Saturday Night Slam Masters (SNES)

Pub & Dev: Capcom | June 1994 | 24 MEGS
Pub & Dev: Capcom | June 1994 | 24 MEGS

Capcom could almost do no wrong back in the early-mid ’90s. They were like King Midas; almost anything they touched turned to gold. Their Street Fighter II franchise caught lightning in a bottle. In 1993 Capcom released an arcade wrestling game by the name of Saturday Night Slam Masters. Can we pause here to acknowledge that Saturday Night Slam Masters has to be one of the greatest titles for a video game ever? Who doesn’t love Saturday nights, and who doesn’t want to take control of a Slam Master? The title completely captures the carny and zany nature of the professional wrestling underworld. I loved playing the arcade game back in the day and was psyched when a Super Nintendo port was announced. Boosting 10 crazy comic book-like grapplers, the best thing about Slam Masters was its frenetic 4 player tag team bedlam mode. Yup, Saturday nights at home with the SNES and three friends was never going to be the same again.

30 YEARS BEING A WRASSLIN’ FAN

It all started here
It all started here

On an innocent Saturday night in early October of 1987, my uncle introduced me and my brother to the wacky world of professional wrestling. That night we saw Saturday Night’s Main Event. In particular, I’ll never forget that moment when Intercontinental Champion Honky Tonk Man smashed Macho Man Randy Savage over the head with his guitar. Coincidentally, one of the men holding Savage hostage there, Bret “The Hitman” Hart, was recently featured here on RVGFanatic.

The Handshake Heard 'Round The World
The Handshake Heard ‘Round The World

Hulk Hogan made the save and the two joined forces to create The Mega Powers. And on that night I became cemented as a wrestling fan for life. My fandom has been going strong nearly 30 years now, and I’ll always be a sucker for a good wrestling product. Speaking of which…

It was like witnessing the Holy Grail
It was like witnessing the Holy Grail

I’ll never forget the summer of 1994. It was such an epic summer that I wrote all about it here: The Summer of Imports. Saturday Night Slam Masters played a big role in that memorable summer over 20 years ago.

Who didn't want to use Haggar in a wrestling game?
Who didn’t want to use Haggar in a wrestling game?

Known as Muscle Bomber: The Body Explosion in Japan, Slam Masters isn’t the most technically proficient wrestling game around but what it lacks in proper technique it more than makes up for with tons of character, charm and chaos.

SATURDAY NIGHT’S ALRIGHT FOR FIGHTING

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Accompanied by a rockin’ guitar riff, the intro is short and sweet. It also sets the mood perfectly for the pandemonium to come.

THE SLAM MASTERS

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Jumbo and Scorp are considered “boss characters” and are only selectable in the tag team mode. Scorp is an absolute badass. I like all of them but as a kid I took an immediate liking to Titanic Tim. He was my man! My brother gravitated to El Stringray, the Rey Mysterio Jr. wannabe. Of course, you can’t go wrong with Haggar, either. But Titanic Tim was my favorite. As a kid I had two phrases I would always shout whenever I hit someone with Tim’s big boot or his running shoulder tackle. Hey, I was 10 ;). It went like such…

"GET OUT OF THE WAY!"
“GET OUT OF THE WAY!”
"MAKE ROOM!"
“MAKE ROOM!”

WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION

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Weapons are occasionally strewn about outside the ring in the one on one mode. Nothing satisfies like cracking someone’s cranium with a sturdy table.

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Gunloc is rumored to be the brother of Guile. One can definitely see the similarities…

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Turnabout is fair play! Gunloc finishes off the remains of the table and quite possibly Biff as well.

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Nothing gets a better laugh though than smashing someone over the head with a beer bottle!

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Perhaps you want something more traditional, though. In that case grab a chair which takes two hits to completely destroy. Love the way Haggar sells!

SINGLES WARFARE

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Modern day David vs. Goliath — not looking good for the little guy at the moment…

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Titanic Tim LAUNCHES El Stingray high into the stratosphere. Love his reaction there. Reminds me of Randy Orton cringing when he threw Samir Singh too hard…

Yikes...
Yikes…

TAG TEAM WARFARE

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Stingray’s Atomic Diver looks painful as hell, to BOTH guys.

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Haggar is pissed off and delivers his classic spinning clothesline. Stingray’s Jalapeno Comet is probably the coolest looking special move in the game.

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Alexander the Grater’s Tornado Toss is arguably the most gruesome and wince-inducing move. He tosses you high into the air, even going above the screen, before you come crashing down to the hard canvas with no give. OUCH!

HAGGAR’S REVENGE

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Haggar is pissed off at Stingray for the lack of help and takes out the little guy.

STINGRAY’S REVENGE

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Secret to beating a big bully? Recruit an even bigger one! Besides, Titanic Tim feels guilty for launching Stingray into the far reaches of outer space that one time, and is paying back the favor he owes to El Stingray. Not to mention, he’s kind of taken a liking to the little guy, if truth be told.

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Capcom absolutely NAILED the entrances. It completely captures the over the top nature of the wrestling business.

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Titanic Tim starts out by targeting Haggar, choking the life out of him. Later on, Jumbo uses his girth to put the big squeeze on the big man.

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Massive suplex! Thing of beauty.

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Haggar submits to Tim’s Torture Rack. At the end you get a classic Capcom Street Fighter-esque post fight quote. By the way, my favorite thing about the tag team bedlam mode is that it’s elimination style. Meaning you can enjoy a nice little 2-on-1 handicap match after defeating one of your opponents. It’s a total blast with 4 players!

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Taking a page out of Bret Hart’s playbook, Tim delivers a picture perfect Reverse Russian Legsweep. I love catching them from behind while they’re dealing with my tag partner. These sneak attacks are the best. Also love the impact of the mat. It sounds painful as hell.

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Getting a double 3-count pin in stereo is almost the coolest thing in this game. Check out how Grater there turns a shade of red after being defeated!

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Speaking of coolest, nothing beats this. Seeing your tag partner thwart the opponent’s attempt to save their partner in the nick of time is a fist pumping moment for sure! Close saves (both ways) create the most compelling moments in this game by far.

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Haggar is back for revenge and this time he has a new partner: Scorp. Judging by that second pic there, it’s a good call…

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Haggar’s Spinning Piledriver is absolutely devastating.

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Scorp’s Spiral Slam is just as lethal.

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Destruction personified!

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Defeat all comers and Capcom lets you do it again, Ghosts ‘N Goblins style.

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Falling face first at the game over screen always made me chuckle.

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Quotes from each wrestler appear pre and post match. It was a sign of the times.

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

Gorgeous artwork from AngusBurgers!
Gorgeous artwork from artist AngusBurgers

Saturday Night Slam Masters fared well with the critics as an arcade port. EGM gave it ratings of 7, 7, 7 and 8. Super Play rated it 78%. It’s obvious it’s best when played with 4. It takes a huge hit when playing solo, moreso than other 4 player games I feel. EGM said it best when one of their reviewers cited, “This is awesome for parties and gatherings, but not one I’d want to sit down and play all day.” I had a blast with this game back in the summer of 1994. My brother, our friends and I would all rotate having a go. It’s aged well but I’m reminded of how limited this game is, having played it recently. Yeah, it is an arcade port but you wish Capcom threw in some extra modes. It’s a straight port of an arcade game that didn’t have many bells and whistles. What you see is what you get. This worked fine with Street Fighter II, but Saturday Night Slam Masters is the CLASSIC arcade game. By that I mean it’s a lot of fun to play for a short go each time you see it in the arcade hall, but its flaws are exposed with longer sessions.

"A little help here?"
“A little help here?”

Super Play perhaps put it best:

“It’s totally atmospheric and, along with the over-the-top glitziness of each of the 10 fighters, it makes for an entertaining game to watch, if never totally satisfying to play. The problem is it’s very much an arcade experience. It’s fine to stick a couple of quid in for a laugh when you happen to come across it at the Trocadéro, for example, but it doesn’t have the gameplay or depth backing it. It’s just a matter of exchanging punches and kicks for a while, moving in for a spot of grappling, and hoping you get in there first. Sure, it may take a while to learn the special moves, and when to best apply them, but there aren’t many, and that’s as far as any strategy goes.”

CLOSING THOUGHTS

SATURDAY NIGHT'S ALRIGHT FOR FIGHTING
SATURDAY NIGHT’S ALRIGHT FOR FIGHTING

Don’t get me wrong, for all the flaws that Saturday Night Slam Masters has, I still like the game a whole bloody lot. You can’t talk about the best 4 player SNES games without mentioning this one. And if you take it for what it strictly is, you should be satisfied. It’s a crazy arcade wrestling game that places more emphasis on an arcade style than it does a pure technical wrestling style. You may come away feeling a bit cheated if you’re looking for anything beyond that. Computer AI can be very cheap, pulling off miracle comebacks and knowing your next move before you even attempt it. But it all goes back to the true nature of this game: it’s meant to be experienced playing alongside 3 pals.

"I'M THE KING OF THE WORLD!"
“I’M THE KING OF THE WORLD!”

Yes, it’s a bit shallow but as far as straight arcade ports go Capcom did a great job. Extras would have been appreciated but the graphics and sound are on par with what you’d expect from Capcom in this era. In other words, they do a good job bringing home an arcade-like quality experience. It’s by no means a deep game, so I knocked it down a point or two. It’s just a matter of hanging in there and hoping for the best, as Super Play perfectly encapsulated a bit earlier.

Get 'im, T-Hawk! Er, Titanic Tim
Get him, T. Hawk! Er, Titanic Tim

Overall, it’s a great arcade translation but it was best played in spurts with friends in the arcade, and the same applies here.

Graphics: 8
Sound: 8
Gameplay: 7
Longevity: 7

AwardOverall: 7.5
Bronze Award

 

Nice Jessica cameo
Nice Jessica cameo

Bret “The Hitman” Hart

Happy 60th Birthday, Hitman!
Happy 60th Birthday, Hitman!

Earlier this week, on July 2nd to be precise, Bret “The Hitman” Hart turned the big 6-0. That’s right. If you grew up as a wrestling fan of the late ’80s/early ’90s then you know Bret Hart was one of the key figures of the industry and remains highly regarded as one of the best wrestlers to ever lace a pair of boots. Born on July 2, 1957, Bret came from the Hart family. One of the most famous families in pro wrestling history, Bret developed his craft at a young age in the infamous Hart Dungeon where his father, Stu Hart, and his 87 brothers applied various stretch holds on the poor lad. My uncle Jimmy introduced me to wrestling in 1987 and I’ve been a fan ever since. I fell in love with the action and larger than life characters. I became a Bret Hart fan early on. It was evident that he was born to be a wrestler. They didn’t call him the EXCELLENCE OF EXECUTION for nothing!

Who could forget the Anvil's trademark laughter?
Who could forget the Anvil’s trademark laughter?

