***

Some dodgy fellows there. Guess where the pee goes — *Some dodgy fellas there*. I wouldn’t pee in front of ‘em

This fan translation has its fair spot of (subtle) humor — So that’s where the urine goes. Yum…

Ah, the slums. One of the best parts of Lennus II

Lennus II contains moderate religious overtones — *Lennus II* contains moderate religious overtones

In the spring of 2013, I played the Blind Man in a major Easter musical. 10,000+ people came to watch our show over the course of two weekends. I minored in Theatre Arts in college so acting has always been something I’ve enjoyed. It was a great experience and a blast to get healed by Jesus every night. After which, I’d run around the stage screaming “I CAN SEE! I CAN SEE!” So when I came across this scene in Lennus II, you bet your ass it brought back fond memories!

There are some quirky side quests along the way

Haha is that so... WAIT WHAT?! — *laughs* Is that so… ***WAIT WHAT?!***

Lennus II was ahead of its time. It knew the future — *Lennus II* was ahead of its time. It knew the future

I don’t know about you but where I live libraries are reducing hours drastically. Book stores are rapidly becoming rare. There’s even talk that one day libraries might even cease to exist. What a shame that would be. It’s bad enough that Toys R Us are going out of business, but libraries? That better NEVER happen. I’ll be damned should that day ever come! *shakes fist* My childhood was built on library and book store visits. And I want my future children to experience the same joys I did when I was a kid.

Zaygos was the villain in Paladin's Quest. Nice callback — Zaygos was the villain in *Paladin’s Quest*. Nice callback

Some deep questions are posed... awaiting answers... — Some deep questions are posed and *await answering*

Come on, I don't want to be in Paranormal Activity 13! — Come on, I don’t want to be in Paranormal Activity 13!

I love how the translation breaks the fourth wall

It makes me chuckle when I think about how I used to blindly detest RPGs back in the ’90s. It wasn’t until 2003 that my mindset toward RPGs did a complete 180. All the credit goes to the epochal Sega Saturn Magazine (the best gaming magazine of all time in my humble opinion). SSM championed the RPG genre like no other, and their overwhelming passion quickly won me over as I read through their issues. Glad I got over my youthful ignorance. 15 years, eh? Here’s to another 15 years!

Hearkens you back to Harry Potter a bit, doesn't it? — Hearkens you back to *Harry Potter* a bit, doesn’t it?

Keep a notepad nearby to jot down critical notes

I love archiving and always recommend the like-minded to keep some sort of log. It pays to keep a record of things. And games like this are perfect for keeping a list of notes on.

Uh, I usually pay, but YOU wanna pay? OK then.... — Uh, I usually pay, but **YOU** wanna pay? OK then….

I know how he feels. I like staring at my collection too :) — I know how he feels. I like admiring my collection too

Where have I seen this before? Feels like deja vu... — Where have I seen this before? Feels like deja vu…

From Breath of Fire II. What a strange coincidence... — Ah yes, from Breath of Fire II. Eerily similar, innit?

This scene reminds me of Black Friday. One of my favorite gaming memories was Black Friday 2010. Having partaken in the fiasco the year before, I decided to ditch the festivities in 2010. Rather than shopping with my cousins and wading through the masses, I went home to begin my trek through Terranigma. A most glorious evening, to say the least

Lord Steve, eh? I can get used to that... [Please -Ed.] — Lord Steve, eh? I can get used to that…

Props to these good folks for translating this game!

Nasty bosses guard each one of the seven seals

That's true for ALL women. Did I say that out loud? :P — That’s true for *ALL* women. Did I say that out loud?

Being kind pays off. What comes around goes around — Being nice pays off. *What goes around comes around*

Give Goltork the belt to unearth another seal — Give Goltork the belt to reveal one of the seven seals

Oh Lord. Some people just never learn their lessons... — Damn, some people never learn from their mistakes…

This part conjures some painful memories

It’s a flashback to the first game’s most difficult section. This version, however, is thankfully a cakewalk. Whew.

Don't even start.... — Don’t even start…

*[Steve tends to have that charming effect on people -Ed.]*

Come on, what am I, Donald Trump?! *rimshot*

Items, experience points and a world of pain lie ahead... — Items, experience points **and** lots of pain lie ahead…

You don't want to know what's lurking behind that... — You don’t want to know what’s lurking behind that…

I love it when RPGs feature ridiculously high statistics

Another thing I appreciate about Lennus II is that stat increments across the board are shown when leveling up. Not all RPGs do this and it’s always annoying when that’s the case.

Wait, eight seals?? I thought there were only seven... — Wait, eight seals?! I thought there were only seven…

Castle of Illusion Starring Midia Mouse? Ahem, sorry... — *Castle of Illusion Starring Midia Mouse*? Ahem, sorry…

Lennus II does a splendid job of referencing back to Paladin’s Quest from time to time. It isn’t necessary to play through Paladin’s Quest first, though it doesn’t hurt if you want to know the entire backstory.

Did somebody mention Castle of Illusion... :D — Did somebody mention *Castle of Illusion*?

This racing bit adds some diversity to the proceedings — Sure, why not

I love those Rita Repulsive looking ears back there — I love those Rita Repulsa looking ears back there

Lennus II continues the unique looking visuals from the first game. But now they’re significantly improved from the 8-bit looking predecessor. Speaking of which, did you know Paladin’s Quest originally started as a Game Boy game? But due to the rising popularity of the SNES in 1992, the Game Boy vision went up in flames. Although the visuals of Lennus II aren’t up to par with some of the RPGs that came before, they get the job done. I like this part in particular. The clouds zoom by in the background at a breakneck speed, creating a nice atmospheric scene.

Steve has unlocked 1337 status [It's only a game -Ed.] — Steve has unlocked 1337 status [It’s only a game -Ed.]

More than a passing reference, Midia shows up!

Place the dragon statues over those red dots

Aww. Good ol' Midia was always the sentimental type — Awww. Good ol’ Midia — always the sentimental type

To truly discover yourself, take the path less traveled — To ***truly*** discover yourself, take the path less traveled

What lies inside? You hope it's worth the hunt and hassle! — What lies inside? You hope it’s worth the hunt…

I don’t know about you but I tend to have OCD when it comes to RPGs. I must explore every last nook and cranny so as not to miss any key items. It irks me when there are multiple routes and I happen to select the one that leads to a boss. And there goes my chance of finding any treasure! There’s nothing better than finding treasure on your first try when there are multiple routes.

Some items are stashed away in obscure locations

Shades of the Runaway Five from EarthBound! Lennus II features its own musical group and it’s up to you to locate their five missing instruments. Nothing bad happens should you fail to secure them all. It’s just a silly little side quest for the OCD gamers out there, like myself!

Kick mercenaries to the curb as you please

I love Chest's last remark. Don't hold your breath! — I love Chest’s last remark. Don’t hold your breath!

Better get in line, toots. And it's a long line [Riiight -Ed.] — Better get in line toots. *And it’s a long line* *[Riiight -Ed.]*

Movement is not as slow as it was in Paladin's Quest — Movement is not as slow as it was in *Paladin’s Quest*

I like the overworld map. Your hero looks a lot like a SD (Super Deformed) character. Later in the game you can move around the map by riding that funky looking animal there, or via airship.

Ain't that a cold slice of truth, Nel. Preach it, bro! — Ain’t that a cold slice of truth, Nel. Preach it, bro!

I love when RPGs hit close to home with comments like this. They are thought-provoking and it’s always gratifying when a game makes you ponder for a moment about life itself.

Enter the theatre and bear witness to a masterful montage of Lennus’ history. Moments like this helps to sweep you away to a far away land of awe and wonder.

Translators having a bit of fun here, me thinks

Only you know for sure why. BIG being the key word! — Only you know for sure why. ***BIG*** being the key word!

Unearth all sorts of weird items throughout your quest — Unearth all sorts of weird items during your journey

A rather touching and heartfelt moment :) — A touching and heartfelt moment. Poignant, even

More cool references to the first game abound later on — More cool callbacks to the first game appear later on

Chezni is a beloved and revered hero in Lennus — Chezni is a beloved and revered folk hero in Lennus

Yes, Chezni embarked on a quest... Paladin's Quest :P — Yes, Chezni embarked on a quest… *Paladin’s Quest*

Which path to take first? Hope you don't miss any items! — Which path to take first? My OCD is already kicking in

Don't you hate it when you get blue blobs... O_o — Damn blue blobs… always stopping a good time, eh?

This cave is pretty rough. Those annoying blue blobs follow you around like a lost puppy. You’ll have to fight them if enough flies follow. Sure they look small and weak on their own, but they’re a sight for sore eyes when they combine together to form one huge blue blob of destruction.

Love this part! Fan translation is super self-aware

You gotta play this game on the real SNES hardware :) — You gotta play this game on the real SNES hardware!

This boss guards not one but two seals. Double tough! — This boss guards not one but **two** seals. Double tough

Some battle zones, like this one, seem to drag on — Some battle zones, like this one, seem to drag a bit

One seal left! But a grumpy geezer blocks your path

Lots of diverse locales to explore, including Lennus

Can you make it to the last boss? Can you survive the finale? — Behold, the instrument of **death**. Can you save Andel?

Steve offers sage advice to comfort this lost lass

This guy is HILARIOUS! We all know one in real life... — This guy is ***HILARIOUS***. We all know one in real life…

[Whoa Steve! So much for "blue blobs"... -Ed.] — *[Whoa Steve! So much for “blue blobs”… -Ed.]*

[I guess a tiger can't change its stripes after all -Ed.] — *[I guess a tiger can’t change its stripes after all -Ed.]*

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

16 MEGS? Try doubling that. 32 MONSTER MEGS! — 16 MEGS? Try doubling that. **32 MONSTER MEGS!**

Lennus II was never officially released in North America due to the simple fact that Paladin’s Quest didn’t exactly set the SNES world on fire. Also, the 16-bit era was all but dead by the summer of 1996. An English translation would have pushed a potential release date into late ’96 and there was no chance in hell of that even being considered. Lennus II is fairly obscure and not often talked about. After scouring the net for information on this game, I can count the total number of Lennus II reviews on one hand. But here are some of the comments I managed to dig up: “Truly fantastic” and “One of the best sequels ever.” While I wouldn’t go so far, Lennus II is definitely a solid and worthy sequel.

Classic ol' Super Play — Credit Yousuke Kato and Keisuke Goto for the design

CLOSING THOUGHTS

Superior to its predecessor, Lennus II is a solid sequel — Superior to its predecessor, *Lennus II* is a solid sequel

Lennus II is a sensible example of how to do a sequel right. The first game had potential but ultimately fell short in several categories. The sequel improves on every aspect while continuing the storyline and unique artistic style of Paladin’s Quest. It’s just simply a competent RPG in every respect. It doesn’t do any one thing in particular to knock your socks off, but it does it all in a quietly satisfying manner. Visually, it’s much improved over the first game. That’s to be expected though since Lennus II came out nearly four years following Paladin’s Quest. If you compare Lennus II to other SNES RPGs that came out around the same time or even a little before, it is admittedly a bit visually lacking by comparison. But it still gets the job done. The music is pretty good. It’s very ambient, which helps to set a striking mood. Most importantly though, the game plays much better than the first one did. It flows better than Paladin’s Quest. Movement is a lot smoother as are the battles. Those were two parts that hampered the first game big time. Thankfully, Copya Systems got it right second time around.

You'll be greeted by some fascinatingly bizarre sights! — You’ll be greeted by some *fascinatingly bizarre* sights!

So what stops Lennus II from being great? Similar to the first game, the characters never feel fully fleshed out. The mercenaries come and go, some with very minimal development. Also, as with the first one, I felt the last third of the game started to dragged a bit. It took me 46 and a half hours to beat. I definitely took my sweet time, but it’s on the longer side when talking about RPG length from that era. On the bright side, the translation is entertaining as hell and there are plenty of fun NPCs to interact with. In addition, there’s the occasional side quest thrown into the mix to keep things relatively fresh, like building your own house. This was 20+ years before The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild did it — in your face, Link! There are some truly memorable moments to witness such as Jubal’s sordid fate. I loved all the references to Paladin’s Quest, especially anything involving Midia. I had fun collecting all the various spells and building them up in strength. When you beat the game and finally save Andel, you’re treated to a nice long 15 minute ending. You travel the world of Andel to catch up with several characters you’ve met along the way. These interactions run the gamut, ranging from silly and amusing to thought-provoking and poignant. It’s easily one of the best endings I’ve ever seen in a Super Nintendo game. Lennus II is a fun, simple and quirky RPG that does most things competently but not any one thing really well. If you’re an RPG buff (especially of the 16-bit era), Lennus II is worthy of a playthrough.

Graphics: 7.5
Sound: 7.5
Gameplay: 7.5
Longevity: 7.5

Overall: 7.5
Bronze Award

Love the game's unique style — Nope, definitely not a cult or anything…

Lennus II is full of religious overtones. Also expect the following: big ugly bosses, magic spells galore, sacrifices, deceit, exploitation and dear old friends, among others. Not to mention the brilliant feature of being able to save your game at ANY point at ANY time. This means you won’t need to locate a blasted inn or statue to save. You can even save anywhere inside a dungeon for goodness sake! You’re in control of how long you play rather than being “held hostage” to locate the next save point. The save anywhere anytime system will spoil your ass as much as it will make you wish every other RPG did it too. In an ever increasing world of adult duties and less time to game, it’s really cool because you can play Lennus II in small 15 minute chunks each night before going to bed. So strap on your healing boots and explore the bizarre dystopian world of Andel… if you dare.

Now THAT'S the good life! :D — Now **THAT’S** the good life!

Paladin’s Quest (SNES)

**Pub: Enix | Dev: Copya Systems | October 1993 | 12 MEGS**

Known in Japan as Lennus: Kodai Kikai no Kioku (subtitle translated to Memories of an Ancient Machine), Lennus was first released in the Land of the Rising Sun on November 13, 1992. It was one of the earliest RPGs on the SNES. Nearly a year later, Enix picked it up for distribution throughout North America in November of 1993. The title was changed to Paladin’s Quest. This is, at the very least, a rather quirky and interesting game. While never thought of as one of the Super Nintendo’s finest, Paladin’s Quest isn’t without some merit if you can overlook some of its flaws. Truth be told, I didn’t give a damn about the RPG genre as a kid. However, I was always fascinated by the lesser touted titles. I remember seeing the ad for Paladin’s Quest during the holiday season of 1993 and being semi-curious about it despite the fact that I didn’t care for RPGs back then.

My taste in gaming thankfully matured over the years as the RPG genre became one of my favorites. One of the best things about this hobby as an adult is the ability to quell longstanding childhood curiosities. Five years ago in 2013, that’s exactly what happened for me with Paladin’s Quest.

PARTY LIKE IT’S 1994

Best part of this might be the SUPNES abbreviation! — Best part of this might be the **SUPNES** abbreviation!

I first bought Paladin’s Quest (cart only) on February 13, 2006. I bought a second copy complete in box with instruction manual and map charts in 2010. It was cheap enough ($22.48) and I was trying to complete my boxed SNES collection. What a lovely surprise when I realized the game was being passed down to me from its original owner, receipt and all! So many thoughts raced through my mind as the receipt fell out of the box upon arrival. He bought it right after lunch on January 1, 1994. Paladin’s Quest was released about three months prior. Did he want it for Christmas? Did he have to save up in order to buy it? Did his parents buy it for him? How old was he? In my head I picture a hardcore RPG nut power walking to Babbage’s after eating a Big Mac combo meal at the food court, determined to purchase Paladin’s Quest on the first day of the new year. On second thought, he probably didn’t eat at McDonald’s. Look at him busting out a crisp Benjamin Franklin on the spot like a big baller. Yup, he definitely had Black Angus for lunch.

One of the coolest things about RPGs back then was that many came packaged with all sorts of neat maps and charts. Paladin’s Quest had some nifty ones as you can see here.

Sure there were many palette swaps but it was still an impressive roster of monsters.

Some of the abbreviations were annoying but having this chart certainly helped.

He paid $67.59 in 1994 and I paid $22.48 in 2010. A differential of $45.11. Such is the life and fate of old video games.

PALADIN’S QUEST BEGINS

The game opens up with a little peer pressure

Our hero succumbs to pressure and chaos ensues

Be ready for loads of cut off letters and abbreviations

Paladin's Quest is extremely methodical to a fault — *Paladin’s Quest* is extremely methodical to a fault

Battles with six or more bad guys can get a little drawn out to say the least. You’ll need a healthy dose of patience to plow through this game.

The battle menu is pretty cool. Select commands simply by pressing the D-Pad.

Let’s say you click on weapon. This opens up a variety of options, from attacking to healing. Theoretically, you could play with one hand. The other hand you can use to… well, nevermind.

The good duke, er… Duke, follows you up the Tower of Gabnid. If only you knew beforehand what you’re about to discover…

Truth or Dare, a supernatural horror movie, hits movie theatres next month (April 2018). As you can surmise from the title, it’s about lies and dares that go terribly wrong. You ever had a dare go REALLY wrong before? Well, our hero is about to experience just that!

You just activated DAL GREN: Destroyer of Worlds. Good job, Steve.

There’s nothing you can do as Dal Gren automatically punishes you.

Despair. Destruction. Desolation. Doomed. Damn — Despair. Destruction. Desolation. **Doomed**. ***DAMN***

One little dare gone wrong and you’re partially responsible for having wiped out your own land. Talk about a rough day.

Sad but true. The hero moves at a snail-like pace with no run option in sight. It’s enough to possibly turn away potential players for good. I wasn’t kidding when I called Paladin’s Quest a more methodical RPG than the norm.

See that liquor bottle sign there? That signals the local tavern. It is here that you can recruit mercenaries for hire. There are many different mercenaries as you traverse the game. Upgrading and managing your allies is part of the key to success. Keep in mind that some allies are not always what they seem…

Look up their stats and abilities prior to plopping down the cash. Choose and manage your allies wisely. Thankfully, you can freely swap them out as you please. Well, most of them anyhow…

It’s standard RPG fare. You know what you’re getting. Despite Paladin’s Quest being slow as hell, it has its moments too.

What did I say about feeding 'em after midnight? — What did I say about feeding them after midnight?!

Ah, Gremlins. Loved that movie back in the ’80s. There’s three of them here but they’re not too difficult. Dispose of them quickly and leave before the house burns to a crisp.

“Hey, how about we crash this place?”

“Looks like a shady part of town to me…”

*GROWL*

“Did you hear that?! That wasn’t my stomach…”

“Don’t be such a pussy cat! Let’s set up camp here.”

“I guess beggars can’t be choosers but… f*ck my life.”

With fairly being the operative word here. Random enemy encounters. They play such a notable role, pardon the pun, in role playing games. Have too many battles and you risk suffocating the player. Have too few and the player waltz through. In the case of Paladin’s Quest, the random enemy encounter varies greatly. Sometimes it feels like you can walk a decent distance without a random battle. But other times it seems like you can’t take four steps without a group of enemies attacking you. This can make collecting “way out there” items a pain in the ass.

Alornso is no cake walk. You’ll need to make every battle turn count, especially since your party is sitting at only two members up to this point.

Be sure to develop your hero’s spells. Unlike most other RPGs where leveling up means your magic ability increases, here in Paladin’s Quest you can only level up your spells BY USING THEM. There is no MP count. Using spells takes points away from your HP. It may feel funky at first but to me at least it soon became second nature.

Everyone's a critic — Everyone’s a critic

Gotta love that Midia. She’s the type to go to the ends of the earth for ya.

Paladin’s Quest possesses a certain weird quirky atmosphere, thanks in no small part to its abundant strange looking towns and villages. Although the visuals are somewhat lackluster, the creativity behind them isn’t completely lost. The pastel-like colors has a way of transporting you into a fascinatingly odd world that’s reminiscent of a bizarre nightmarish dream after eating a leftover five-layered burrito a few days past its expiration date.

It’s always a thrill clicking on shelves and cabinets and then hearing the sound effect that plays whenever an item is discovered. Love that feeling (and sound)!

The added points are random. It’s always nice when you come out on the higher end like Steve does here, adding four points to his total.

I hope you're not afraid of heights... — I hope you’re not afraid of heights…

Ominous unsettling scenes are the order of the day

What, me, cynical? Never... — What, me, cynical? Never…

The most annoying and infuriating part. GAH! — The most annoying and infuriating part. ***GAH!***

This must have drove everyone who played this game back in the ’90s crazy. Nowadays we have YouTube to show us the way. Some may call it “cheating” but just try solving this for 10 minutes before you too inevitably say “Man, f*ck this shit.” Some puzzles just aren’t worth the pain of trying to figure out on your own. Life is too short. When you get to this part, just remember my words…

THE SEQUEL TO PALADIN’S QUEST: LENNUS II

Did you know that Paladin’s Quest saw a sequel on the SNES? It only came out in Japan, though. Lennus II was released on July 26, 1996. Thanks to the efforts of hardcore translators, those who can’t read Japanese can now enjoy and play through “lost games” such as Lennus II. I went through Lennus II after beating Paladin’s Quest, and I’m happy to say that it improves upon the original in pretty much every way. It’s no Chrono Trigger but hey, what is? RPG lovers will enjoy Lennus II. It even makes several references back to the first game. For example, take a look at the picture above that mentions Midia. It isn’t necessary to beat Paladin’s Quest first but it helps since that will give you the complete backstory. However, some may find Paladin’s Quest too off-putting, so you might want to skip straight to Lennus II if that’s the case. Lennus II won’t rock your world but it’s not a bad way to spend a couple weeks with.

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

I’ve always been a fan of the box art which does a stellar job of conveying a magical adventure in the making. Unfortunately, the game itself isn’t quite so magical. And the critics of the time agreed. The game received mostly middling scores. EGM gave it ratings of 5, 6, 6, 8 and 8. Super Play rated it 62%. GameFan completely overlooked it, which suggests that they didn’t think much of it. Otherwise, they would have been thrilled to promote and champion Paladin’s Quest. You know it’s a bad sign when GameFan (who handed out high scores like they were free condiments going out of style) completely ignores covering a game back in those days.

... is for diehard SNES RPG warriors only — … is for diehard SNES RPG warriors only

Not only does it have a cool cover but it also has one of the best looking SNES title plates you’ll ever see. Well, at least it has that going for it, eh?

CLOSING THOUGHTS

The SNES is blessed with an amazing library. In particular, the RPG genre is well represented. Some of the very best of all time resides on the Super Nintendo. As someone who fell in love with the genre moreso as a young adult, I’m experiencing gaming redemption left and right. Playing through the likes of Secret of Mana 2, Tales of Phantasia, Terranigma and Treasure Hunter G has been an absolute blast. I’ve been on a quest since 2006 to play through all of the Super Nintendo RPGs that I own. Paladin’s Quest is one that has always intrigued me, even back in 1993 when I didn’t care for the genre. Its off-the-beaten path vibe and unique art style made me hopeful that it might turn out to be something of a sleeper hit. After investing over 30 hours during the span of three and a half weeks, I can safely say that Paladin’s Quest resides somewhere in the middle of the SNES RPG pack. It’s by no means great but it’s not without some merit, either.

Let’s start with the good. The first thing that jumps out is no doubt the pastel-like visuals. It’s not for everyone but I personally dug it. It helps to give the game a rather distinct style. There aren’t many RPGs with the kind of look that Paladin’s Quest employs. Secondly, there’s the unique mercenary system where you can recruit allies to aid you in battle. It gives the game some strategy and even serves as sort of an in-game difficulty buffer. Looking for a tougher challenge? Then pay off the weaker fighters to join your crew. Looking for the least path of resistance? Then select the most ruthless and powerful assassins. Variety is the spice of life. It’s a double-edged sword, though. Because you can add to and subtract your party members as you go, there’s never much of a cohesive “team story” here as you’d see in most other RPGs, but having fresh characters come and go keeps you on your toes.