Bret began his WWF career tagging with his brother-in-law, Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart. Together they formed one of the most memorable and successful tag teams in the World Wrestling Federation. Bret’s impeccable wrestling acumen was sharply complemented by Jim’s sheer brute force. Managed by “Mouth of the South” Jimmy Hart, the Hart Foundation ruled the tag scene and soon became fan favorites.

Tag team wrestling in the '80s was so good
Tag team wrestling in the ’80s was so good

My brother and I loved Demolition, we loved the Rockers… but DAMN DID WE LOVE the Hart Foundation. I remember the highs and I remember the lows. They won the tag titles twice and we cheered. However, their shocking defeat to the Nasty Boys at Wrestlemania VII left a very sour taste in my mouth. I remember Jimmy Hart, who was then managing the Nasty Boys, gave his megaphone to Knobbs or Saggs, and they bloody took off Anvil’s head to win the tag titles. It was a dark day for Hart Foundation fans everywhere. The team split up after that when the WWF realized Bret’s potential as a major singles star. He went on to win the WWF Championship five times, before leaving the company after the infamous 1997 Survivor Series screwjob in Montreal.

Welcome home, Bret
Welcome home, Bret

In the wrestling business there’s a famous saying… NEVER SAY NEVER. After nearly 10 years of not being a part of the WWE in any fashion, Bret Hart was announced to headline the 2006 WWE Hall of Fame ceremony. It was a huge moment in the industry and for all Bret Hart fans. This was his big homecoming. ONE NIGHT ONLY. April 1, 2006. It was one of my favorite Hall of Fame speeches ever. Tonight we relive the memories of that unforgettable evening.

BRET HART’S INDUCTION VIDEO INTRO

BretHartHoF4

Alright, and now to induct Bret “The Hitman” Hart… there are some people who need no introduction. But if you don’t give this next guy one, he’ll open up a can of whup ass on y’all and I don’t want that to happen here tonight. I’d like to say a lot of nice things about this guy but… I rather be honest. He’s… [WHAT! -Audience] he is NOT a nice man [WHAT!]. As a matter of fact, [WHAT!] he is the meanest [WHAT!], he is the toughest [WHAT!] son of a bitch in the WWE… STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN!

*CROWD POPS*

But not everyone's glad to see the Rattlesnake...
But not everyone’s glad to see the Rattlesnake…
Austin walks right past Hogan, no selling it all
Austin walks right past Hogan, no selling it all
*AUSTIN-HOGAN!  *CLAP CLAP*  AUSTIN-HOGAN!*
AUSTIN-HOGAN!  *CLAP CLAP*  AUSTIN-HOGAN!

You know, I was going through my bag in the back and…

*AUSTIN-HOGAN!  *CLAP CLAP*  AUSTIN-HOGAN!*
AUSTIN-HOGAN!  *CLAP CLAP*  AUSTIN-HOGAN!
AUSTIN-HOGAN!   *CLAP CLAP*   AUSTIN-HOGAN!
AUSTIN-HOGAN!  *CLAP CLAP*  AUSTIN-HOGAN!
AUSTIN-HOGAN!   *CLAP CLAP*   AUSTIN-HOGAN!
AUSTIN-HOGAN!  *CLAP CLAP*  AUSTIN-HOGAN!
*AUSTIN-HOGAN!  *CLAP CLAP*  AUSTIN-HOGAN!*
*AUSTIN-HOGAN! *CLAP CLAP* AUSTIN-HOGAN!*

Call it a hunch but I think the crowd wants a Steve Austin vs. Hulk Hogan dream match :P. The great Mean Gene Okerlund has seen and heard it all in this great business, but even he is taken aback by this rabid fan response. The crowd is absolutely LIT here in Chicago tonight.

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You know it’s funny… I was uh, I was going through my bag in the back and I couldn’t find something. I lost something. I went in the back looking through my bag and uh, I found a can of WHUP ASS and it had Hulk Hogan’s name on it.

*CROWD POPS LIKE CRAZY*

"YOU DAMN RIGHT!"
“YOU DAMN RIGHT!”

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It’s a good night to be up here today with all these legends and uh, it’s fun for me. And it’s a great honor and I know everybody’s been saying that but I really mean it, because I ain’t the most humble sumbitch in the world.

*Crowd chuckles*

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You got the Blackjacks over here. The black trunks, the black boots, the black vests, bad attitude. If I coulda ridden down the road with you guys, it woulda been great.

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I never told Sherri this but I’ve always been in love with her. I just thought she was sexy, gorgeous and just a tremendous work — I just loved everything she did.

Sherri soaks in the adulation
Sherri soaks in the adulation

You were talking about the blondes a little bit earlier in the evening — I just love everything you did.

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A lot of people don’t know this but I traveled up and down the road with Tony Atlas. And uh, where’s that cheapskate Mick Foley, because he traveled with us.

*Crowd laughs*

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And everybody knows that Tony was a great bodybuilder, and he’s a great powerlifter, and a great wrestler too, but he’s also a great beer drinker.

*Crowd chuckles*

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And we’d ride up and down the road… he was good but he couldn’t drink as much as Stone Cold could, I’ll tell you that much right now. But we’d drink beer until the late hours of the night, and then me and Tony would go to the gym. I’d be working chest, bench pressing about 225 for about four, five reps, and Tony would be over there bouncing 500 off his chest about 10, 15 times. IT REALLY PISSED ME OFF!

*Crowd laughs*

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So it’s good to be here tonight. And uh, you know, I’m here to talk about a guy that I’ve always respected before I even knew him. And you know, I’ve always had a deep respect for the great workers in the business, the great technicians, and the great storytellers. And uh, Bret “The Hitman” Hart never was the biggest guy in the business. And Bret never was the flashiest guy in the business. But I always had an unbelievable chemistry in the ring with him. I knew that any time the bell rang there was a trust and there was a level of respect in there between us and just, good things always seem to happen. And I remember one time I was laying at the house on my couch and I was watching Monday Night Raw. Of all things I had a busted knee. And I’m listening to the announcing — this was back when Vince McMahon used to do the announcing — and it was Wrestlemania 13 right here in Chicago at the Rosemont. My favorite building to wrestle in… it’s just a magic environment. And I hear Vince go, “Yeah, and in a submission match it’ll be Bret “The Hitman” Hart vs. Stone Cold Steve Austin!” And that was news to me, because I was watching the broadcast and I didn’t know a DAMN thing about it.

*Crowd chuckles*

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And it got me kinda hot because I’m not a submission wrestler. You probably know that from watching me; I only got about three offensive moves.

*Crowd laughs*

Triple H and his wife Stephanie McMahon laugh
Triple H and his wife Stephanie McMahon laughing

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So when I showed up to Chicago that night, I remember I needed to get in shape for the match, but I had a busted knee. So I stopped drinking for about 17 days. And uh, Lanza commented on how good I looked. And I remember going to the match that night and I was thinking it was at a point in my career where I needed something big to happen. The King of the Ring had already happened, I cut a promo which kind of put me on the map, and this was kind of put up or shut up time. It was a semi-main event that night, a submission style match and I just knew that we were gonna go out there in my favorite town to work and my favorite building and completely stink the joint out. What we did was go out there and, things happened, and it was the greatest match of my career.

*Crowd claps respectfully*

16 time champion "Nature Boy" Ric Flair shows love
16 time champion “Nature Boy” Ric Flair shows love

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I’ve had a lot of great matches after that but Jack Lanza came up to me and he said, “You’ll probably never have a match like that again.” And he kinda was right, we never really achieved anything like that again. But any time I stepped into the ring with Bret, whether it was overseas or here in the States somewhere, I’ve wrestled him a million times, and Bret was a guy that always showed up. He didn’t miss his shot, now he always showed up LATE, but he never missed his shot. So I’m proud to induct him into the Hall of Fame tonight. He’s a guy that’s always called himself the excellence of execution. He lives that, he breathes that, and he truly believes it in his heart. And that’s why he was so good. He’s the best there is, he’s the best there was, he’s the best there ever will be, he’s Bret “The Hitman” Hart!

Wrestlers and fans alike stand up to cheer on Bret
Wrestlers and fans alike stand up to cheer on Bret
It was euphoric and cathartic. Nearly 10 years!
It was euphoric and cathartic. Nearly 10 years!
*THANK YOU BRET!  THANK YOU BRET!*
THANK YOU BRET!  THANK YOU BRET!
THANK YOU BRET!  THANK YOU BRET!
THANK YOU BRET!  THANK YOU BRET!
THANK YOU!
THANK YOU!
THANK YOU BRET!  THANK YOU BRET!
THANK YOU BRET!  THANK YOU BRET!

BretHartHoF33

Thank you! I just wanna say um… it’s an honor to be here and it’s an honor to be up here with so many uh great legends like everybody said. And uh… you know, nobody’s more surprised and more amazed to be here than I am. But uh, this is a big night for me.

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And despite what anyone thinks, many years ago when I had my fallout with Vince McMahon at the 1997 Survivor Series and all that, I made a promise to myself THAT DAY, that if they ever asked me to do the Hall of Fame I would be here.

Bret receives a rousing ovation
Bret receives a rousing ovation

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I wanna say that while I’ll never forget what the WWE took away from me, I also wanna say that I’ll never forget all the great things that they gave to me. And I’ve had a great great life and I’ve had a great career here. And first of all I want to thank the McMahons, especially Vince, for giving me the chance to work on his canvas.

*Fans jeer at the mention of Vince*

The McMahons, minus Vince (backstage), look on
The McMahons, minus Vince (backstage), look on

Every night that I went out years ago when I first started, I uh, I was just honored to be in the ring and wrestle for the WWE.

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You know when I think back years and years ago, when I was about uh, well three years old I think, I was watching my first wrestling matches on TV and I was watching Killer Kowalski. And uh, I think in my family everybody just became ingrained from the very start to love this business and love the circus life. My family growing up, I mean, everybody loved wrestling and we always been grateful for all the funny adventures and stories that we’ve had through this great business.

BretHartHoF39

I want everyone to know that I came here to celebrate my career, not to mourn over it. And uh, I had a fortune cookie today that said uh, “You’re welcomed at any gathering,” on my Chinese fortune cookie today.

*Crowd cheers*

The Nature Boy looks on
The Nature Boy looks on

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I want to go back to when I was a little kid. I remember going to the wrestling matches for the very first time, and I’d be riding in the car down to the wrestling matches with my brothers, and right from the very start I can remember I’d be riding in the car and my dad would pull up to the hotel and uh, I remember when I was real young they picked up the midgets.

*Crowd chuckles*

The lovely Trish Stratus
The lovely Trish Stratus

BretHartHoF43

And uh, I remember I thought “Cool, finally I got some wrestlers that I can play around with,” you know. And it was uh, I remember Sky Low Low and Little Beaver and that whole bunch, they just all get in the backseat.