However, the story does mainly circulate around Chezni (or Steve or whatever name you decide to give the main hero). Therefore, I never felt robbed of a team story as this is Chezni’s quest. The back of the box spells it out for you pretty clearly so at least there is no false advertising. Besides, there are hundreds of RPGs that follow the traditional typecasting of RPG party members. So at the very least, Paladin’s Quest offers something a little different with its notable mercenary system. Yes, the mercenaries are underdeveloped and thus come off feeling a little soulless, but if you really think about it, that’s a mercenary to a tee. It’s all just a matter of perspective!

Now that the positives have been highlighted, let’s look at the negatives. Chezni moves like he just shitted in his pants. With no run option to offset this, this is a very slow moving RPG. To further accentuate that, battles tend to drag especially when dealing with up to eight (!) enemies at a time. Bosses are disappointingly weak. Random enemy encounters can linger on unbearable at times. The battle system is a bit awkwardly constructed. There are some pretty good tracks but the music isn’t all that memorable. What you’re left with then is a decent RPG. Paladin’s Quest does have its share of ardent fans so who knows, you might end up being in that camp. But for me, it was just alright. The first half was definitely the most enjoyable while the second half began to drag a bit too much. There’s groundwork for a solid RPG here but the execution left something to be desired. Paladin’s Quest isn’t unplayable but you can certainly find better ways to spend 25-30 hours on your SNES than this. The Super Famicom only sequel, Lennus II, is a far better and more satisfying effort. Try that one if you can!

Graphics: 6
Sound: 7
Gameplay: 6
Longevity: 6

Overall: 6.0

Shout out to Brock and Repros for the love! — Shout out to Brock Landers and repros4lyfe for the love!

While transferring over my Paladin’s Quest review from my original website to this WordPress, I found out literally yesterday that I was given some love on the SNES Reddit when a guy posted asking about Paladin’s Quest on October 30, 2016. Brock Landers gave my site, RVGFanatic, a personal recommendation. Pretty cool stumbling across this yesterday while fixing up my original review and doing some additional research. Didn’t expect to see that Reddit post but it totally made my day. Thanks guys!

Ahhhhh yes… this classic bit of dialogue. @ repros4lyfe, those two text boxes are some of my favorites from the game too!

Super Bomberman 2 (SNES)

**Pub: Hudson | Dev: Produce | September 1994 | 8 MEGS**

Super Bomberman was one of the big SNES hits of 1993. Its 4-player free-for-all mode made it THE party game of its generation. To no one’s surprise, Hudson Soft released a sequel exactly one year later. In theory, sequels are supposed to capitalize on the success of its predecessor. It should be more fun, more polished, bigger and better. The good thing about the Bomberman games is that for the most part, there’s almost no such thing as a bad Bomberman game, especially when you’re talking about pre-N64 entries. After all, it’s hard to screw up the classic formula of four friends duking it out for bombing supremacy. It’s kind of like pizza — even a mediocre pie is more than edible and it’s even better when enjoyed with a couple friends. So it’s not a question of if Super Bomberman 2 is any good but rather is it better than the classic original? Let’s see…

BOOM GOES THE DYNAMITE

Super Bomberman was considered by many as the ultimate party game back in the day. The sequel had a lot to live up to.

The Normal Mode now scrolls multiple screens as opposed to the first game’s single screen affair. However, in a head-scratching decision, the 2-player co-op option was mysteriously dropped.

But as we all know, most people don’t play Bomberman for the Normal Mode. No, people play for the Battle Mode! Add three friends to the mix and a good time is sure to be had by all.

Brand new to the sequel is the tag team mode. This is especially handy for when you have two skilled players and two casual players. It’s also good for when it’s just you and the girlfriend or wife. My girlfriend and I enjoy this mode as it allows us to play co-op against two computer opponents ~~rather than me always kicking her butt.~~

Speaking of new, each of the Bombermen now have their own colored bombs. Now you’ll always know exactly who killed you. This allows for vows of vengeance and clear cut rivalries to develop. It’s a nice touch.

ICONS GALORE

Some icons have been added.

Another look…

And here’s a more in-depth look.

The Power Glove works a little differently from the Boxing Glove. In the first game, you could only punch bombs. But now you can carry bombs and toss them as you please. I like the Power Glove’s added versatility.

Ah, the classic good old skates. My girlfriend thought it was a car at first.

WHEEL OF FORTUNE

New to this sequel is the G-Bomber option. When activated, the winner plays roulette at the end of a match. Whichever item procured is then granted to the winner for the next match. Not all items are beneficial. The Geta (Japanese sandals) will slow you down big time. The winner also adopts a golden hue. This makes the reigning champion an easy target as temporary alliances are quick to form!

BATTLE ZONES

It’s not a proper Bomberman game without the classic basic stage. Battle Zone 1 ensures a pure and fair fight. The gimmicks start rolling with Battle Zone 2 where players struggle to maintain their footing as they slide all over the slippery ice. Hitch a ride through one of the underground tunnels to escape the heat of battle… but beware that you don’t land right in the middle of an explosion!

Battle Zone 3 is unique because it’s the one stage where you can actually push the competition. Normally you can just pass through one another like you’re ghosts. But not so here. It’s fun because you can impede your opponent’s progress and set them up for an explosive finish. This stage in particular is best experienced in the tag team mode. Hell, there are even four different exit points thrown in for good measure. Battle Zone 4 has a neat gimmick where explosions touching the belt causes the entire belt to ignite. You definitely don’t want to be standing there when it does!

What would a Bomberman game be without some sort of tunnel stage? Super Bomberman has one of my favorite tunnel stages in the franchise. Unfortunately, I can’t say the same for Super Bomberman 2. The roofs occasionally pop open to reveal the playing area. I’m not a fan of that. To me that just kind of ruins the whole gimmick. I’m also not a fan of the aesthetic of Battle Zone 5. It looks rather drab especially when compared to the first game’s classic colorful pipes and blue blocks.

Battle Zone 6 contains four warp points. It’s a decent map but not one of my favorites. Battle Zone 7 incorporates a speed (or lack thereof) gimmick.

Much like the tunnel stage, it wouldn’t be a proper Bomberman title without some sort of conveyor belt and arrow gimmick. Bombs laid on the conveyor belt in Battle Zone 8 bob along until they explode. The arrows in Battle Zone 9 dictate the direction in which kicked bombs travel.

A peculiar stage, this one. Mushrooms are only temporarily destroyed before resurrecting. You can also freely hop around, which is exclusive to Battle Zone 10. Be careful you don’t land on a flame!

There are two secret stages in this game. The first is a wrestling ring where players are pretty much maxed out from the start. Bounce off the ropes for two seconds of invulnerability.

Use the trampolines but beware of the land mines!

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

GameFan gave it ratings of 72, 76 and 78%. It should be noted that these ratings were based during a funky period where GameFan switched its rating system from 100 points total to 50 instead, and rather than giving the game an overall score, they simply tallied up the scores in their five categories (graphics, music, control, play mechanics and originality). Well, a game like this won’t (and didn’t) score well in graphics so that hurt its final score. The ratings look low but I know if GameFan had done their original style of rating games, Super Bomberman 2 would easily have scored in the 90s.

GameFan's crappy new ratings system — GameFan’s crappy new ratings system

Sometimes a game’s whole is greater than the sum of the parts. Super Bomberman 2 is a shining example of this but such a ratings scale as above will not reflect that properly.

Thank God they went back to this a few months later — Gotta love this rating style as well as *Demon’s Crest*

There’s an old saying that rings true in this case: if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. GameFan’s old ratings system was based on a 100 point scale. The final score was based on the reviewer’s overall opinion rather than simply tallying up the total in the five rated categories. While their reviews were never known for a large amount of text, at least there was some meat on the bones.

Ugh — This, on the other hand, had no meat

I hated this new ratings system and was happy they killed it after two issues. EGM had the 10 point rating scale and GameFan had the 100 point scale. It was perfect that way. The 50 scale and adding up the individual scores was downright lazy and not indicative of a game’s true ranking. There’s also hardly any text to describe why a game received the score that it did.

Super Play rated it 91% and ranked it #49 on their Top 100 Best SNES Games list. For the record, they listed Super Bomberman 3 at #39 and the original Super Bomberman #22.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

Super Bomberman 2 is a worthy sequel indeed. Although I enjoy its predecessor that much more, I do have some fond memories with this one (albeit not as much as I have with the first game). My fondest memory dates back to Christmas of 2010. My cousins from Texas flew over for the holidays and I busted out my newly bought PowerPak. That night my cousins and I played Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles IV: Turtles in Time and Super Bomberman 2 like there was no tomorrow. It was a really good time and playing those old games with my family brought back a lot of nostalgic memories of playing those two games way back in the day. Good times.

I like that the sequel introduced colored flames to let you know who killed you. This always made the following round that much more intense when you know without a shadow of a doubt who got you. The tag team mode is a solid added feature as it brings about a different dynamic. The Boxing Glove is now the Power Glove, which allows you to hold and carry bombs (much improved upon the old punching one). Hell, they even improved the story mode — it now features a scrolling screen rather than a single screen. Although sadly, they now made that mode a one player affair. However, it’s all about the Battle Zones. There are some quality maps here but some of that magic from the first game is missing a bit here. It’s still a great game and a whole lot of fun but it’s just not as charming or fun to play as the first game was. I prefer the Battle Zones and atmosphere of the original. So while there are notable improvements made in a few areas, there’s just something about that IT factor that Super Bomberman possessed in spades that Super Bomberman 2 doesn’t have as much of. Still one hell of a sequel though and a game I won’t ever turn down to play with three other friends.

Graphics: 7
Sound: 7
Gameplay: 9
Longevity: 9

Overall: 9.0
Gold Award

Super Bomberman (SNES)

***Pub: Hudson Soft | Dev: Produce | September 1993 | 4 MEGS***

One of my favorite Super Nintendo games of all time is Super Bomberman. It’s been nearly 25 years since it came out. Hard to believe it was almost a quarter of a century ago that my friends and I would lock ourselves in a room to play this game on countless Saturday nights in Sacramento. GAWD DAMN. Super Bomberman was a revolutionary title. It was the first 4-player SNES game I can remember playing. Super Bomberman in my eyes at least forever changed the landscape of multiplayer gaming. Speaking of which, here’s a cheap plug to an article I wrote about notable SNES party games…

A BLAST FROM THE PAST

Growing up, I was lucky enough to have a local best friend, Nelson, in addition to having a tight-knit band of brothers and sisters who lived two hours away. The birth of this connection all started during the Vietnam War. That’s where our dads met on the battlefield. Thankfully, they all survived and then continued their bond post-war. They each went on to marry, start a family and they stayed in touch through it all. Our countless family friend sleepovers during the late ’80s to mid ’90s were legendary. Staying up until 2 AM, the adults would be downstairs laughing up a storm — dancing the night away, singing cheesy karaoke songs and reminiscing about the good old days. Meanwhile, upstairs, a group of young boys and girls were busy hanging out, filming silly home videos, playing Nerf wars and playing video games galore. Those were easily some of the greatest times of my childhood. So many epic sleepovers and events that took place whenever my Gaming Crew got together. A memoir devoted to those special times is long overdue and something I’ve been meaning to do for over a decade now. I loved my out-of-town Gaming Crew. It’s impossible for me to think about my childhood without those guys and gals coming to mind. Good times.

My Gaming Crew and I loved playing the SNES

If I could somehow travel in time back to any random Saturday night in 1993 or ’94, chances are, I’d find myself playing Super Bomberman with my Gaming Crew. We spent much of those two years bombing Saturday night away. The winner would play on while the three losers would switch off. It was some of the most fun I’ve ever had gaming. Even to this day, once in a blue moon I still reminisce back to those days with a real deep fondness. Times were simpler and more innocent back then for sure!

No feeling was sweeter than decimating your friends… unless you happen to kill two at the same time. This leads to major trash talk as well as those two victims ganging up on you for the next round. Is it worth it? You damn bet your ass it is!

BOMBS AWAY!

Super Bomberman came packaged with a new multitap adapter. This allowed up to four players to play and paved the way for home console multiplayer gaming. It’s just you, three friends, four tangled controllers and some soon-to-be-severely bruised egos. Whether you form temporary alliances to gang up on another player or you play it every man for himself, a good time is sure to be had for all.

Oh and here’s an alternative art style of the box. Shame we didn’t get this cool looking anime-like box in North America, eh? We got the stubby chunky looking Bombermen instead. I want my Bombermen with Super Deformed heads! Ahem…

ICONS OF DESTRUCTION

Here are just some of the icons you can pick up. My favorites being the boxing glove and the kicking one. Punching a bomb from one side to the other is a riot. And not all icons were good by the way. Look no further than the poison skull! My friend used to call it AIDS, since you could pass your disease on to others simply by touching them. One of my favorite memories was how he would get poisoned on purpose and then run around the field trying to tag everyone while screaming “AIDS!”

Each battle zone contains different icons. For example, in this stage you can collect the icon that increases your blast radius to cover the entire length of the field.

With this icon, set a bomb down and you can detonate it at any time. Otherwise, you have to wait the usual three or so seconds it takes for a bomb to explode. You can leave a bomb lying there for 20 seconds even, and then BANG! at the right moment. Or detonate it one second after dropping a bomb. (Just make sure you get out of the way first). It’s a game changer!

NORMAL MODE

Look at this creepy ol thing! — Look at this creepy ol’ thing!

Thats not disturbing at all... — That’s not disturbing at all…

BATTLE MODE

This was the ultimate party game experience back in 93 — It was the *ultimate party game experience* back in 1993

Adjust from four human players to even four computer players if you so wish. You can even sideline two of the bombers and make it a strictly 1-on-1 affair. Difficulty level of computer opponents can be adjusted from 1 to 10. Even if you have no one around to play with, you can still blow up three computer opponents to smithereens. Good stuff.

BATTLE ZONE ONE

Classic basic stage. Each player starts off on the side. Blow up blocks in hopes of unearthing goodies to increase your chances of survival. It’s the ultimate single screen kill-or-be-killed party game! I like how this stage layout prevents those lame “I lost because of X gimmick” excuses.

Remember collecting post-match icons in slow mo?

In the final minute of each round, blocks start falling from the sky until it encloses the remaining players in a very tight space. Nothing matches the thrill of being the last (bomber)man standing and the taunting that ensues over the course of the next 10 or so seconds.

BATTLE ZONE TWO

This isn’t called the Western Battle Zone for no reason! Things start out hot and wild as all four players are dumped right smack in the middle as the opening bell rings. Be careful or you could embarrass yourself right off the bat like the black bomberman does here. You’ll never hear the end of it if you mess up like such…

What makes this stage so intriguing is how intense it is. Four player Bomberman is intense enough bu you usually start out the first 20 or so seconds fairly safe on your own “island.” Not the case here! This is where quick thinking and deft movement makes the difference between glory and agony.

Whenever a bomber bites the dust, any icons he has secured during his time of play will be randomly strewn across the map. Grabbing as many as you can may very well decide the final outcome of that round. Be ready!

BATTLE ZONE THREE

Be careful not to stand near one of the dead ends, or it just may become one.

Blue bomber will hate my guts in 3, 2, 1... — Blue bomber will hate my guts in 3, 2, 1…

All’s fair in love and Bomberman. It’s a blast, pardon the pun, to lie in the wings and then go pick someone off who isn’t paying attention to the finer details…

BATTLE ZONE FOUR

The Jump Zone has trampolines that send you skyward and landing God knows where. I find the trampolines to be detrimental because they put you in harm’s way more than they benefit you. Get too cute here and it could come back to haunt you.

BATTLE ZONE FIVE

Wow, that was easy! — Wow, that was easy

The conveyor belt slows down bombers who walk on them the opposite way. The conveyor belt also transports bombs until detonation. Strategy is varied as you can do lots of different things, which makes the Belt Zone one of my personal favorites.

BATTLE ZONE SIX

Still one of my favorite maps of all time to this day

The epic classic Tunnel Zone. Nearly 25 years ago this was the stage we most often waged war on. Not only did it have the best look of all 12 stages but it consistently produced the most intense Bomberman battles, time in and time out.

Now thats a B-Movie title in the making! — Now that’s a B-Movie title in the making!

THIS STAGE. Such good memories. Our choice map probably 20% of the time, the amount of chaos and confusion it created was off the chain. The various pipes made bombing that much more intense. Lots of devious and cunning shenanigans were at play whenever we battled on this map.

Bomberman is a great test of your hand-eye coordination. Your multi-tasking skills are put to the test as you scan the entire playing field at all times. Add to this formula a bunch of vision obstructing pipes and suddenly you have Bomberman on steroids.

BATTLE ZONE SEVEN

The Duel Zone is another one of my favorites. Everyone starts out scrunched in the middle. Avoid death early on and then it’s a mad rush to see who can grab the most icons first. The one who does usually wins.

BATTLE ZONE EIGHT

The Flower Zone has always been a bit meh to me. My Gaming Crew also didn’t care much for it either back in the day.

BATTLE ZONE NINE

The Light Zone produced the most excuses. Two spotlights illuminate the playing field. It’s very difficult to keep track of where all the bombs are laid. It’s a very gimmicky map that I never much cared for.

Red thinks he's safe — Red thinks he’s safe

BATTLE ZONE TEN

It sure is. No stinking blocks to blow up here. No icons to collect. Because everyone starts out powered up to the max. Instant chaos!

BATTLE ZONE ELEVEN

Warp exits transport you randomly from one hole to the next but you never know exactly where your end destination may be, or if you’ll pop up in the middle of a blast. It’s best to avoid using them unless you have no other choice.

BATTLE ZONE TWELVE

Remember how back in the day some fighting games had codes for increased game speed? You don’t need no stinking codes here — the Speed Zone puts everyone at max speed. The excuses are bound to come in fast and heavy.

VICTORY!

While there is an option to play against one, two or three computer opponents, you have to experience this with three friends. There’s nothing quite like the unpredictability of human players and the pure joy of sitting around a TV talking smack with your buddies. Super Bomberman took couch co-op to the next level!

A COOL “LITTLE” SECRET

This code added even more wrinkles to the game. It’s especially ideal for maps like Tunnel and Light Zone.

SEND IN THE CLONES!

Similar to Street Fighter II and Doom, it didn’t take long before Bomberman clones started infiltrating the market (at least in Japan anyway). Some were downright terrible while most were actually more than competent. The most disappointing one is Bakuto Dochers. I remember seeing it featured within the pages of EGM and wondering as a kid if it might be a hidden gem. I finally played it some 12 years later in 2006 and it freaking sucks. Can’t win them all

Super Tekkyu Fight! is the most different of the clones. There’s an energy bar and players attack with long ranged chain balls rather than dropping bombs. It’s certainly a unique take on the old Bomberman formula.

Spark World is the most blatant of the clones, although it does do a few things differently from Bomberman (two hit system for example). It’s still a fun alternative even if it’s very derivative.

Otoboke Ninja Colosseum is the best of the clones for my money. One of the best hidden gems on the system that barely anyone ever talks about.

NEVER ENDING SEQUELS

Super Bomberman 2 was released the following year in September of 1994. While that was the last release America saw, the series didn’t end there on the SNES. Super Bomberman 3 came out in Europe and Japan in 1995. Super Bomberman 4 and Super Bomberman 5 were both released exclusively in Japan (April 1996 and February 1997 respectively). The biggest difference between the first two games and the last three? A fifth bomber was added to the latter three sequels. Other new options include the mad bomber, new rosters (no longer were you relegated to selecting different colored Bombermen) and arguably the biggest change of all: animal friends known as Louies. Louies gave you a specialized power and an extra life. Each year Hudson Soft just kept cranking out new Bomberman sequels like they were Friday the 13th or Nightmare on Elm Street. Super Bomberman 5 is my favorite of the three. But given the choice to play any one of the five, I still prefer the classic original. Perhaps that’s my nostalgia goggles talking but I’m a firm believer that the first one just felt and played the best.

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

Seemingly everyone loved the ever living hell out of Super Bomberman. It won EGM’s Game of the Month honors, earning scores of 9, 9, 9 and 9. GameFan gave it ratings of 70, 84, 90 and 90%. Super Play rated it 92%. In Super Play’s Top 100 Best SNES Games list, Super Bomberman ranked #23. Just about everyone agreed that it’s one of the best party games around, especially for its time. I have yet to meet one person who does not enjoy the four player mode with three friends in tow. It’s multi-player gaming at its finest. Sorry but I have to say it… this game’s DA BOMB.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

Super Bomberman is synonymous with the term party game. You could lock four friends in a room for 24 hours with only a Super Nintendo and a copy of this game and they would probably come out 24 hours later still pretty happy. Probably. It’s one of those brilliant simple games that anyone can pick up and enjoy. The concept is pure and timeless: drop some bombs, scurry around the corner, hope for the best, pick up icons, look for opportunities to trap the competition and gloat like hell when you do. For my money it’s the most fun single screen four player game ever made. Before the series became inundated with animal pals, mad bombers and such, there was Super Bomberman. By comparison it may look a little bare bones but oh did those bones have meat on them! I still prefer this game over any of the four SNES sequels, although Super Bomberman 5 is a close second.

My Gaming Crew and I poured so many hours into this game that the battle tune is forever embedded in my soul. I’ll never forget my friend’s infamous “L-Maneuver.” Dropping bombs in an L-formation, he would scurry away trash talking and hoping for the best. I can still hear his maniacal laugh and shouts of “L-Maneuver!” to this very day. So many late Saturday nights were spent in his room bombing the night away. There was something magical about it. It was a time in our lives where we were free to just be kids. Not a single worry about school or doing homework and chores. On those epic Saturday nights in Sacramento, all we concentrated on was being the last man standing. Playing for hours on end with losers switching off, those were some of the best gaming memories of my youth. Super Bomberman will always hold a special place in my gaming heart. While subsequent sequels added in mad bomber options, animal friends and even up to 10 players (Saturn Bomberman), I still prefer Super Bomberman by a hair. To me it had the most appealing battle zones, a purity that later sequels lost (I’m not a huge fan of the animal pals) and the nostalgia definitely does not hurt. Super Bomberman is a classic party game every Super Nintendo fan should have in their SNES collection.

Graphics: 7
Sound: 8
Gameplay: 10
Longevity: 10

Overall: 10

A classic quintessential party game that holds up well to this day. Its frenetic and fast-paced gameplay is video gaming magic personified. Super Bomberman is best experienced with three friends in tow. Easily one of the best 4-player games on the Super Nintendo!

"Damn, the black guy always has to die first eh?" — **“Damn, the black guy always has to die first, eh?”**

Bust-A-Move (SNES)

***Pub & Dev: Taito | March 1995 | 4 MEGS***

I love puzzle games. The good ones are fun, colorful, competitive and addicting as hell. I love how puzzle games appeals to even the most casual of gamers. There’s something about the genre that’s really satisfying and pure. And they’re the perfect type of games to introduce to your special lady friend for some quality couple gaming sessions. Lately, my girlfriend and I have been pouring hours into Tetris Attack, which I consider the best puzzle game on the SNES hands down. But there are plenty of worthy and honorable mentions. For example, look no further than Bust-A-Move. Known as Puzzle Bobble in Japan, Bust-A-Move is an offshoot of Taito’s 1986 arcade classic, Bubble Bobble. Taito struck gold once more as the Bust-A-Move series went on to become some of the most beloved and popular puzzle games of the ’90s.