Sky Low Low and Little Beaver
Sky Low Low and Little Beaver

My dad had a big stretch limo with four different rows of seats, just enough for all us Hart kids and uh, he let the midgets climb in there and they get in the back and I can remember I thought, “Great.” And I remember trying to headlock them and stuff like that.

The Sarge chuckles along with the crowd
The Sarge chuckles along with the crowd

BretHartHoF45

And if you ever uh, if you knew midget wrestlers you know that you don’t want to be headlocking them — they don’t appreciate that too much.

*Crowd laughs*

BretHartHoF46

But anyway, wrestling’s always been part of my life. I can remember my first experiences with wrestling. I was about uh, 10, 12 years old and I’d go down to the basement, and my dad had all these huge wrestlers. And I remember you were kind of safe when you were about that age — 12 you’re OK you know — you could sit down there and as long as you didn’t say anything. And it was pretty interesting to watch my dad put these guys into all these holds and they’d be screaming for their lives down there. I think my mom sometimes, I don’t know what she thought, I think she sometimes phoned the police. She was worried someone’s getting killed down there.

*Crowd chuckles*

BretHartHoF47

My dad was an amazing character and I want to say first that… I owe everything I am today to my dad. And uh, the man I always longed to be was the one I first thought my father was. He was a one of a kind guy in this business. And I can remember when I first got in, I always introduced myself around the dressing room as Bret Hart, Stu Hart’s kid, and this was always my passage to safety. Everybody I know who really understood him and got to know him loved him. He was everything that was good about the wrestling business. I know he’d be really proud of me standing here today.

*Crowd applauds respectfully*

BretHartHoF48

I uh… got all kinds of funny stories and memories. I’ll try to not go too long here. It would only be right for me to tell a few funny stories about my brother, Owen.

*Crowd cheers*

My brother Owen was uh… he was a hilarious guy.

BretHartHoF49

*Crowd chants O-WEN! O-WEN! O-WEN!*

BretHartHoF50

I remember being on the road getting a call from somebody telling me that someone from delivery service was giving me a free pizza. I think I already eaten… but they would sell me on it. It was free and bringing it up and it’s on the house. And I was like OK. And the next thing you know I would be arguing with the guy about how he wanted me to pick my toppings — what kind of toppings I wanted. And it was like OK. So I started going through the toppings and then he starts pushing more toppings on you. Then finally he tells you after all that he’s going to charge you for the toppings. And you go through this charade… anyway, that was Owen.

*Crowd laughs and cheers*

Booker T splits a side cracking up
Booker T splits a side cracking up

One time we were checking into a hotel in Dayton, Ohio. All the wrestlers were walking in and uh, “Hacksaw” Jim Duggan [HOOOOO! -Crowd] was there with his wife, and he went to his room.

"HOOOOOOOO!!!"
“HOOOOOOOO!”

We were all standing around the front desk signing in. Duggan phoned down and asked the guy at the front desk, “Where’s the gym?” The guy puts his hand over the phone and he goes, “Anyone know where the gym is?”

BretHartHoF52

And Owen goes, you know, “Give it to me.” So he hands the phone over to Owen and Owen gets on the phone and of course, Jim, Hacksaw just thinks it’s somebody at the front desk. Anyway, Owen tells Hacksaw, “Why don’t you look it up yourself, YOU LAZY BASTARD.”

Mark Henry laughs so hard he has to wipe away a tear
Mark Henry laughs so hard he has to wipe away a tear

BretHartHoF54

So Hacksaw got all worked up and Owen tells him, “If you wanna do something about it, come down here and I’ll kick your ass.”

Triple H laughs along with the crowd
Triple H laughs along with the crowd

BretHartHoF56

Hacksaw couldn’t believe it. So then Hacksaw, you know, he’s getting dressed to come down to the lobby to straighten out this front desk guy. And I remember Owen just hands the phone back to him and the guy goes, “Don’t do this to me!

Big laughs from Big Show, Sarge and Dusty Rhodes
Big laughs from Big Show, Sarge and Dusty Rhodes

BretHartHoF58

Owen goes, “Don’t worry, just tell him it’s me… Jim Powers.”

*Crowd erupts in laughter*

Batista, Lashley and Tatanka cracking up
Batista, Bobby Lashley and Tatanka cracking up

Hacksaw comes down to the lobby and the guy goes, “Hey, it wasn’t me! It was Jim Powers.”

*Crowd erupts again*

Most definitely NOT Owen Hart
Most definitely NOT Owen Hart

I remember that night in the dressing room, Hacksaw came up to Jim Powers and uh… well, that was funny anyway.

*Crowd laughs*

BretHartHoF60

If you knew Owen, I’m sure he pulled a joke on you somewhere.

The crowd cheers for Owen and a great story shared
The crowd cheers for Owen and a great story shared

BretHartHoF62

I remember in the beginning of my career I had a chance to uh… I got called and they said they needed me to take the Dynamite Kid’s place. He was going to wrestle in Madison Square Garden against the great Tatsumi Fujinami from Japan. Anyway, Dynamite Kid couldn’t get across the border and I was called up at the last minute.

BretHartHoF63

I remember I got to the building — this was such a big thing for me… I was only about 20, 21 — and I remember I was walking through the lobby getting ready for that big walk over to Madison Square Garden and I kept thinking to myself, “One day I get to tell my kids that I wrestled in Madison Square Garden.”

*Crowd claps respectfully*

BretHartHoF64

Anyway, they met me, the Japanese guys that brought me in for this. They stopped me in the lobby and they said, “We have to take you off the card. You don’t have a big enough name to wrestle in Madison Square Garden.” And I remember that in the beginning of my career…

BretHartHoF65

When I first got to the WWE in 1984, I was fortunate and lucky enough to be a part of this new surge in wrestling thanks to Hulk Hogan, Vince and the whole team of wrestlers that took wrestling to a whole new level.

*Crowd claps*

BretHartHoF66

Back in those days wrestling was pretty tough. I worked 304 days my first year and I think I worked pretty much close to that for the next six years that I was in the WWE. Double shots. It was a tough life. But I want to say I would never have made it through those years if it hadn’t been for my tag team partner, Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart.

*Crowd pops for The Anvil*

Good ol Jim Neidhart
Good ol’ Jim Neidhart

BretHartHoF67

Jim Neidhart was you know, he was just the greatest character. I got a little pug over in Italy right now that I keep just because I think he reminds me of Jim. He’s got those sad puppy dog eyes you know, and he always wants you to have one more round.

BretHartHoF68

I got so many funny memories and stories of Jim Neidhart, but I’ll just tell one. I remember Owen had just flown in; I think he was getting a new start with WWE back in 1991, maybe. We just did one night in Texas — I worked with a guy named Skinner. Anyway, all the wrestlers were kind of celebrating and I took Owen to a strip bar in San Antonio…

*Some fans scream YEEEEAAAAH!!*

BretHartHoF69

Owen wasn’t really prone to those kind of places but I managed to talk him into it because it was a big night for him. He was starting back in WWE and he’d flown in from Germany. And it was a crazy night, that night in Texas, I’ll tell you that much. We were all drinking in the bar and everyone’s kind of talking and stuff…

Next thing you know I see Vince walking in...
Next thing you know I see Vince coming in…

*Crowd laughs*

Sarge remembers that night all too well
Sarge remembers that night all too well

And Vince had a few soda pops somewhere else. He was primed and ready that night. I bet Sergeant Slaughter remembers this — he was driving, thank God.

*Crowd laughs*

BretHartHoF72

But anyway, I remember just kind of hanging out in the bar with Owen. And Hulk, you know, he could always stir up shit, you know.

*Crowd laughs*

Hulk Hogan looking GUILTY AS HELL
Hulk Hogan looking on GUILTY AS ALL HELL
Animal from Legion of Doom reminisces along
Animal from Legion of Doom reminisces along

He was stirring up the Legion of Doom. Hulk got them all worked up. And I remember Hawk and Animal were talking about how they were going to do their finisher on Vince.

*Crowd erupts in laughter*

Doomsday Device is no joke!
Doomsday Device is no joke!

BretHartHoF75

And I remember watching it and I’m thinking, “No way. They’re not gonna do it. Nobody would do their finisher on Vince.”

WWE CEO, Vincent Kennedy McMahon
WWE CEO, Vincent Kennedy McMahon

And um, next thing I know I see Hawk saying he’s not kidding and Animal’s kind of going along with it. Quite a few of the wrestlers were starting to mark out over this, and see if it’s gonna actually happen.

*Crowd laughs*

Jim's pulling on the beard  *crowd laughs*
Jim’s pulling on the beard  *Crowd laughs*

BretHartHoF76b

BretHartHoF77

Anyway, next I see Animal come up behind Vince. And like I said, Vince was already in a pretty good state of mind. So Animal came up from behind and he hoisted Vince up. I look and there’s Hawk right there on the little table with the poles.

*Crowd laughs*

The Road Warriors, AKA Legion of Doom
Hawk and Animal (Road Warriors AKA Legion of Doom)

And uh, I’m waiting. I’m watching. I’m thinking, “Here it is… they’re gonna take Vince’s head off.”

*Crowd laughs*

BretHartHoF78

Hawk came off the table with a little powder puff clothesline and I remember Hulk, Beefcake and everybody kind of caught Vince and set him down. I think they even gave a little golf clap.

*Crowd laughs*

BretHartHoF79

And I remember I had a beer in my hand. I think I had a shot of Jack Daniels. And I can see Jim pulling on his beard. He goes…

"HART FOUNDATION WOULD HAVE DONE IT!"
“HART FOUNDATION WOULD HAVE DONE IT!”

*Crowd laughs and cheers loudly*

Shelton Benjamin busts up
Shelton Benjamin busts up

BretHartHoF81

I remember thinking, “I better get the hell out of here.” I couldn’t set my drinks down fast enough. I told Owen, “Listen, I gotta get out of here RIGHT NOW.” Next thing you know, Jim’s got Vince up in the bear hug position…

Set up for the Hart Attack
Set up for the Hart Attack

*Crowd laughs*

I remember Hulk looking at me like, “So… what’s gonna happen here?”

*Crowd chuckles*

The Hulkster cracks a grin while reminiscing along
The Hulkster cracks a grin while reminiscing along
Was Bret really going to take the boss' head off?
Would Bret really do it?
Anyway, I took Vince's head off
Anyway… I TOOK VINCE’S HEAD OFF

*Crowd erupts*

Hart Attack to Vince!
Hart Attack to Vince!
Ric Flair dies laughing. Thankfully, not literally
Ric Flair dies laughing. Thankfully, not literally

BretHartHoF85

Jim Neidhart… I remember so many funny stories about him. I can’t resist telling this one. Whenever we stayed at a hotel we would always forget to put the “Do Not Disturb” sign on the doorknob. We’d be lying there in bed and I can hear the maid fumbling with the key to come into the room. I’d be sound asleep and I remember just sort of hearing Jim pull the whole blanket off, and just be lying there like a big old starfish.

Drax the Destroyer and his lady enjoy a good chuckle
Drax the Destroyer and his lady enjoy a good chuckle

BretHartHoF87

And then you see the maid come in. I mean, we went through this quite a few times. It was standard Hart Foundation. You hear them scream and run out of the room as fast as they could. Over a period of time I think we could do it in stereo, you know. Anyway, I wouldn’t be where I am if it wasn’t for Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart.

BretHartHoF85b

*Laughter and applause*

BretHartHoF88

There’s a lot of wrestlers I wanna take the time to thank. In my early days, I’ll never forget Cowboy Bob Orton, Roddy Piper, Don Muraco, Mr. Fuji, Iron Sheik and so many others that uh, every night, they were my family. And uh, I love those guys. I had some uh… *Fan interjects, “ONE MORE MATCH!*

Huh, we'll see
Huh, we’ll see…  *Crowd pops*

“ONE MORE MATCH!
ONE MORE MATCH!
ONE MORE MATCH!”

BretHartHoF90

I wish. I wish I could have one more match. I wanna take the time to uh, think about and remember some of my great matches and great experiences I had. I’ll never forget the matches I had with Mr. Perfect, Curt Hennig.

*MASSIVE POP*

BretHartHoF92

He was uh, he was just the greatest guy to work with every night. I never looked at working with him as work. It was a night off. He was just the greatest guy to work with every night. He was just so much fun and he was so safe and so careful. And I miss him.

BretHartHoF91

I remember wrestling Curt Hennig in Anchorage, Alaska. It was sold out and I remember it was a big crowd. Andre was working in those days with Warrior, and they were going about 25 seconds every night.

*Crowd laughs*

Not exactly workhorses...
Not exactly workhorses, these two…
Austin laughs along with the sold out crowd
Austin laughs along with the sold out crowd

BretHartHoF94

So they needed some extra time, you know, for someone to do the work out there. I was working with Curt that night, and I don’t think I ever had a bad match with him, but I remember that night we uh, we just had such a beautiful match that I’ll never forget it.

*Respectful applause*

Legendary IC title bout at Summer Slam 1991
Bret Hart’s epic coming out party (SummerSlam 1991)
Their King of the Ring 1993 match was great, too
King of the Ring 1993 match was great, too

BretHartHoF95

Another guy I wanna tell you a story about is Earthquake.

*Crowd cheers*

Earthquake, you’re in my prayers.

Wherever you are out there I hope you’re doing OK.

*Crowd applauds*

He sadly passed two months after Bret's speech
Sadly, he died two months after Bret’s speech

BretHartHoF97

I remember we were flying from Columbus up to Seattle or something, and we had about a six in the morning flight. I remember we got delayed for hours and everyone was sleeping on the floor near the gate. It took hours and hours. And everyone was really tired and really cranky. We finally got off and we’re in the air on our way to Seattle. Poor Earthquake, he was in the very last seat in the airplane. You know, he was a big guy so he was against the wall sleeping with his head down. I remember going to the back of the plane to use the bathroom, but someone was already in there. And uh, Jimmy Hart was across from Earthquake, and I was talking to Jimmy.

BretHartHoF98

Anyway, this little black kid came up and he was about four or five years old. He wanted my autograph and I remember I signed it for him, and then he asked Jimmy to sign it. And then he looked over at Earthquake and he goes, “Should I wake this guy up?”

*Crowd laughs*

BretHartHoF99

Jimmy Hart goes, “Yeah go ahead.” I say, “Yeah, he’s a pussycat.” But Earthquake had a long day, you know, he had about enough. I remember this kid pulling on his coat like “Hey hey!”

BretHartHoF100

And I remember Earthquake just looked up, and his eyes were like red holes. He yelled at the little kid and told him to GET OUT. So then he put his head back down…

I remember the little kid looked around like this...
I remember the little kid looked around like this…

BretHartHoF102

… and he just leaned back and I couldn’t believe it, he just slapped Earthquake as hard as he could right on the forehead.

*Laughter and gasps ensue*

*OH NO HE DIH-ENT!*
*OH NO HE DIH-ENT!*

BretHartHoF104

And I remember Earthquake, good thing he had a seat belt on, he tried to explode out of that seat. And I remember Jimmy Hart was trying to find a place to hide and I remember I kept praying whoever’s in the bathroom better come out, you know.

*Crowd laughs*

Jimmy Hart recollects that memory as well
Jimmy Hart recollects that memory as well

Anyway, as you can tell I had a life filled with all kinds of characters, and great stories and memories… and uh…

*Fan shouts, THANK YOU BRET!*

You’re welcome.

*Applause*

BretHartHoF106

I wanna say that everything I did and accomplished in wrestling I did it for my kids. Everyday, you know, you get up and it’s not the easiest thing in the world to go out there all the time and entertain everyone else’s kids. It seemed like birthdays, Christmas, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Easter, you’re just always entertaining somebody else’s kids, and you’re always packing your bags. Your kids pay the ultimate sacrifice. I just want them to know that everything I did, I did it for them.

*Respectful applause*

Bret's kids (and Nattie Neidhart) look on
Bret’s kids (and Nattie Neidhart) look on

BretHartHoF108

I remember a few months before “THE SCREWJOB”

*Fans boo vehemently*

The Montreal Screwjob
The Montreal Screwjob (1997)

I uh, I was trying to put my youngest son, Blade, to bed. It was in the summer time. I ordered him to go to bed and he went up. I remember he got really mad, and he’s got a pretty bad temper anyway.

"Yo dad, quit throwing shade on me will ya?"
“Yo dad, quit throwing shade on me, will ya?”

BretHartHoF110

He was slamming doors and making quite a fuss. I remember finally putting him in his room. I went back downstairs and I was sitting in my kitchen. Like half an hour later, all of a sudden I see Blade come down. And he’s got on Shawn’s t-shirt.

*Collective gasp*

Shawn's hat  *GASP*
Shawn’s hat…  *GASP*

BretHartHoF112

And he’s got the Shawn glove and he’s looking at me like this and he’s opening his hand.

*OOOOOOH!!!*

I said, "So, what are you supposed to be?"
I said, “So, what are you supposed to be?”
He looks at me and he goes, "I'M IN THE CLIQUE"
He looks at me and he goes, “I’M IN THE CLIQUE.”
*Crowd laughs along with Blade*
*Crowd laughs along with Blade*
The Clique: Shawn, Triple H, Nash, Hall and Kid
The Clique: Shawn Michaels, Triple H, Nash, Hall and Kid

BretHartHoF116

I still put him to bed. I remember telling Shawn that story. But uh, you know, when I think back to those days of the Hart Foundation… with um, Brian Pillman…

*MASSIVE POP for Pillman*

BretHartHoF117

Jim Neidhart, The British Bulldog, Owen…

*Crowd pops*

Those were the happiest days of my life.

And I uh, I always look back on those days with a real deep fondness.

The Good Old Days
R.I.P. Pillman, Owen and Bulldog

BretHartHoF118

And I was lucky — I wouldn’t be where I am today if it weren’t for the great fans I’ve got all around the world. If I could give any advice to all the young wrestlers out there: never forsake your fans. Never forget them. Because if he’s a fan of yours, you’ll want to hold on to them for as long as they’ll take ya.

*Applause*

I wanna say that I was a real world’s champion. I traveled around the world, and uh, I was really proud to be a world champion. I wrestled in India, Israel, South Africa, the Philippines. I wrestled in so many places. And Germany, I wanna say a special thank you to all the fans I had in Germany. I remember they knocked down the barricades just to come up and give me a big hug before my match, or after my match. It was a beautiful experience that I’ll never forget. They were probably the most loyal and devoted fans I ever had. Canada, you know… I was always a Canadian first. I never ever forgot where I came from.

BretHartHoF119

People always say why would you wear pink? Pink was a very special color for me. If you mix a little red and white together, you get pink. Sometimes I thought maybe I should have had a better color throughout my career. Maybe black and gold or something would have been a little nicer. But you know, there was something very neutral about pink as a color. I always said it took a real man to wear pink. Pink can be whatever you want it to be. And I uh, I love the color pink.

*Crowd chuckles*

BretHartHoF120

I’m getting ready to close but I wanna say that uh… to the wrestlers… you need to pace yourselves for the long haul. And it’s not so much about hurting one another. It’s about respecting the art.

*Applause*

I wrestled for 23 years, and it’s not easy to go out there every night and describe yourself as the best there is, the best there was and the best there ever will be. But I wrestled 23 years and I never once injured one wrestler ever. That I know of, anyway. And I was a pretty physical wrestler. And the whole business is about trust and respect. And there’s a deep meaning behind the words, “Doing the honors.”

BretHartHoF121

I wanna thank every wrestler that I ever worked with anywhere around the world. And in closing, um, I want to thank my wife in Italy. When I had my stroke a couple years ago, I remember I got emails and letters from fans all around the world saying they were praying for me. And they must have been praying good because I was lucky and fortunate enough to have been blessed with a great recovery. And I’m standing here today.

*Applause*

BretHartHoF122

If I didn’t have the recovery that I had, then I would never have met the sweet angel that saved me over in Italy. She’s over in Italy now with my pug and I just wanna say hi to her. Cinzia, thank you for being my angel.

And uh, I wanna thank everybody for all the great memories. Wembley Stadium, all my fans in England…

BretHartHoF123

That was my favorite match that I ever had, and I’m happy to tell you that. And I wouldn’t change that minute, that moment for anything.

SummerSlam 1992 saw an epic Bret-Bulldog match
Wembley Stadium was the site of SummerSlam 1992
Bret and Bulldog put on a clinic
Bret and Bulldog put on a masterful clinic

BretHartHoF124

I guess I’m gonna wrap up here but I just wanna say that uh, to all the wrestlers and everyone around the world, if I could give only one message to them it would be this. “The best chance you have if you want to rise to the top is to give yourself up the loneliness. Fear nothing, and work hard. One thing you’ll discover is that life is based less than you think on what you’ve learned and much more than you think on what you have inside you right from the very beginning.”

BretHartHoF125

And I’m happy to say that uh, you don’t have to worry about me anymore. I’m good, I’m happy to be alive, I’m glad to be here. And I thank each of you for coming out here tonight. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

Bret Hart receives a rousing send-off
Bret Hart receives a rousing send-off

BretHartHoF127

You can go home again, after all
You can go home again, after all

CLOSING THOUGHTS

BretHartHoF129

The pink and black attack.

The excellence of execution.

The best there is.

The best there was.

The best there ever will be.