LET’S START AT THE BEGINNING

Bust-A-Move originally came out in the arcades over 20 years ago in 1994. I didn’t have any memories of it until around 1996. It all started with my cousin Vivian. Growing up, she was the older sister I never had but always wanted. In late ’96, she embarked on a wild goose hunt to find a copy of PlayStation Bust-A-Move 2. I recall watching her walk a groove in her living room one late Fall afternoon as she called up one local gaming store after another. But no store carried this game and at the time we hadn’t yet been fully exposed to the power of the internet. She was never really a big gamer but Bust-A-Move 2 was her absolute favorite game. Somehow, it’s a memory that has stuck all these years later.

She eventually found a second hand copy later that year, and I recall all the crazy bubble bursting competitive fun we had that winter. It was a sentimental time for me as Christmas 1996 marked the last Christmas we spent at Vivian’s classic childhood home — they moved in 1997 so that Christmas proved to be the end of an era. Bust-A-Move 2 was such an excellent game with its simple bright colorful graphics and its mighty addicting bubble busting antics. It was the last time I remember gaming with Vivian, her brother Vince and my brother Kevin. We never really played another game after Bust-A-Move 2… not that I can recall. Good times they were. I can’t think of the Bust-A-Move series without thinking about those special times from a bygone era.

The ole neighborhood. Thanks for the memories

Coincidentally, my next memory of the Bust-A-Move series came nearly five years later. My gaming fandom came full circle in January of 2001…

I saw a Sega Saturn lying on the ground at my buddy’s house when I came over to study for a huge physics exam. Keep in mind that the PlayStation was all the rage back then and by 2001 the Saturn was a long afterthought.

“Hey, you’re the first person I know who has one too,” I said, pointing to his Saturn.

“Oh yeah? I didn’t know you had a Saturn, too. To be honest with you, I haven’t touched that thing in years.”

What’s this? I noticed Street Fighter Alpha 2 and Bust-A-Move 2 beside the system. Both games were looking real pretty in their big bulky American cases. Seeing all that triggered something deep inside of me that I thought was long dead. Suddenly I felt very excited about gaming again in a way I had not felt in some time.

“I still play my Saturn, but it’s been a while too,” I told my friend.

“If you want some of the games, go ahead. Take some. It’s cool.”

I nearly fell over. “Wow. But I can’t do that, man.”

“No, go for it. Really. I don’t play them anymore. Plus I never even bought any of them to begin with.”

“I can’t, really, but thanks…”

“You sure?”

“… I’ll just take these two,” I said quickly as the moment overtook me. I lured Street Fighter Alpha 2 and Bust-A-Move 2 out of the pile. I remember seeing BUG! but not caring enough about it. I just wanted some Street Fighter and BAM 2 action!

I found it difficult the rest of the study session to focus on atoms or Murphy’s Law, and who could blame me. The moment of truth arrived when I came home and fired the games up one by one. I cheered for every successful Dragon Punch, and I cringed for every “NO, I AIMED THE FREAKIN’ BUBBLE OVER THERE, NOT THERE!” moment. And it was freaking GLORIOUS.

Street Fighter Alpha 2 blew me away. It played so smoothly and had the right mix of style and substance. Playing Bust-A-Move 2 was like being back at an arcade hall, plopping a quarter into a simple but delightful puzzle game to tide me over until the line for the latest fighting game died down a bit. Ah, good times.

It was an amazing arcade-like experience I had that fine evening. I felt like I was right back in the arcades. It made me think about what other gems the Saturn has to offer. As they say, the rest is history.

HOW TO PLAY

Anyone can play this! — *Anyone* can play it!

Link 3 or more together — Link up 3 or more

MEET OUR HEROES

MODES OF PLAY

There are four different ways to play. You have the single player quest where you’re given 100 levels of set bubbles. It’s your job to burst them all before the ceiling comes crashing down on ya. In this mode there are three special kind of bubbles, in addition to the eight normal different colored bubbles. Bubble Bobble fans will find these special bubbles familiar…

It converts others... — It converts others…

... to the same color — … to the same color

This mode offers 100 levels of mayhem. A password is given when you lose all of your 7 continues. It’s always fun to see what the next stage might bring. Some of the designs are rather creative. Take this octopus stage for example!

How far can you go before losing all your continues? It starts out easy but quickly becomes a house of horrors. The password feature is a huge help since it lets you finish the game at your own pace.

Next up we have the Challenge Mode. Play on a single screen until you bust. The total amount of bubbles you burst is tracked. This is a simple and nice little mode when you’re in that endurance mood.

Next up is the VS. CPU mode. Perfect for when you want some competition but no one is around to play with.

But the best mode is 2 player versus. It’s super competitive and has that “just one more match” magic. This can suck hours from your life. It’s so cute and fun that anyone can play this and have a good time, even the most casual of gamers.

You damn right it is

AGONY AND TRIUMPH

Part of the agony of Bust-A-Move is the ill-aimed bubble. You’ll try to squeeze it through but ultimately to no avail. It doesn’t get any more frustrating than that. One misplaced bubble can change the tide of battle. For example, I just missed connecting with the four yellow bubbles there.

... bubbles off the wall — … bubbles off the wall

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

Bust-A-Move was well received. EGM gave it scores of 7, 7, 8 and 9. Super Play Magazine rated it 84% and ranked it as the 48th best SNES game back in their April 1996 issue. Speaking of Top 100 lists, Nintendo Power ranked it as the 96th best game in their 100th issue. While the ad obviously uses hyperbole to market the game, Bust-A-Move is nothing short of being highly competitive and addicting. It’s kind of a shame that I rarely see this game being talked about much even in SNES circles, but I guess that’s because most people would rather play one of the later renditions. But that doesn’t change the fact that the original is still a winner.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

Bust-A-Move is one of those rare games that I can pick up and play at any time. I can go at it solo for 20 minutes or battle a buddy for 2 hours. Aiming the bubbles to align correctly is crazy addictive and it’s awesome when you get locked in the zone. Some people feel the gameplay involves too much luck for their own liking, especially with the wall shots, but there’s definitely a need for skill. There’s more luck involved here than a puzzle game such as Puyo Puyo but that’s part of what makes it different and unique. No matter how good you get, you can always misfire a bubble and lose by the smallest margin of error. It keeps the matches exciting and unpredictable.

While this admittedly isn’t the best rendition of the series you could play, it’s still pretty awesome. I enjoy the Sega Saturn sequel even more, but this game certainly has a place in my SNES library. It has that classic “one more game” quality to it. Few games can match the intensity that Bust-A-Move provides. This is the type of game that will never go out of style and will always entertain. Thank you, Taito, for giving SNES owners a small taste of bubble busting glory.

Graphics: 6
Sound: 6
Gameplay: 9
Longevity: 9

Overall: 9.0
Gold Award

"SEE YOU NEXT GAME!" — ***“SEE YOU NEXT GAME!”***

Tetris Attack (SNES)

**Pub: Nintendo | Dev: Intelligent Systems | August 1996 | 8 MEGS**

Tetris, released in the summer of 1984, is the most classic puzzle game ever created. Hell, EGM deemed it the best video game of all time (issue #100, November 1997). More than a decade later, Tetris Attack redefined the puzzle genre. Originally released on October 27, 1995 in Japan as Panel de Pon, the game received a Yoshi’s Island makeover for its North American localization in the summer of 1996. It was also granted the Tetris name to further increase its appeal, even though technically it has nothing to do with the Tetris formula. Regardless, Tetris Attack effortlessly worked its way into our hearts and stands as arguably the greatest 16-bit puzzle game of all time.

ATTACK OF THE FLEA MARKET
-Saturday, February 4, 2006-

*beep*

*Beep*

*BEEP*

*BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!*

Staggering out of bed like Otis Campbell on a Saturday night, I shifted my way through the darkness to put an end to the madness. The thought of crawling back in bed was nearly as tempting as Jessica Alba herself. The idea, however, went quickly as it came.

After brushing my teeth and helping myself to a bowl of cereal, I found the dawn just breaking between two white buildings. The sky was mostly gray but a streak of white stretched itself from the end of a flagpole. By the time I finished breakfast, the sky was lighter than it had been when I woke up — the streak of gray broadening into a patch of brilliant day.

I was a man on a mission. Three weeks into my SNES rebirth (1.17.06), I was gearing to embark on my first flea market voyage since 2002. With a wish list the size of Rosie’s waistline and a wallet jammed full of dead presidents, I headed off into that cool early morning, the light February breeze brushing against my face. As I pulled into the parking lot something told me today was going to be a good day. Maybe even a great one. I gazed at the box office where I saw the growing crowd purchasing their tickets. Just think, I thought to myself… beyond that building there… lies a part of my childhood.

My first flea market haul 2.4.06) — My first flea market haul (2.4.06)

I remember the morning rather well; the smell of apricot in the air, the bustling crowds all jabbering for bargains, and at long last — the lady with the game stand parked over at the far end. I dove head first into the SNES bin like Rickey Henderson stealing third base. All her games were wrapped. I eagerly waded through each one, picking out Final Fight, Dino City, Battletoads in Battlemaniacs, Flashback and Tetris Attack.

What a FLASHBACK to my youth... — What a *FLASHBACK* to my youth…

Each of those games ran me $5 except for Tetris Attack. Some of these games I hadn’t played in 12, 15 years! There’s nothing quite like the rush of rediscovering games from your youth on a brisk, early Saturday morning. There’s just something awesome about it. It’s hard to look back on one’s early collecting days and not break out a nostalgic smile. It was the rush and the feeling of getting back into the fandom after so many years, acquiring games left and right… those are some sacred memories right there!

The vendor was a nice elderly lady in her 50’s. I showed her each game that I wanted as she sprouted off, “Five dollas, five dollas,” but she paused when Tetris Attack came up. Somehow, I knew she would.

There was no way in HELL I was getting Tetris Attack for a measly five bucks…

She grabbed the game from me and squinted long and hard at it. Oh boy, I thought to myself, here it comes. $20, maybe $25. Yup, Steve-O, you can kiss this bargain goodbye. She burned a hole through Tetris Attack before finally saying…

".... MMMM... seven dollas" — *“… MMMM… seven dollas OK?”*

I wanted to jump in the air and pump my fist. But I kept my cool and told the lady in a calm voice, “Sounds good.” All in all, it was $27 well spent! Crazy to think this happened just over 12 years ago now… (read more about my Flea Market Memoirs).

CHAIN GANG

As is the case with most puzzle games, the name of the game is chaining together combo hits to quickly derail the competition.

Don’t worry, there’s even a handy tutorial to acclimate new players.

Eliminate all 10 panels with one simple switch.

Switch the gray block over which drops the red heart. This leads to all 18 panels being cleared.

Combos are nice but chains are deadly. Check out this three hit chain reaction.

Recently I introduced a friend to Tetris Attack. We took time to view the combo tutorial. She kept saying, “Yeah right, like that shit ever happens.”

Speaking of improbable, skill chains are crazy. All this time and I have still yet to pull off one of these bad boys in actual versus competition.

GAME MODES

There’s plenty of 1-player modes to keep you busy even if you’re going at it solo. Let’s check out the VS. mode first.

Clearing four or more panels will drop a garbage block on your opponent’s screen.

Clearing three shock panels (the gray blocks with the white ! marks) drops a Shock Block on your opponent’s screen. Shock Blocks prevents any garbage blocks or other Shock Blocks on top of it from being cleared. Match four shock panels to send two Shock Blocks, match five shock panels to send three Shock Blocks and so forth.

Rather than being your typical falling piece puzzler, you move a cursor around the screen and switch pieces around. Part of the fun comes in clearing out one group and quickly yanking out another piece to cause another combo, as seen above. Tetris Attack favors the swift.

Computer opponent is almost done for. Apply the finishing touch by switching those two pieces there. Six piece combo!