WWF50

Whatever you want to call Bret, he was a wrestler for the ages. His Hall of Fame speech still gives me goosebumps to this very day. Although I was never in the wrestling business, there is a strange nostalgic bond I have with these crazy larger than life characters. Even though they don’t know me, I feel like I somehow know them. They almost feel like distant uncles you only see every other Christmas. I guess that’s why I still follow wrestling today. Not as religiously as I once did, mind you, but I’ll always follow the product and be a fan for life. Always looking for that chance to jump out of my chair and mark out like I’m five years old again watching Hulkamania reign supreme. The WWF (now WWE) has given me many fond memories over the years. Whether you like or dislike pro wrestling, there exists a special brotherhood and fraternity within wrestling circles. You see it clear as day through Bret’s stories. Every week these guys and gals go on the road, traveling thousands of miles, sacrificing their bodies, their families and more. To all the wrestlers out there, and especially to Bret “The Hitman” Hart, thank you for everything. Through all the ups and downs I will forever be a fan.

For life!
For life!

The Amazing Spider-Man: Lethal Foes (SFC)

A Spider-Man game exclusive to the Super Famicom
A Spider-Man game exclusive to the Super Famicom

Today marks the official release of the highly touted superhero film, Spider-Man: Homecoming. It’s only fitting to review one of his many SNES games. But which one? Well, I’m going to go with an obscure Super Famicom only title that not too many are aware of. Most of us retro gamers know that there were five Spider-Man games released on the Super Nintendo. Few know about the Japanese exclusive The Amazing Spider-Man: Lethal Foes. Before we take a closer look let’s quickly run down the five more well known Spider-Man games on the SNES.

Spider-Man/X-Men: Arcade's Revenge
Spider-Man and the X-Men
Spider-Man
Spider-Man
Maximum Carnage
Maximum Carnage
Separation Anxiety
Separation Anxiety
Marvel Super Heroes: War of the Gems
Marvel Super Heroes

ASMLF

Marvel Comics proudly presents…

ASMLF1

HE’S YOUR FAVORITE…
HE’S MY FAVORITE…

ASMLF2

[Wait, what?! -Ed.]

ASMLF3

Sorry, Spidey. Let’s try this again.

ASMLF4

[Do those even exist any more? -Ed.]

ASMLF5

Nope, you can’t.

Alright, on with the show. The Amazing Spider-Man: Lethal Foes features nine short stages.

Gee, can it be any smaller?
Gee, can it be any smaller?

[That’s what she said -Ed.]

Because he can cling to any wall he touches, Spider-Man feels a bit sticky. Each button is put to use. The web attack is very small and there seems to be an odd delay. This is especially discernible when shooting in mid-air.

Still, the web shooter has its moments. Just don’t ever use it during boss battles — it’s way too slow leaving you exposed. The bosses also have a sixth sense regarding the web shooter. Before you can barely raise his wrist, they’re on Spider-Man like white on rice. The web attack should have been better implemented but it does prove effective where speed is not a factor.

Useful here
Useful here
As well as here
As well as here
Unlike Mega Man...
Unlike Mega Man
... he can shoot up
… he can shoot up
Why hello there
Why hello there
Love to chat but gotta run
Love to chat but gotta run

OTHER MOVES IN THE PLAYBOOK

Eat your heart out, Tarzan
Eat your heart out, Tarzan

The shoulder buttons send Spider-Man to the air: L for left and R for right. It’s fun to toy with but honestly other than the first level you can get by fine without it.

Flying Shoulder Tackle
Flying Shoulder Tackle
Uppercut (Are You Conners!)
Uppercut (Are You Conners!)
Cling to surfaces
Cling to surfaces
Crawl under tight spots
Crawl under tight spots
"SHHHHHH!"
“SHHHHHH!”
The trusty ol' boot
The trusty ol’ boot
He's stickier than sticky rice
He’s stickier than sticky rice

His tendency to cling on to any surface makes him a bit sticky at times but I guess one could argue it’s more authentic this way. It certainly makes for a slightly cumbersome playing experience, though.

ASMLF21ASMLF21b

 

 

 

 

 

Spider-Man stays trim by breaking into brisk jogs.

ASMLF22ASMLF22b

 

 

 

 

 

Spider-Man’s pain threshold allows him to incur a lot of damage.

Lots of cameos throughout
Lots of cameos throughout
When did he learn Japanese?
When did he learn Japanese?

So it looks decent, eh? Unfortunately, some flaws hamper the experience.

  • As mentioned, Spider-Man is a bit sticky. At inopportune times he can cling to unwanted spots. This results in wrestling with the controller to get him back on track. Some cheap hits may occur during this process
  • The enemy roster is lacking in both quantity and quality
  • The timer forces the player to rush through the levels, giving one little time to enjoy the various sights and sounds. The levels are short to begin with, so the timer only makes the game that much shorter. The timer doesn’t reset when you meet up with the boss so you REALLY have to rush through the levels, or else pay the penalty of the timer expiring. It’s unnecessarily lame if you ask me
  • The boss battles are of the “mindless press attack rapidly” variety. I was quite disappointed with the lack of imaginative and stimulating boss fights. On the higher difficulty levels the AI is ridiculously cheap, too

Speaking of the bosses, here’s the first five:

Beetle
Beetle
Lizard
Lizard
Mysterio
Mysterio
Smythe
Smythe

ASMLF30ASMLF30b

 

 

 

 

 

GREEN GOBLIN! One of my favorite Spider-Man foes.

ASMLF26ASMLF26b

 

 

 

Shout-out to Lizard!

The levels contain your standard fare clichés seen in many other action titles. The portal set pieces in level 3-2, however, displayed the kind of absorbing creativity I was hoping the rest of the game would have.

ASMLF31ASMLF31b

 

 

 

 

 

First, you must kick the switch to activate the door above. Move it — the door doesn’t stay open for long!

ASMLF32ASMLF32b

 

 

 

 

 

Shortly thereafter, a second portal appears. Spider-Man is no dummy, however. His spider senses inform him this second portal is a bit shady. And he’s right. Touch the second portal and you’re whisked right back to the first one.

ASMLF33ASMLF33b

 

 

 

 

 

ASMLF33cASMLF33d

 

 

 

 

 

Granted, this is nothing new but it’s these little moments that I enjoy in these sort of games to break up the cookie cutter tedium. I just wish there was more of this in Lethal Foes.

It had potential to be special
It had potential to be special

My favorite level is the second stage. You’re dumped into a sewer maze littered with multiple passages. Some are dead-ends with money or health bonuses. Others are dead-ends with enemies waiting to pounce on you. The rest will take you toward your goal of reaching the exit. Due to the open-ended chaotic nature of the sewer stage, Lethal Foes suddenly became a lot more thrilling and gratifying to play.

This was also the only stage where I didn’t mind the time limit. It made it that much more of a tense stage. For the other levels designs, however, the timer didn’t work for me and just ended up as a negative.

It’s a real shame, then, that the game’s level design fluctuates so wildly. A great game has an engaging and captivating design throughout, but especially moreso as the game progresses. Well, I’m not sure what happened here. Some levels make you cheer quietly in your seat while others sadly have you scratching your head wondering if the developers just wanted to call it quits.

For example, in one stage Spider-Man goes through a park. It’s all linear. All you do is walk right, beat up the odd villain here and there, and finally it’s the boss. And it’s yet another “punch him rapidly” affair. What gives? Why is one level so fun, like the Sewer, and the next so dull, like the Park? Due to such a dramatic swing, you wonder what could have been if the game had better level design consistently throughout.

Therefore, I think you all know where I’m going with this. Lethal Foes is a mixed bag. You take the good with the bad. If you’re a hardcore SNES and Spider-Man fan then you’ll certainly find some merit here. However, don’t explode it to rock your world. It had a lot of potential but ultimately falls way short. Still, not a bad game at all.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

So much for my homecoming
So much for my homecoming

Someone on the internet over a decade ago once called Lethal Foes “the best 2D Spider-Man game ever.” I’m not nearly as impressed. The developer, Agenda, could have fleshed out certain ideas better to keep players more enthralled. More frames of animation, more imaginative boss fights and smoother control would have gone a long way. Lethal Foes could easily have been a “hidden obscure gem” but it just doesn’t have the remarkable playability to back it up.

I think I am turning Japanese...
I think I am turning Japanese…

But for all the negative points I raised, I like Lethal Foes in a guilty pleasure sort of way. It doesn’t break any new ground but it plays just well enough to be enjoyable.

But really there are so many action titles out there that are better AND easier to obtain, so classify Lethal Foes under the “For diehard fans and collectors only” file.

Catch Spider-Man: Homecoming out in theatres NOW!

Your Friendly Neighborhood Nintendo Man

HomecomingPoster

Spider-Man: Homecoming hits theatres tomorrow on July 7, 2017. The masked superhero has a famous saying: “Your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.” It’s a perfect time to share a Nintendo story from my youth. It’s a story that’s going to be featured in Jeffrey Wittenhagen’s upcoming Nintendo book. Thank you Jeff for allowing me the honor to be a small part of another one of your great books. To all my readers here on RVGFanatic, here’s my story in full below! :)

Chilling right before the feature presentation :D
Chilling right before the feature presentation :D

YOUR FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD NINTENDO MAN

NESFamily

I’m instantly bombarded by a tidal wave of memories whenever I think about the 8-bit Nintendo. Like so many others, I grew up on the NES in the late ‘80s. Born in 1983, I was just old enough to appreciate the NES when it started hitting its stride in North America circa 1987. I have fond memories of all those lazy carefree Sunday mornings spent playing the likes of Contra, Mega Man 2 and Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! just to name a few. Nintendo help made my childhood fun and memorable. Back then gaming was a brand new experience to me. There were no fancy 3D graphics, no complex controller layouts and no lengthy 10 minute tutorials to sit through. The NES gave you two buttons; all you had to do was press start and you were good to go. Sometimes simplicity can’t be beat. There aren’t a lot of bells and whistles — the NES is proof that a game doesn’t have to be overly fancy or complicated in order to be great.

Contra
Contra
Mega Man 2
Mega Man 2
Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!
Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!!

My uncle bought a Nintendo for me and my brother in 1987. I still remember the humble collection we managed to amass through the years…

Double Dragon
Double Dragon
Double Dragon II
Double Dragon II: The Revenge
Duck Hunt
Duck Hunt
Dynowarz
Dynowarz
Gotcha!
Gotcha!
Karnov
Karnov
Kung Fu
Kung Fu
Legendary Wings
Legendary Wings
Mighty Bomb Jack
Mighty Bomb Jack
Robo Warrior
Robo Warrior
Solomon's Key
Solomon’s Key
Super Mario Bros.
Super Mario Bros.
Super Mario Bros. 3
Super Mario Bros. 3
Tag Team Pro Wrestling
Tag Team Pro Wrestling
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
WWF WrestleMania
WWF WrestleMania

My childhood is filled with fond memories of myself, Uncle Jimmy and my brother Kevin switching off for hours on end as we sat glued to our television set playing the latest NES titles. Hell, the NES was the ORIGINAL Nintendo “Switch.” After all, those halcyon days were all about switching off with my brother and uncle on Contra as we attempted to save the universe on a nightly basis back in the summer of 1989. Hanging out with my uncle and brother blasting alien scum to Kingdom Come was some of the greatest times of my childhood.