Unfortunately there is no battery backed memory here. Just passwords. Yoshi liberates those that he beats.

Computer gets its revenge with a sick 3-hit chain attack, followed up by a 6-piece combo for good measure.

Dropping loads of garbage blocks is the name of the game. After you liberate the eight main characters, you face four bosses.

Hookbill the Koopa and Naval Piranha are the first two bosses you’ll face.

Magikoopa Kamek and Bowser are the final two.

OTHER MODES

There’s plenty of modes to pick from in the 1-player game. Puzzle Mode gives you a limited amount of moves to clear all the pieces.

Things start out easy but fools rushing in can easily get tripped up.

Another mode is Stage Clear. Clear all the panels above the special clear marker to beat the stage and move on. In addition to the VS. CPU mode, there’s also a Time Trial and Endless mode.

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

Tetris Attack fared extremely well with the critics. It was widely beloved by most that played it. EGM gave it scores of 7.5, 8.0, 8.5 and 9.0. Super Play rated it 90%. Nintendo Power ranked it the 17th best game in their 100th issue. EGM placed it #16 on their own Top 100 list.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

It’s fitting I’m writing this on Valentines Day because I freaking love Tetris Attack. Its main appeal is that it’s competitive and fun as hell. It’s also very accessible — literally almost anyone can play it and enjoy it. The handicap options ensure that everyone has a fighting chance to win, especially with a little practice under their belt. Few things are as intense as a match that goes down to the wire with both screens about to hit critical mass. It’s just a shame that it was released so late into the Super Nintendo’s lifespan. Alas, the old cliché rings ever true: better late than never.

Whereas most puzzle games depend on random falling blocks and a fair bit of luck, Tetris Attack stands out by letting you move a cursor around to rearrange the blocks as you see fit, creating your own combos and chains. It’s easy to pick up and play but difficult to master — the mark of a truly terrific puzzle game. The visuals are simple but bright and pleasing to the eye. There are some catchy tunes as one might expect but ultimately it’s the addicting gameplay that is the main draw of the game. 20+ years and counting and Tetris Attack still finds itself frequently occupying the slot of my SNES. For my money, it’s the best puzzle game on the system and easily one of the Super Nintendo’s top 20 games. Very few games can you constantly play and not get sick of. Tetris Attack belongs in that elite fraternity.

Graphics: 8
Sound: 7
Gameplay: 9.5
Longevity: 10

Overall: 9.5

Arkanoid: Doh It Again (SNES)

***Pub: Nintendo | Dev: Taito | November 1997 | 4 MEGS***

Last year, many SNES games celebrated their 25th anniversary. 2018 will mark 25 years for SNES games that came out in 1993. Meanwhile, Arkanoid: Doh It Again just turned 20. Released just in time for the Christmas season of 1997, Arkanoid is one of the last SNES games to come out in North America. Most gamers had long migrated to the PlayStation or N64 by then, but loyal SNES owners were treated to a nice update of an old classic title.

RECLAIMING THE RELICS OF MY YOUTH

Many of us who got back into classic gaming at some point I think fondly remembers that feeling of getting back into the fandom for the first time in ages. I’ll never forget that first quarter of 2006. The SNES bug bit me hard and on many early Saturday mornings I would wake up at the butt crack of dawn, hop into my car and drive down many windy roads in search of local flea markets. With a list of wants in the hundreds and a pocket full of dead presidents, it was a winning formula for always going back home with at least something. I met many vendors in my time, most memorable of all being “Mr. Mean.” He had tons of Super Nintendo games but they were way overpriced and he was generally a miserable grouch (hence the nickname). One day I saw Arkanoid and felt my heart leaping for joy. Mr. Mean quickly shattered that when he gave me a ridiculous price quote. I walked away feeling a tad discouraged. But it’s not how you start, it’s how you finish…

Still, I kept my head up and continued happily exploring the rest of the flea market. At the 4th vendor I spotted Pac-Attack and *DUN DUN DUN* Arkanoid: Doh It Again. Funny how life can work in mysterious ways. I was denied Arkanoid just five minutes earlier by Mr. Mean, but here I was with another vendor who happened to have a copy of the same game as well. However, he was hesitant to sell Arkanoid off the bat.

“I don’t know… isn’t this game rare?” he asked, scratching his head.

“Nope.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah. I actually just saw it at the very last vendor.”

He examined the glossy game label long and hard, squinting even. He studied the Easter Island statue with burning intensity. Finally he looked back up. “Alright, I trust you… $5 it is then. With the Pac-Man game it’ll be $10.”

In your face, Mr. Mean! Ah, ARKANOID. I have some fond memories of playing the game on my computer in the late ’90s when my bro and I first discovered emulation. Kevin and I had already donated our SNES to our cousin David by the time my brother found out about roms and such. I remember it well; I was a sophomore in high school at the tail end of the ’90s, walking home from school one day talking with a buddy about my brother’s discovery the night before. This was how I first experienced Arkanoid: Doh It Again. I was taken aback by its simple and addictive gameplay. Fast forward to that day in 2006 at the flea market, things came full circle some 7-8 years later when I finally bought Arkanoid at long last.

THE STORY GOES…

Commander Therle searches for a home but Doh blocks him. Doh is a heinous intergalactic entity hellbent on causing contamination and utter destruction.

Sending out a scout ship to analyze the surroundings, the sentient being Doh immediately springs into action.

It reminds me fondly of the Easter Island heads I grew up seeing in the Gradius games and Godzilla movies.

Rocking that Mode 7 to the very bitter end, eh?

With 99 levels to beat, this comes in mighty handy

SICK POWER-UPS

Barriers can be a true lifesaver as can the “Viagra” power-up. Touch the blue capsule and watch your ship grow!

There’s a limit to how long it can grow but at its max, it can cover damn near one half the playing field! Nice.

Another awesome power-up, this capsule shoots out eight balls. Brings new meaning to the term, “Balls to the walls,” no?

FUN LEVELS

So pass it cross the table like ping pong.
I’m gone, beating my chest like King Kong.
And when it comes to get another stogie…
fools all kick in like Shinobi. I GOT 5 ON IT!

[More like this, right? -Ed.] Har har — *[More like this, right? -Ed.]* I swear, it *really was* 5 minutes

Little bad guys litter some of the stages — Little enemies litter some of the stages

Arkanoid: Doh It Again throws a boss at you every once in a while. This is a nice break from the norm and helps to add some much needed variety to freshen things up.

Backgrounds change every 11 levels. The backgrounds are well done and add a certain atmosphere to the game. I particularly like the one with the humans traveling in space.

Boss fights are the best part of this game. It adds a fresh feel to an old formula. They’re very much welcomed, indeed.

TABLE FOR TWO, PLEASE

Game B is my favorite mood — Game B is my favorite mode

Arkanoid is pretty fun on your own but it really shines when playing with a buddy. There are three different 2 player modes. Game A has you and a bud alternating turns. Game C pits both players against the same map and the first to clear said map is declared victorious. But Game B is clearly the bread winner. Team up with a friend in some awesome co-op action. Player 2 plays behind you and can swat away any ball player 1 misses. You switch places for each level. This is incredibly fun and one of the better 2 player co-op experiences on the SNES.

This isn't shabby but it's got nothing on Mode B — This isn’t shabby but it’s got nothing on Mode B

This is so true. I’ve played this mode with my sister in law and my girlfriend. Both of them are casual game players and don’t go out of their way to play games as a solo hobby. But they both loved playing this game. It’s perfect to play with a friend or significant other who isn’t into video games. It’s so simple and fun that anyone can play this and have a good time.

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

December 1997. EGM issue #102 (January 1998) arrived in my mailbox. We were in the thick of the 32-bit era as you can see from the cover. Resident Evil 2 was the big title at the time. Yet in the back of the magazine, in the reviews section, I saw something that caught my eye. There was a Super Nintendo game being reviewed! It had been forever since EGM last reviewed a Super Nintendo game. Fun trivia tip: Arkanoid was the last SNES game EGM ever reviewed. It received scores of 7.0, 7.5, 8.0 and 8.5. Very respectable scores indeed. My brother and I were both out of the Super Nintendo scene by then but still, I remember being happy seeing the review. It was like seeing a dear old friend again after so many years and finding out that life had been good to them.

This was a comforting sight to see back in late 1997

CLOSING THOUGHTS

There’s something cool and soothing about Arkanoid: Doh It Again. Maybe it’s the contrasting combination of retro gaming goodness spliced with futuristic ambience. Or maybe it’s the awesome and addictive co-op 2 player mode that is instantly accessible to all. It’s probably all of that and then some. The graphics won’t wow anyone but they get the job done, although on some stages it can get tough at times to make out the ball due to the background. Some of the tunes fit well like a glove and there’s nothing like the sound of your ball bouncing off of a bad guy. The game has a timeless quality to it. Whenever the latest game lets me down, I know Arkanoid will always be there ready to whisk me to a far away world where lasers thrive and Easter Island heads rule.

Several years ago my sister in law wanted to sample one of my Super Nintendo games. She’s not much of a gamer at all, mind you. I mulled over my collection trying to select just the right 2 player experience that she might enjoy. It was an instant no-brainer the second my eyes landed on Arkanoid. As soon as we set up the 2 player co-op mode, we were both talking trash at the TV, high-fiving each other and shouting at every missed ball and subsequent second player save. It quickly dawned on me then and there that Arkanoid: Doh It Again presents one of the best 2 player experiences on the SNES. More recently, I’ve introduced this game to my girlfriend and she too digs the co-op mode. Sadly, because it came out so late in the system’s life, Arkanoid is something of an unsung gem in the SNES library. It’s one of those rare special games that anyone can pick up and play whether they’re 8 or 80. Not to mention have a blast along the way. As such, Arkanoid is definitely deserving of a spot in any SNES collection.

Graphics: 7
Sound: 8
Gameplay: 8.5
Longevity: 8.5

Overall: 8.5

WWF Raw (SNES)

**Pub: LJN | Dev: Sculptured Software | November 1994 | 24 MEGS**

WWE’s flagship show, Monday Night Raw, celebrated 25 years this past Monday. Many iconic old wrestling legends made special guest appearances for the big birthday bash. In addition, the 31st annual Royal Rumble was held last night so let’s just say I am in a WWE state of mind. Having just recently reviewed WWF Royal Rumble, I can’t think of a better time to look at the sequel, WWF Raw, than right now.

25 GAWD DAMN YEARS

Congratulations to Vince McMahon and the entire crew. 25 straight years of weekly episodic TV is nothing to sneeze at. These guys and gals have entertained me and millions of others over the past quarter century. It kinda makes one feel old, eh? Although the actual 25th anniversary show was admittedly a bit of a flop, it did bring back to mind a ton of fond Raw memories.

The very first episode of Monday Night Raw emanated from the Manhattan Center in New York on January 11, 1993. It was an intimate venue and there was a raw energy (pardon the pun) to the whole show. It was must-see TV back then. I rarely missed a week.

Nowadays Raw is held in much larger venues and often has crowds of 15,000 or so. The show also went from one hour to three hours over the years. It’s way too much to consume these days yadda yadda insert bitter old timer wrestling fan rant here. But I still keep up with the product if nothing else out of habit and to relish those fleeting genuinely great moments that gets me jumping out of my seat like I’m five years old all over again.

TOP 5 RAW MOMENTS

There have been many epic moments in the history of Monday Night Raw. The night Mick Foley (AKA Mankind) won the WWF Championship. The retirement speeches of Ric Flair and Edge. Goldberg’s touching speech the night after WrestleMania 33. The invasion of ECW and WCW. Pee Wee Herman and The Miz trading verbal jabs on the mic. CM Punk’s pipe bomb. Chris Jericho’s countdown debut interrupting The Rock. And so much more. But here are my top 5 moments from 25 years of Monday Night Raw.

5. GET FAMOUS, KID!

Back then Vince McMahon was an on-air commentator. He often screamed “Welcome to Monday Night Raw, where ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN!“ It wasn’t just a throwaway comment, either. Back in those days especially, it rang true. Perhaps never more than one fateful night on May 17, 1993.

Perennial superstar Razor Ramon was throwing the Kid around the ring like a rag doll. The Kid had appeared on TV for a while now, always losing matches left and right. Surely Razor was going to pick up the squash victory, right?

Not so fast! A crazy moonsault from the Kid and it was 1-2-3! The Manhattan Center erupted and the Kid launched his career into the stratosphere. Now known as the 1-2-3 Kid, this was a life changing night for Sean Waltman and made Monday Night Raw truly must-see TV.

4. THE END OF THE MONDAY NIGHT WAR

For years WCW and WWF went head-to-head for wrestling supremacy on Monday nights. Nitro and Raw found themselves embroiled in a heated rivalry until it officially culminated on March 26, 2001. It was a historic simulcast of both Raw and Nitro. Shane McMahon was live on Nitro while his dad Vince was live on Raw. And that’s when Shane dropped the infamous bombshell, “The name on the contract does say McMahon… *audience gasp* HOWEVER, the contract reads SHANE MCMAHON! That’s right — I NOW OWN WCW!“ Such a historic announcement and Vince’s shocked expression was simply priceless.

3. A STUNNING SAVIOR

One of the creepiest images in Raw history

Before Stephanie McMahon became the “Billion Dollar Princess” and Authority figure gone wrong, she was little innocent Stephanie. On April 26, 1999, wrestling fans bore witness to one of the craziest angles ever shot for national TV. It was set to be the unholy wedding between Stephanie and The Undertaker. They strapped Steph to a cross-like symbol and it made for some WTF is happening right now TV.

Seeing The Undertaker (in his Ministry of Darkness incarnation) caressing a 22 year old Stephanie McMahon made for some uncomfortable TV. At the same time, you couldn’t help but not look away.

Paul Bearer read Steph her unholy vows. Who was going to save poor Steph from the evil clutches of the vile Dead Man? Out of nowhere the glass shatters and the fans in Hartford, Connecticut erupted in unison. STONE COLD! STONE COLD! STONE COLD!

Stone Cold Steve Austin and Vince McMahon were bitter rivals at that time, so it was hard to imagine Austin saving Vince’s daughter. But it was the unlikeliness of the event that added layers to Austin’s character. At the end of the day, Stephanie was innocent and undeserving of such heinous acts. Austin was simply out to restore order and deliver justice when no one else could (and many tried such as Ken Shamrock and The Big Show). I’ll never forget the emotional embrace Stephanie gave Austin after he untied her from that wicked cross-like symbol. Austin held his arms out like “OK OK whoa calm down, take it easy… just doing my job, young lady.” It felt like the satisfying conclusion to some big action summer blockbuster where the bodyguard saves the damsel in distress. Rarely have I felt so emotional watching Raw than this moment right here!

"Alright alright youre safe now. Easy, Steph" — *“Alright you safe now. Easy there!”*

2. THE ULTIMATE FAREWELL

One of my favorite superstars from the ’80s was The Ultimate Warrior. He was larger than life, crazier than a pet coon and just a comic book superhero come to life. Sure his matches weren’t all that great but it was the moments and memories he created that live on forever.

After a near 20 year hiatus from WWE for various reasons, the Warrior returned in 2014 to headline the Hall of Fame class. The night following WrestleMania 30, Warrior made his first Monday Night Raw appearance in nearly two decades. He gave a short but moving speech. In it he talked about how every man’s heart one day beats its final beat and his lungs breathes its final breath. Eerily enough, Warrior died the following day due to heart issues.

Vince and Warrior embrace each other one last time

On the bright side, he got to make amends with Vince McMahon, Hulk Hogan and a host of others right before he passed away. He also got to go out in a blaze of glory before his adoring fans. Not so many people get that chance. I know Warrior did and said some crappy things in his life, but I like to think by the end of his life he had changed and made peace with everything. That’s the version I like to believe in. At any rate, his speech on April 7, 2014 stands as one of my most favorite Raw memories.

The Ultimate Warrior's final remarks — The Ultimate Warrior’s haunting final remarks

1. THE “HART” OF THE MATTER

Speaking of unresolved issues and personal vendettas, my number one favorite Raw moment was when one of my favorites, Bret “The Hitman” Hart returned to WWE TV for the first time in over 12 years. January 4, 2010, Bret Hart finally came home to guest host Monday Night Raw. But more than that, Bret came to clear the air once and for all.

Wrestling fans know all too well about the infamous Montreal Screwjob from Survivor Series 1997. It changed wrestling history forever. For a long time Bret and Shawn lived in its shadow. But on this very special and surreal night, the two came together to hash it out in front of a live national TV audience.

Seeing two of my all-time favorites shake hands and bury the hatchet on live TV gave me the feels. According to Bret and Shawn in later interviews, this was their first real interaction in nearly 13 years since the Screwjob. This moment was not rehearsed — the emotions displayed from the two were real and genuine. I also love that it transcends wrestling. How many relationships in our lives have we let pride, ego and vanity get the worst of us? Sometimes forgiving someone as well as yourself is the key to true freedom.

GET RAW!

Glitchy? Nope, it’s the classic original Raw intro nicely replicated. Gotta love that early-mid ’90s grungy style (or not).

RAW RASSLERS

The 1-2-3 Kid (AKA X-Pac AKA Sean Waltman) is most well known for upsetting Razor Ramon in a match that launched Monday Night Raw from a fun novelty to must-see TV.

Finishing Move: Moonsault — Finisher: Moonsault

Just like ol times, eh? — Just like old times, eh?

The Beast From The East is one of the most underrated and agile big men of all time. And hey, not many wrestlers can claim that they headlined a WrestleMania! Which Bam Bam did with Lawrence Taylor at WrestleMania 11.

Bret Hart is one of the best in-ring technicians of all time. It blew my mind when I discovered years later why his finishing maneuver is called the Sharpshooter. That’s because he’s Bret “The Hitman” Hart. How did I miss that back in the day?

Initially a badass bodyguard to The Heartbreak Kid, Shawn Michaels, Diesel eventually broke out and became one of the company’s biggest stars, both literally and figuratively. Big Daddy Cool also played SUPER SHREDDER in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze.

That's Kevin Nash under all that get-up! — That’s Kevin Nash under all that get-up!

Some may remember Doink as a silly gimmick character, but the original Doink was straight up evil and diabolical. That version, played by Matt Osborne, was absolutely brilliant. There’s something very unsettling about evil clowns.

Vince McMahon tried to turn Lex Luger into the next big thing after Hulk Hogan left the company in mid 1993. Luger received a massive push and even got his own Lex Express. Unfortunately for Lex and Vince, the vision was never fully realized as Lex Luger never panned out to the level either man had hoped for.

Finisher: Running Steel Forearm — Finisher: Running Forearm

Before the WWE went crazy with their “Women’s Evolution” marketing and branding, Luna Vachon was breaking down barriers in the mid ’90s. She was the first female superstar to appear as a playable character in a WWF video game. Long before you had the Lass Kicker Becky Lynch or the Boss Sasha Banks, you had Luna Vachon — a badass woman not to be trifled with.

Bret’s younger brother, Owen Hart, emerged as a supreme talent in 1994. Cocky and brash, Owen had it all. In-ring skills, high flying moves and he was a great talker, too. It’s a shame he fell to his tragic death from a pre-match stunt gone horribly wrong in 1999. We’ll never forget ya, Owen.

Hey yo. Razor was one of my favorites back in the day and it saddened me deeply when he fell into hard times following his wrestling career. An alcoholic on the verge of death several times, he managed to clean himself up with the help of his good friend and all around good guy Diamond Dallas Page. Using DDP Yoga and living with DDP propelled Scott Hall to quell his demons and get his life back in order. His 2014 induction into the Hall of Fame was a touching moment, and produced one of the best lines I’ve ever heard: “Bad times don’t last… BUT BAD GUYS DO!”

Finisher: Razor's Edge — Finisher: Razor’s Edge

Shawn Michaels is arguably the greatest in-ring performer of all time. When comparing Shawn with his peer Bret Hart, one guy said it best when he said “Bret had the best matches but Shawn put on the best performances.” I’ve never seen another wrestler rise to the occasion quite like HBK. Truly a once-in-a-generation talent!

It’s often been said that The Undertaker is Vince’s greatest creation. That’s certainly debatable with Hulk Hogan and whatnot, but there’s no debating the fact that The Undertaker has had one amazing and storied career. There’s a reason why so many fans and wrestlers respect Mark Calaway so much. No one else could have pulled off the character the way that he did.

The man who killed Hulkamania, Yokozuna was a friggin’ beast. He was extremely agile for his size and his Banzai Drop always made me quiver in my seat. To cap it off, he was managed by both Mr. Fuji (the devious one) and Jim Cornette. Talk about being a heat magnet!

MEGA MOVES AND MORE

WWF Raw was an improvement over WWF Royal Rumble in a number of ways. For starters, Raw assigned more unique moves to the wrestlers. There are also secret super special moves known as “Mega Moves.” In addition, Raw incorporated a rating system. Although it’s a little shady to say the least. Each wrestler’s rating total equals 26 points. I have a really hard time believing that Diesel’s strength is only a measly 6 out of 10. Honestly though it doesn’t seem to matter as far as I can tell. The wrestlers’ speed and strength don’t appear to differ in execution. On a side note, Raw made history being the first 4-player WWF game on home consoles.

6 strength? That's BS! — 6 strength? That’s BS!

Mega Move: Dynamite Punch — Mega Move: Dynamite Uppercut

HBK stronger than Nash? Ha! — HBK’s stats are all messed up!

MODES OF MAYHEM

Raw is jam packed with modes galore. This is another aspect that Sculptured Software improved on from Royal Rumble. With the Royal Rumble match carrying over, Raw effectively renders Royal Rumble obsolete more or less.

Bedlam free-for-all Brawl is my favorite mode. It lets all four wrestlers battle in the ring at the same time in a fight to the finish. I like the campy small television monitors hanging out around ringside. It brings back memories of Raw’s earliest days in the Manhattan Center.

Trademark moves such as Razor Ramon’s fall away slam are nicely represented. Royal Rumble featured unique finishers but the wrestlers all shared the same moveset. Not so much with Raw.

Backdrop your opponents out of the ring in the Royal Rumble match.

Shawn Michaels and Razor Ramon are knee deep in the drop zone. Diesel wins it all. If this were 2018, he would be pointing at the WrestleMania sign right about now…

RATTLE THE REF

Just like in WWF Royal Rumble, you can knock out the ref. It never gets old.

Refs bumping just like in real life — Refs bump just like in real life

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

Although never reviewed by either EGM or GameFan, they spoke rather favorably of WWF Raw in previews. Super Play called it bigger and better than its predecessor, Royal Rumble, and rated it 84%.

Interestingly enough, WWF Magazine rated it an 8 out of 10. I was subscribed to WWF Magazine back in 1994 and I can remember being a little quizzical when I first saw that score. The official WWF Magazine only gave Raw an 8 rating? Usually these things tend to oversell a product by a point or two. For Raw to only get an 8 gave me a little bit of pause.

WWF Magazine certainly didn't overhype it — WWF Magazine certainly didn’t overhype it

CLOSING THOUGHTS

My brother and I bought WWF Raw back in late 1994 and we had a blast with it. It was fun for its time but similar to Royal Rumble, it hasn’t aged so well. I’m just not a big fan of its “who can tap the buttons the fastest” system. I much prefer grapples being determined by timing. It’s a shame we never got a definitive WWF game on the SNES. But WWF Raw is probably the closest thing to such.

It was the first WWF home console game to feature a 4-player mode. My friends and I wasted hours on the Bedlam Brawl mode. The Mega Moves added an extra layer to the game and there were plenty of modes to go around. Raw is by no means a bad game, but at the same time it’s a little disappointing. It’s a competent game, especially if you don’t mind its button mashing nature, but it still feels like a lot of unrealized potential.