Gotta kill 'em all!
Gotta kill ‘em all!

Another fond memory I carry with me were all the rental stores that populated my area. There had to be a good 10 video stores all within a 30 mile radius back in the late ‘80s where I lived. From the established titans of the industry (Blockbuster) to all the little quirky mom and pop shops, it was an entertainment mecca with more goodies than you could watch or play to cover the span of ten lifetimes.

My actual childhood Hollywood Video!
My actual childhood Hollywood Video!

My favorite store of the lot hands down was Evergreen Video. I blame Evergreen Video and its owner, Tom, just a common man working hard for the American dream, as the source that corrupted me. One day in the late ’80s my dad was driving me and my brother around. We spotted Evergreen Video by chance when we made a pit stop in a small plaza to pick up a few items. I had never seen Evergreen Video before but on that day there it stood. Its big bold green letters silently called out to me and my brother, beckoning us over. We found ourselves breaking into a brisk stroll as we made a beeline for the store, our legs suddenly on a mission of their own.

The renting craze began that fateful day
The renting craze began on that fateful day

I can still hear the little chime that rung each time someone entered the store. It was a quaint shop with lots of family videos. You were immediately greeted upon entry by four tall wooden shelves that began near the entrance and ended close to the register counter, which sat roughly 60-70 feet straight ahead. Two columns of towering tan shelves rested on each side of the store, freeing the middle aisle for a clear walk to the counter and a good look at the man who owned the store, Tom. Rocking brown rimmed spectacles and a beard like it was 2014, Tom became something of an uncle figure to me and Kevin. You would often find Tom invariably sporting a flannel shirt of one kind or another. In fact, he was the spitting image of Al Borland (played by Richard Karn) from the ‘90s TV sitcom, Home Improvement, only with glasses.

Tom looked a lot like Richard Karn with glasses
Tom looked a lot like Richard Karn (with glasses)

Up front and to the right sat a small wooden shelf. There Tom kept his collection of 30-40 NES games. Tucked away in a corner, it was this little heavenly nook that my brother and I always made a mad scramble for every Saturday afternoon. The smell of the oak wood shelves permeates to this day. If there was ever a quintessential mom and pop rental store, Evergreen Video surely was it.

Evergreen's NES selection was quaint but inviting
Evergreen’s NES selection was quaint but inviting

Tom worked there every Saturday afternoon, rain or shine. And no matter what, we could always count on seeing his big smile greeting us behind the register counter whenever he saw us trampling in. I still remember some of the games I rented from Evergreen Video…

Beetlejuice
Beetlejuice
TMNT II: The Arcade Game
TMNT II: The Arcade Game
Totally Rad
Totally Rad
Werewolf
Werewolf: The Last Warrior

… just to name some. Back then there was no YouTube or anything to really scope these games out. You basically rented them on a whim based on the cover art and how cool the back of the box looked. It made for hit and miss rentals and some crazy times. You just never knew what you were going to get. In some regard it was almost like the Wild Wild West back then!

Some boxes look great but the game, not so much
Some boxes look great but the game, not so much
I was a sucker for them bright yellow covers!
I was a sucker for them bright yellow covers!

There was a certain purity to those days that I miss. The same can be said for the purity that courses through the 8-bit veins of the NES itself. Timing is everything in life — the Nintendo and the late ’80s simply went hand in hand and everything else that came along with it, including mom and pop shops.

NESSystem

Tom was so good to us; he even held games for me and Kevin. My brother would call and ask for a game and if Tom had said game then he would hold it for us. I remember him telling us once, with a big smile, “Only for you guys.” Maybe he said that to every kid customer of his, but damnit I like to think he meant what he said. And I don’t doubt that he did because that’s just the kind of guy Tom was.

He always served with a smile
He always served with a smile

There’s one story in particular that I’ll never forget. One time we came in to pick up TMNT II: The Arcade Game. We met Tom’s son that day. He was playing the game on the small TV that sat behind the register counter. I felt so bad when he was forced to turn the game off just so we could rent it. He was on the snowfield level battling the wolf boss, Tora. I remember Tora flashing and blinking red as Tom told his very own flesh and blood, “Sorry but these boys need to rent the game now.” I’ll never forget the poor kid looking absolutely crushed, wanting to carry on like any TMNT loving kid would, but he respected his dad far too much to disobey. I always felt guilty about that! Tom had this incredible knack of making me and Kevin feel like we were part of his family. It was top-notch service the likes of which you can’t buy. The kind of genuine service you can only find at a mom and pop shop.

Man I still feel guilty about it!
Man I still feel guilty about this!

Being huge fans of Double Dragon II, Kevin and I couldn’t wait for Double Dragon III. When it finally arrived in early 1991, my dad took us to Evergreen Video to rent a copy. The drive home was filled with visions of spinning roundhouse kicks and crazy throws galore, but alas, when we popped the game in it refused to play for some reason. My dad promptly called Evergreen Video to inform Tom about the situation and Tom told us to come back for a no-frills exchange. We ended up picking Battletoads as a replacement rental. While we were disappointed that we couldn’t play the eagerly anticipated Double Dragon III, we made the most out of that weekend. More importantly, Tom’s great customer service and integrity once again shined like a thousand stars shimmering in the night sky.

Good times. Hard times too
Battletoads kept us entertained

But here’s the part that blows my mind. A few weeks later we made our usual Saturday afternoon trek to Evergreen Video. Tom surprised us when he revealed a brand new copy of Double Dragon III — reserved just for us! He said he was waiting on us to come by because he knew how disappointed we were that his previous copy didn’t work. He wanted to make things right, but he already did that with the Battletoads exchange. It exemplifies the kind of upstanding man Tom was. He always went above and beyond the call of duty. If Yelp existed back in 1991, Evergreen Video would have gotten 5 stars all day! As for Double Dragon III, let’s just say some sequels disappoint.

Bittersweet memories...
Bittersweet memories…

Early 1992 was an interesting time. There was a changing of the guard. You could feel the shift in the winds, and you could see the writing on the wall. The 8-bit NES was being phased out for the brand new 16-bit Super Nintendo. And with it, Evergreen Video. Business wasn’t booming for Tom in early 1992 as it was in the late ’80s. When the Super Nintendo came to the US in late 1991, Tom bought some SNES games to keep up with the times. I rented Ultraman and sadly that was the last game I would ever rent from Evergreen Video. The beginning of one era (the SNES) marked the ending for another (Evergreen Video).

The end of an era
The infamous last game I rented

One innocuous Saturday afternoon in early 1992 my dad took me and Kevin to Evergreen Video to return Ultraman. Unfortunately, that trip proved to be our last. Tom told us he and the family were moving on. But because I was so young I didn’t really grasp his heartfelt admission. I just assumed he would still be there next Saturday and the Saturday after that. Because it’s Tom. And that’s what Tom does. After all, he’s your friendly neighborhood Nintendo man.

EGVUM

But reality crushed me when my mom took me shopping in that same plaza a week later. I stole a glance inside the remains of Evergreen Video. What was once a simple but lovely store that provided me with so many good memories was now a broken, fragmented shell of its former glory. A part of me expected to still see the wooden shelves and Tom’s friendly mug situated behind the register counter. Instead, what I found that day was an empty store torn down in shambles, the floor littered with debris. I felt like crying as I peered in through the glass pane. I lost a little bit of innocence that day. From that moment on I forever realized that things don’t last forever, no matter how much you want them to.

A harrowing sight indeed
A harrowing sight indeed

The last time I visited that plaza was June 2008. I had just graduated from college with a teaching credential. My cousins wanted to celebrate the occasion by eating at a Chinese restaurant. Of all the places they could have chosen, of course it had to be at a restaurant in that small plaza near the defunct remains of Evergreen Video. But of course. It was a surreal night. I just graduated from college and was looking forward to the future. But returning to that childhood plaza for the first time in what had to be over a decade got me far more emotional than I thought possible. After dinner my cousins declared a movie night at their place. But having unfinished business, I told them I would drop by later. As they drove off I stood outside the restaurant all by my lonesome. I slowly turned my gaze to the classic spot where Evergreen Video once proudly stood ages ago. My heart started racing as I knew what stood before me: I was on the verge of facing a huge part of my childhood for quite possibly the last time ever. I knew what I had to do…

"Man, where does the time go, Doc?"
It was a surreal night. Unbelievably surreal

The building was vacant. I peered inside as memories came flooding back. I saw a montage in my own mind playing. Rushing in, pushing the door open, hearing the chime of the bell and being greeted by Tom’s friendly smile. Making a beeline for the NES games, admiring the art on the boxes and hoping you would pick a good game to play for that weekend. All those images flashed in my mind one after the other. And then I was snapped back to reality. I said a quick silent thank you to Tom. Turning my back to the store, I stood there for a minute to take in the cool early evening air.

Taking it all in
Taking it all in… one last final time

I reminisced about the past while also eagerly anticipating the future. I had just graduated and was on my way to achieving my childhood dream of having my own classroom, my own students to teach and to be a positive male influence in their lives. Not unlike how Tom was to me all those years ago in his own unique way. Alas, as the final shards of sunlight pierced the storefront, I decided that was enough reflection for one night. Placing my childhood memories back in the box, I texted my cousins that I was heading over and made my way to my car. I stole one last glance at the place where Evergreen Video once stood tall and proud. I gave Evergreen Video one final knowing nod as the engine roared. The night was still young… and so was I.

There was an eerie stillness to the night
Farewell, Evergreen Video. Thanks for the memories

That fateful June evening of 2008 was the last time I visited that small plaza where Evergreen Video once stood. It’s crazy that it’s been nearly 10 years since I’ve been back to that area. I’ve since gone on to fulfill my dreams of becoming a teacher. I like to think Tom, wherever he is, would be proud of me. To this day I have no idea where he is or even what he’s up to. I never knew his last name. It’s been over 25 years since I last saw the man. It’s sad to think there’s even a chance he may no longer be alive. But wherever he is, in whatever state or space, I hope he’s doing well and at peace.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

"... well, it was nice meeting ya"
Happy trails, Tom

Tom was a uncle figure to me and Kevin growing up, and Evergreen Video became much more than a mom and pop video store. It was a connection and bond held between strangers turned family. A bond that formed much like the bond that video games can help forge between people from different walks of life. And the NES certainly did that. Whenever I think back to my childhood, I invariably think about the NES, Tom and Evergreen Video. It was a different era. A simpler time. I’m grateful that I got to experience gaming’s golden age growing up. I wouldn’t have it any other way. Long live Nintendo, and long live the memories of Tom and Evergreen Video.

Check out Jeff's book for even more NES stories!
Check out Jeff’s book for even more NES stories!

Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! (NES)

Everyone has a plan 'til they get punched in the mouth
Everyone has a plan ’til they get punched in the mouth

It’s hard to fathom that come this October, Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! will turn the big 3-0. Wow, where does the time go? Growing up, my brother and friends adored Mario. Don’t get me wrong — I loved the Italian plumber myself, but when it came to the NES it was always about three games that truly cemented me as a gamer for life. Contra, Mega Man 2 and of course, Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! I recently reviewed the sequel, Super Punch-Out!!, so it’s only fitting to return to the original and remember why it’s arguably the greatest boxing video game of all time.

LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLE

The Man, The Myth, The Menace
The Man, The Myth, The Menace

We came for Mike Tyson. We stayed for Little Mac.

MTPO1

Co-starring Carl Otis Winslow!

#mychildhood
#mychildhood

MINOR CIRCUIT

MTPO2

Ah, Glass Joe. Nintendo’s greatest jobber.

MTPO3

Joe’s facial expressions are priceless.

MTPO4

Love seeing that spit flying out!

MTPO5

Mario moonlighting as a ref was so cool.

MTPO6

Von Kaiser is a big step up from Joe.

MTPO7

Earn stars for Mac’s Super Uppercut.

MTPO8

23-13? About to go 23-14.

MTPO9

Dodging like a smooth criminal.

MTPO10

Control is crazy on point.

MTPO11

Knock off his mustache!

MTPO12

Piston Honda was serious business.

MTPO13

So intimidating the first time you see him!

MTPO14

Snapping his massive head back felt so sweet.

MTPO15

Piston’s infamous flurry of jabs.

MTPO16

He polishes it off with a gigantic uppercut.

MTPOEx

Love the way he back peddles before falling.

MTPOEx1

Looks like Paul Bunyan with those huge feet!

MTPO17

Ah, the classic training sequence.

MAJOR CIRCUIT

MTPO18

Don Flamenco has a face you just want to punch.

MTPO19

He gave off such a douche and creep vibe!

MTPO20

Give him that electrocution hair.

MTPO21

One of my childhood friends looked like King Hippo.

MTPO22

King Hippo’s defense is top-notch.

MTPO23

Until it isn’t. Classic moment!

MTPO24

One knock-out and he’s done for.

MTPO25

Great Tiger used to give me fits.

MTPO26

Love how his eyes bug out when you drill him.

MTPO27

His teleportation trick was a bit trippy.

MTPO28

Look for his turban to flash…

MTPO29

One of the all-time great NES villains!

MTPO30

Such an imposing sight the very first time!

MTPO31

Did this feel good or what?

MTPO32

He’s got buggy eye syndrome, too.

MTPO33

The Bull Charge is such an iconic move.

MTPO34

As was the counter for it!

WORLD CIRCUIT

Note: You’ll have rematches with Piston Honda and Don Flamenco in this circuit. However, I’ll skip showing them again even though they are slightly tweaked to be more difficult second time around.

MTPO35

Soda Popinksi. What an all-time great name!

MTPO36

He scared me as a kid…

MTPO37

He always whupped my ass.

MTPO38

“Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream.” He’ll be glad to.

MTPO39

Enjoy this while you can.

MTPO40

He’s a tough bastard!

MTPO41

He’s no Randy Savage, though.

MTPO42

They just keep getting bigger and bigger.

MTPO43

Watch out for his Macho Spin Punch.

MTPO44

Whew!

MTPO45

A NES rite of passage.

MTPO46

Making it this far was impressive alone.

MTPO47

Hey, he’s not so bad…

MTPO48

Yeah, right. Gotta be super fast!

MTPO49

Arguably the most intense NES final boss battle.

MTPO50

You were a legend if you could beat Tyson legit.

MTPO53

My brother’s friend was able to make it to Tyson on a few occasions. Just getting to Iron Mike was an accomplishment in and of itself. Being able to land a few blows was enough to earn you a couple high fives. Tyson is very fast and very hard to hit, let alone knock out. If anyone ever did, they became a gawd damn legend. No one in my group could ever do it, and it wasn’t for a lack of trying. Tyson terrorized many Nintendo kids growing up in the ’80s. He’s the stuff nightmares are made of.

MTPO54

Show him who’s boss, Mac!

TELL ‘IM, DOC LOUIS!

MTPO51

In-between rounds Doc Louis will give you tips.

MTPO52

Gotta love the added damage to the avatars!

CLOSING THOUGHTS

Mike-Tyson-Punch-Out-Cast

Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! is one of my favorite NES games of all time. I love the 8-bit Nintendo but if I were to be perfectly honest a large portion of its library has not aged well. To be frank, some have aged downright terribly. However, Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! stands the test of time even nearly 30 years later. From the huge sprites to the different strategies one must adopt from fighter to fighter, there’s no denying this is one of the all-time classics. A truly great game never goes out of style. No matter how much time passes by, it remains as playable and fun as ever. Few games can claim that. This game can. It’s always hard to admit when a childhood favorite fails to live up to standards. In this case, there are thankfully no nostalgia goggles. Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! is still a TKO even three decades after its initial release. That says it all, really.

OVERALL: 9.5

Whisper sweet nothings into my ear, Doc
Whisper sweet nothings into my ear, Doc
Rock on Rocky, er, Little Mac
Rock on Rocky, er, Little Mac

Super Punch-Out!! (SNES)

Pub & Dev: Nintendo | October 1994 | 16 MEGS
Pub & Dev: Nintendo | October 1994 | 16 MEGS

When the Super Nintendo came out in 1991, many people eagerly awaited the souped up 16-bit sequels of their favorite 8-bit NES classics. And for the most part, one by one, they poured in. The first was Super Mario World, then you had the likes of Contra III, Super Castlevania IV, Mega Man X, The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, Super Metroid and the list goes on. But where was our beloved Little Mac? Finally, in October of 1994, the excruciatingly long wait was over. We were at last gifted with Super Punch-Out!! It proved to be a great game that was worth the wait.

MAC’S COMEBACK (IN AMERICA ONLY)

SNESClassic

Nintendo recently announced their upcoming release of the SNES Classic Edition. Of the 21 SNES titles on offer, Super Punch-Out!! made the cut for the American release. It’s interesting to note the Japanese version picked another game in place of Super Punch-Out!! Actually, there was never a Super Famicom version of Super Punch-Out!! ever released. I guess Japan is sticking to their guns. It’s strange but true. I have no idea why but it’s certainly their loss.

PUNCH-OUT!! MEMORIES

Hello, dear old friend
Hello, dear old friend

If you grew up in the ’80s then you probably had an 8-bit Nintendo or at the very least you knew of a friend who did. For me and many other kids, growing up in the ’80s meant a steady diet of NES, TGIF and WWF. It was Mario and Hulk Hogan. Contra and Randy Savage. Mega Man and “The Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase. Castlevania and The Ultimate Warrior. Glass Joe and “Iron” Mike Sharpe! Yup, you can’t talk about the best NES games from the ’80s without mentioning Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!!

Holds up well 30 years later!
Holds up well 30 years later!

Nintendo made us wait for Super Punch-Out!! but hey, they did give us fair warning at the end of the NES game. Not sure how many eagle-eyed gamers caught their “hidden” message but they didn’t lie — they held up their end of the bargain.

[Boy, please -Ed.]
The April 1 date made most think this was a joke

[Boy, PLEASE -Ed.]

ROUND TWO… FIGHT!!

Some of your old favorites are back!
Some of your old favorites are back!

They say your past has a way of catching up with you. Mac finds this to be true as some of his old ring “buddies” are back for another go. I wish Piston Honda and Soda Popinski made the cut as well but I get the need for new blood. At least we got Bald Bull, Mr. Sandman and Super Macho Man. It was like seeing a dear old friend, er, or bully in this case. Not that I know what it was like to be bullied growing up. Of course not. Yes… of course not. [Right -Ed.]

Defeat these 12 and you unlock four more
Defeat these 12 and you unlock four more

I guess King Hippo must be enjoying retirement, eh? I’m not the biggest fan of these new boxers — Gabby Jay is just a cheap Glass Joe knockoff with none of the charm — but I am a fan of Piston Hurricane and Masked Muscle. They’re great additions to the roster while the others felt a little too gimmicky for my taste.

SupPO1

SupPO2

SupPO3

NO LONGER STAR GAZING

Make the pain rain, Mac man!
NO STARS, JUST BARS!

In the NES game you receive a star for counter attacks, landing a swift blow and so forth. This acted as your rite of passage to using “super punches.” In this game things run a little differently. Once you fill up your meter, you’ll have access to all the special punches your heart desires… so long as you don’t get hit. I like this change.

MINOR CIRCUIT

GabbyJay

Sprite_gabby_jay

Gabby Jay is the SNES version of Glass Joe. Hell, he even graduated from Glass Joe’s School of Boxing. Why anyone would pay top dollar to be trained by arguably the worst professional boxer ever is beyond me, but Gabby Jay does have one win to his name. His victim? Who else but Glass Jo(k)e. At 1-99, the 56 year old Gabby Jay doesn’t have much left in the tank. Then again, he didn’t have much even when he was in his physical prime. Might as well hand him his 100th loss then maybe he’ll retire. Jay opens each fight with a pathetic war cry of “YAY!”

Jays having a stroke
Is he having a stroke?
All day, Jay!
All day, Jay! ALL DAY
Gabby Jay? More like Gabby Joke
Gabby Jay? More like Gabby Joke

BearHugger

SpriteBHThe heaviest boxer you’ll face, what he lacks in boxing technique he makes up for with a punch that packs a mighty wallop! Originally a carpenter, Bear Hugger grew up sparring with the animals in the forest near his home. His pet grizzly bear was his closest rival until he left Saskatoon to begin his pro career. Though not the best, he’s a major step up from the Gabby Jays of the world.

Dont bother punching him in the ponch
Useless punching his belly
Look out, Mac!
Look out, Mac!
Ducking is new
Ducking is new
Lets see...
Let’s see…
... what you had for breakfast!
… what ya had for breakfast!
No more Mario moonlighting as a ref. Sigh
Sadly, no more Mario moonlighting as a ref. Sigh

PistonHurricane

Sprite_piston_hurricaneAfter losing his home to a terrible storm, Piston Hurricane took his anger out on the mean streets of Havana. He soon became known and revered as “The King of ‘Vana.” Nobody dared to even look at him the slightest wrong way. Legend has it he once knocked out his own mom for looking at him funny. Turns out mama had gas. So just imagine what he’ll do to you!

Hes a bit childish
Peek-A-Boo, I kill you
Piston brings the punches to the party
Piston brings the punches to the party
Time to spike that punch!
Time to spike that punch!
Hell test your dodging skills
You’re no hurricane…
Not even a CATEGORY ONE hurricane!
Not even a CATEGORY ONE hurricane!
King of Vana huh?
“King of ‘Vana” huh?
Youre just a couir
You just a court jester in my world!
Go back to being the Queen of 'Vana!
“Go back to being the Queen of ‘Vana!”