While WWF Raw may not fully measure up in the way I would have liked, it’s still fairly fun especially when played with three pals.

Graphics: 7
Sound: 7
Gameplay: 7
Longevity: 6

Overall: 7.0

More of my WWF ramblings here!

WWF Royal Rumble (SNES)

***Pub: LJN | Dev: Sculptured Software | June 1993 | 16 MEGS***

I grew up on professional wrestling and have been a fan for over 30 years now. I first fell in love with the WWF when I witnessed the birth of the Mega Powers on a Saturday Night’s Main Event episode in late 1987. Throughout the years I’ve attended shows and followed the product. It’s had its ups and downs but it’s one of those things that has become a part of me, much like video games. One of my favorite WWF events growing up was the Royal Rumble. So imagine my joy back in the summer of 1993 when WWF Royal Rumble was released on the SNES. The previous WWF game on the SNES, WWF Super Wrestlemania, was pretty meh. Would Sculptured Software redeem itself with Royal Rumble?

Not so super... — Not so super. Wish we got *WWF Wrestlefest* instead

We should have got this instead! — Oh what could have been

Released in 1991 by Technos, WWF Wrestlefest was something of a mythical legend in my gaming group growing up. The game was larger than life and as colorful as the wrestlers themselves. One of my biggest SNES disappointments is that there was never a Wrestlefest port. Instead we got WWF Super Wrestlemania and it sucked.

"TELL EM, HAWK!" — **“TELL ‘EM, HAWK!”**

"WEEEEEEEELL!!!!!!" — ***“WEEEEEEEELL!!!!!!”***

The action spills to the ouside — The action spills to the outside

"WHAT CHU GONNA DO BROTHER?!" — ***“WHAT CHU GONNA DO, BROTHER?!”***

Despite all my rage Im still a rat in a cgae — *Despite all my rage I’m still a rat in a cage*

Wrestlefest was legendary back in 1991 — The stuff legends are made of

But we got this instead :P — But we got this instead

Now this is more like it. Not Wrestlefest, but hey — Now this is more like it. Not *Wrestlefest*, but hey

THE ROYAL RUMBLE

The Royal Rumble has always been one of my favorite WWE events of the year. 30 men duking it out, a new wrestler comes out every two minutes (ish) and surprises galore. From returning superstars to one-off legend returns to debuting talent, that buzzer always brings a certain level of excitement and anticipation.

Tonight marks the 31st Annual Royal Rumble. It will also feature the first ever 30 women Royal Rumble match. Whatever happens and whoever wins, I’m expecting a pretty good show. My favorite Rumble would have to be the 1992 edition where “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair went the distance to win not only the Rumble but the WWF Championship as well. Besides, who could ever forget Bobby “The Brain” Heenan’s classic commentary on that match? “THAT’S NOT FAIR TO FLAIR!”

Another personal favorite is the 2006 Royal Rumble. I remember this one fondly for a number of reasons. For starters, it was one of the few WWE pay-per-views I bought and the last one I purchased before the WWE Network launched in early 2014. Secondly, I watched it with my cousin David and we both became five year old wrestling marks again that fine evening. Last but not least, it was the night before I received my massive Super Nintendo package along with 30+ games. I remember that Sunday night at David’s house like it were only yesterday. January 29, 2006. Crazy that it’s been 12 years.

It was an exciting time. I was at David’s house watching the Royal Rumble with him and knowing that my big SNES package was probably just a day away. It was just a perfect evening… one of those nights that live on forever in your soul.

2006 Rumble was when Rey Mysterio went over and began his Cinderella run to the top following the death of Eddie Guerrero.

God damn, look at all those Hall of Fame legends. It’s sad though when you think about who has already passed. Cue Dead Wrestler Beach.

Who will win the 2018 Royal Rumble later tonight? Some are saying Shinsuke Nakamura. Others are citing a returning Daniel Bryan. The safe bet may be Roman Reigns. Regardless, I look forward to another fun evening with the boys.

One of my favorite things about the Rumble? The theme, particularly from 1991-1992. Talk about childhood memories. Remember the wrestlers’ portraits flying in and out of the screen as Vince McMahon would scream their names? Classsic!

SMASH!
HAAAA-KUUUUU!
THE ULLLLLLL-TIMATE WARRIOR!!!!

ROYAL RUMBLE THE VIDEO GAME

Being huge WWF and SNES fans back in 1993, my friends and I were super hyped for WWF Royal Rumble. I remember a lot of boasting about its hefty 16 MEGS. It’s funny looking back what a huge deal was made out of games that boasted 16 MEGS. It was just a sign of the times.

I wasn’t the biggest fan of its “who can tap the fastest” gameplay system, though. Then again, I always had the slowest thumbs of my gaming group

Each WWF wrestler has a special finishing move that WWF Royal Rumble nicely duplicates. This was one of the many things missing from Sculptured Software’s initial effort, WWF Super Wrestlemania. No finisher is better than Undertaker’s Tombstone!

There are plenty of modes on hand but the main appeal is of course the Royal Rumble match itself. Up to six wrestlers can be on screen at a time. Unfortunately this game doesn’t take advantage of the multitap. So only up to two people can play, which is a shame. Luckily, Sculptured Software learned from this and made the appropriate changes to their follow-up game, WWF Raw.

Knock out the ref just like in real life WWE. This entertained the crap out of me and my friends back in the day.

Chair head shots have long been banned from the WWE, but you can still relive those glorious headbangers in Royal Rumble.

Nothing like a little cheating. Choke ‘em, rake ‘em and kick ‘em!

We had way too much fun with this back in the day.

THE WRESTLERS

Bret Hart was always one of my favorites. The Excellence of Execution was one of the best wrestlers I’ve ever seen. His 2006 Hall of Fame speech was awesome.

Crush started out in the WWF as the third member of the declining Demolition. He then turned babyface and took on this Hawaiian persona. I always liked him.

Ah, Mr. Perfect. It’s hard not to appreciate Curt Hennig. He was one of the first heels (bad guys) I can remember liking. He was just so athletic and smooth in that ring. Everything he did, he did it to perfection. And who could forget his classic manager, Bobby “The Brain” Heenan? Good times.

Lex Luger made his WWF debut coincidentally enough at the 1993 Royal Rumble. Unveiling a brand new gimmick, The Narcissist flexed and posed in front of many elaborate mirrors. This was before he became Mr. America Lex Luger with the Lex Express

My favorite wrestler of all time, Macho Man Randy Savage is the total package. Personality, charisma, mic skills and in-ring acumen. The dude had it all. “Oooh yeah, DIG IT!”

Say hello to the Bad Guy. Oozing with machismo, Razor Ramon had an IT factor unlike many other guys. Whether he was flicking his toothpick at the camera or hoisting up fools in the Razor’s Edge, Scott Hall was always entertaining as hell.

16-time world champion The Nature Boy Ric Flair is one of the few who have managed to transcend the sport of professional wrestling. The dirtiest player in the game is right at home with those eye rakes and choke holds. “WOOOO!”

The Icon. The Main Event. The Show Stopper. Mr. WrestleMania! Before Shawn went on to become all those things, he was simply Shawn Michaels. A brash up and coming youngster who quickly rose through the ranks with his superior athleticism and knack for putting on the best performance of the night. This is the beginnings of The Heartbreak Kid, even before he used Sweet Chin Music as his finisher.

The Native American made his WWF debut in 1992 and was undefeated for a great many months (nearly two years). Tatanka went 10 years between Royal Rumble appearances — 1996 was his last Rumble match until he came back 10 years later in 2006. Speaking of battle royals, Tatanka competed at the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal at WrestleMania 32 in front of over 100,000 screaming fans a few years ago in 2016. Maybe we’ll see the great Tatanka in another battle royal in 2026…

The Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiase was one of the truly iconic wrestling villains of ’80s lore. He and Mr. Perfect were my guys, so it was nice to see both of them make the cut here. DiBiase was showing his age by 1993 and his last WWF match was against Razor Ramon in a short seven minute match at SummerSlam ’93. Thanks for the memories, Ted. I’ll never forget the time you kicked that kid’s basketball. So dastardly!

THE PHENOM. The Undertaker. A mainstay in WWE for over 20 years, who knew when he made his debut back in 1990 at the Survivor Series that he would go on to become one of the biggest superstars to ever grace a squared circle. Much respect!

I always thought as a kid that Yokozuna was Japanese. It wasn’t until years later that I found out Yoko is actually Samoan. He’s part of the famous Anoa’i wrestling family, which includes the likes of The Rock, Roman Reigns, Nia Jax, Rikishi, The Usos, Umaga and many more. I hated Yokozuna as a kid. He defeated Hulk Hogan for the WWF Championship in Hogan’s last WWF match in the ’90s. King of the Ring 1993 AKA The Day Hulkamania Died.

GENESIS VS. SNES

Want to play as Mr. Perfect? Better go with SNES then

The SNES version came out in June of 1993 while the Genesis version was released in September. Each version had five exclusive wrestlers. SNES: Ric Flair, Mr. Perfect, Ted DiBiase, Yokozuna and Tatanka. Genesis: Hulk Hogan, IRS, The Model Rick Martel, Papa Shango and Hacksaw Jim Duggan (the first ever Royal Rumble winner way back in 1988).

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

WWF Royal Rumble fared pretty well with the critics. Many considered it the first viable and legitimate home console game under the WWF umbrella. It’s certainly come a long way since the days of WWF WrestleMania on the NES. EGM gave it scores of 7, 7, 7 and 7. GameFan gave it ratings of 84, 85, 85 and 89%. Super Play rated it 79%.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

WWF Royal Rumble was a definite step in the right direction as far as WWF games were concerned. Wrestlers were given their finishing moves and visuals were significantly upgraded. I guess that’s what 16 MEGS can do for ya! The Royal Rumble match is a fun novelty but unfortunately, time has not been so kind to this game. WWF Raw, which came out in November of 1994, is essentially an improved version of this game. I’ve never been a big fan of the grappling meter. I much prefer wrestling games that are based on timing rather than who can mash the buttons faster. Some fine examples of the former include the Fire Pro and Zen Nippon Wrestling games. Another thing that Sculptured Software missed the mark on here is that every wrestler shares the same moveset, sans finisher. Part of what makes wrestling so much fun is that each guy has his own set of moves unique to him. At least WWF Raw fixed this.

Tonight, the 31st Annual Royal Rumble emanates from Philadelphia. As someone who grew up loving the Royal Rumble event, I am so looking forward to it. And being that it’s Rumble season, I recently played WWF Royal Rumble for the first time in… gosh… almost 25 years. My friends and I had a blast with it back in the day but it definitely hasn’t aged so well. Back in mid 1993 when the pickings were slim, this was a good game. But now there are so many better wrestling games on the SNES alone that it renders WWF Royal Rumble a bit obsolete. It’s not bad, but it’s not really that good, either. If you absolutely have to play a WWF game on the SNES, make it WWF Raw.

Graphics: 7
Sound: 6
Gameplay: 6
Longevity: 5

Overall: 6.0

***ROYAL RUMBLE 2018 SPOILERS***

I just finished viewing the 2018 Royal Rumble and wow. I’ll be damned. WWE finally gets it right. The two Rumble matches were a ton of fun and I can’t complain about the booking. It wasn’t perfect, but it was a lot better than the past five years or so. Hats off to the guys and gals. I was thoroughly entertained.

I marked out so hard for the return of Rey Mysterio! He was the winner of the 2006 Royal Rumble which I ordered on Pay-Per-View and watched with my cousin David the night before my SNES package arrived. Fond memories and seeing Rey coming back tonight was a rush of nostalgia. Best of all, Rey can still go. Bravo!

The biggest moment though might have been Ronda Rousey. Sure it was corny and cheesy, but I loved it. Ah Royal Rumble, you did it again.

For more WWF ramblings, see WWF Memories.