Knocking out your opponent silly and watching him fly back to his corner is one of the game’s pure joys. It also gives you a breather — madly tap the buttons to recuperate any lost health in classic Punch-Out!! form.

"Better luck next time, PUSSY HURRICANE!"
Better luck next time, Pussy Hurricane

Though sometimes they don’t get up, granting you the right to gloat and taunt like no tomorrow. Camera flashes abound and the crowd cheers. It definitely nails down the big fight atmosphere.

BaldBull

Sprite_bald_bullTruly one of the most iconic villains in Nintendo history. There are many memorable bad guys in 8-bit gaming history but my two favorites were Abobo and Bald Bull. Universally beloved, it just wouldn’t be Punch-Out!! without Bald Bull as the champion of the first circuit. Not being his first rodeo, some boxing pundits claim his best years are behind him and that he’s more reputation than dominance at this point…

Not as fast as he once was
Not as fast as he once was
Still got the biceps though
Still got the biceps though
C'mon Old Yeller
Come on, Old Yeller!
Time to take you out back...
Time to take ya out back…
... and put you down for good!
… and put you down for good!
Really? This again?
Really? THIS again?
Can't teach an old bull new tricks
Can’t teach an old bull new tricks
"Welcome to 1994, bitch!"
“Welcome to 1994, bitch!”

The infamous “Bald Bull flat on his belly” look. You know you love it. Don’t feel sorry for him. He’s had a heck of a career. But now is the time for the new generation.

Congrats, Mac!
Congrats, Mac! Love the celebration animation
Quit the excuses. Bald Bullshit, more like
Quit the excuses, old timer. Bald Bullshit, more like

I like the detailed stats you get at the end of each fight. Gone is the round system. Instead you get 3 minutes to duke it out. Some prefer the old style but I didn’t mind this too much. I do miss the funky little tips Doc Louis would give Mac in-between rounds, though.

30 seconds, Bull? How the mighty have fallen
30 seconds, Bull? How the mighty have fallen

The battery backup memory records the top 8 times. The NES game didn’t have this. It was fun to try and top your best time. Funny how addicting trying to shave half a second off your best time is.

In addition, whole circuit points are recorded
In addition, whole circuit points are recorded

These little touches add to the game’s longevity.

SupPO34

MAJOR CIRCUIT

BobCharlie

Sprite_bob_charlieBob loves to juke and jive. In fact, back home he was crowned the “Jive King” of Kingston. Now he’s in the States looking to make a name for himself. Speaking of names, he’s rumored to be boxing under an assumed name but no reporter has dared question him since the, ahem, Columbus incident. Tony Ellis, you’re in our thoughts and prayers for a speedy recovery…

He's not drunk
Don’t fall for his mind games
Nice try, pal!
You’re gonna have to try better than that!
"JIVE TO THIS!"
“JIVE TO THIS, SUCKA!”

Bob Charlie may seem to be drunk but the bastard knows what he’s doing out there. Unfortunately for him, you’re no ham-and-egger (R.I.P. Bobby “The Brain” Heenan). THIS ONE IS FOR TONY ELLIS, DAMNIT!

DragonChan

Sprite_dragon_chanThe Major Circuit’s youngest boxer, scouts are impressed with Dragon Chan. Only 22 years old, he quickly ascended the ranks of the boxing universe. He makes for a terrible interview, though, since he speaks not a lick of English. Pain, however, is universal. Trained as a kick boxer, Dragon Chan is infamous for pulling into his bag of tricks. If you thought Bob Charlie to be a little unconventional, you haven’t seen anything yet my friend!

Whoa, when did this become MMA...
Whoa, when did this become MMA…
Be ready to duck!
Hidden Dragon, Peking Duck [HAR HAR -Ed.]
Dragon Chan is quick on his feet
Dragon Chan is super quick on his feet
Perhaps I spoke too fast
Perhaps I spoke too fast

MaskedMuscle

Sprite_masked_muscleMasked Muscle follows the classic Punch-Out!! tradition of big beefy boxers imposing enough to make you contemplate a change of careers. Take a steroid-injected masked wrestler, slip on a pair of gloves, give him a purple mist dirty attack and you have instant magic. Muscle was banned from pro wrestling for spewing a lethal mist into his opponents’ eyes that caused permanent eye damage. He’s one tough hombre!

His patterns are fun to counter
His patterns are fun to counter
He forces you to use both fists
He forces you to use both arms
Are you sneezing or dabbing, bro?
Bro, are you sneezing or dabbing?
Rumor has it his skull contains a metal plate
Rumor has it his skull contains a metal plate
I hope you're wearing your cup
I hope he’s wearing his cup…
IT'S THE DEADLY MIST!
IT’S THE DEADLY MIST! PURPLE RAIN!!!
If the mist catches you...
If the mist catches you…
... this is the not so pleasant result
… this is the not so pleasant result
THIS AIN'T WWE
GO BACK TO WWE, SON
Go back to Lucha Underground!
“Tell Vinnie Mac to suck it!”

MrSandman

Sprite_mr_sandmanClassic Mr. Sandman returns from the NES game. He looks superb in 16-bits, eh? The first seven boxers are easy to dispose of but Mr. Sandman is the first real challenge for newbie players. With his mighty powerful punches and near mythical aura, Mr. Sandman confidently reigns as champion of the Major Circuit. There’s a reason why some call him “Chocolate Thunder.” He might make you call him daddy!

Time to put your big boy pants on
Time to put on your big boy pants, Mac
His punches are dynamite if  they connect
His punches are dynamite if they connect
Beware the quick left jab
Beware the quick left jab
Now you got his attention
Now you’ve got his full attention
To the left to the left
To the left, to the left
To the right to the right
To the right, to the right
YOU MUST NOT KNOW 'BOUT ME!
YOU MUST NOT KNOW ‘BOUT ME!

I COULD BEAT YOU IN JUST A MINUTE!

Ahem, um, sorry about that. Mr. Sandman takes Mac to the distance but David slays Goliath in the end. Look at all that spit coming out of his mouth. Love the attention to detail! You had a heck of a run there, Sandman, but this ain’t the ’80s anymore. It’s time to graduate to the World Circuit and take out another old friend… Super Macho Man!

WORLD CIRCUIT

AranRyan

Sprite_aran_ryanAran was teased and bullied for his name growing up. Being scrawny didn’t help. He skipped college and instead devoted his time to lifting weights and he picked up boxing along the way. As his muscles developed so did his boxing skills. Known for his unrelenting scrappiness, Aran Ryan now takes out his childhood angst on anyone standing across the ring from him.

Block the body blow
Block the body blow
Block your money maker
Not the money maker
He's a tougher Piston Hurricane
He’s a tougher Piston Hurricane
No four leaf clover's going to help him
No four leaf clover will help him
I got your Lucky Charms right here
I got your Lucky Charms right here
Watch out for his debilitating squeeze
Watch out for his debilitating squeeze
I don't swing that way, pal
I don’t swing that way, pal

HeikeKagero

Sprite_heike_kageroAt just 19 years old, Heike Kagero’s future is bright but he has already established himself with a respectable 14-8 pro record. Rumor has it Heike dabbles in the occult, and that his hair is actually the spirit of a samurai protégé who died far too young centuries ago. Mind you, that’s just a rumor. But those who have been whipped by Heike’s hair will tell you differently!

 

Beware the hair!
Beware the hair!
That boy ain't right...
That boy ain’t right…
Heike reminds me of the zebra Battle Beast...
He reminds me of the zebra Battle Beast

MadClown

SpriteMCMad Clown wasn’t always a clown, and he wasn’t always mad. In fact, he had a budding career as an opera singer. But on the biggest show of his life, he froze on stage. From that point on he ran to the circus but it wasn’t long before they rejected him on account of mental instability. That’s when he turned to boxing. There he excelled. His trick? Pretending his opponent is one of the audience members who laughed at him!

 

Mad Clown brings his circus tricks with him
He’s brought his circus tricks with him
Don't dodge left or right here or else
You mad, bro?
He didn't take too kindly to that question
He didn’t take too kindly to that question
Evade this by ducking
Someone needs a hug
Or a stiff jab to the chin
Or better yet, a stiff shot to the chin
Nice try Bear Hugger, er, Mad Clown
Mac’s cardio game is on point
Time to send Bear Hugger...
Time to put Mad Clown down
See ya Twinkle Toes!
See ya, Twinkle Toes!

SuperMachoMan

Sprite_super_macho_manAfter all these years Super Macho Man’s reign of terror still sits atop the world of boxing. Well, of the World Circuit, anyhow. But don’t tell Super Macho Man that unless you want a couple black eyes. Owning a stellar record of 29-3, his only blemishes came at the hands of the Bruiser twins and an upset victory by Little Mac way back in 1987. The time for the rematch has finally come!

 

Was Mac's 1987 victory just a fluke? You decide!
Was Mac’s 1987 victory just a fluke? You decide!
The most intimidating curtsy you'll ever see
Most intimidating curtsy of all time
His Super Macho Punch is devastating
Super Macho Punch!
Be ready to duck
Be ready to duck
Oh so satisfying
His face there reminds me of…
But maybe that's just me
But maybe that’s just me!
Here comes the pain
Here comes the pain
OUCH
OUCH
DOWN GOES MAC!
DOWN GOES MAC! DOWN GOES MAC!
Macho launches into a flurry of punches
Macho launches into a flurry of punches
Show him your footwork, Mac!
C’mon, my grandma’s faster!
I can do this all day
Really, that all you got?
Someone needs a nap. Let me help!
Someone needs a nap. Let me help!
Good luck, Mac
Good luck, Mac

SPECIAL CIRCUIT

NarcisPrince

Sprite_narcis_princeYou can’t see it there but Narcis Prince (what a fitting name) has a V on his sweater. People who tease him that it stands for virgin end up in the hospital. The V actually stands for victory. He’s a promising young boxer who shot up the ranks quickly. Narcis showed so much potential that he was promoted to the legendary Special Circuit — a circuit renowned for featuring only the best of the best. He throws a fit whenever you punch him in his “beautiful” face. Hey punk, it’s boxing. What do ya expect?!

That V is for victory all right
That V stands for victory all right

HoyQuarlow

Sprite_hoy_quarlowHoy Quarlow (what a name) hobbles to the ring with his trusty wooden cane. But rather than setting it aside, he brings it into the ring to whack you upside the head with. What kind of shady organization is running this thing, eh?! At 78 years old Hoy has forgotten more about boxing than you’ll ever learn. Bearing more than a passing resemblance to Yoda, Hoy was appropriately known as “The Beast From Beijing.” Though he may not look it in his ripe old age, he can still knock out fools with the best of them! And then he’ll get the senior discount at the local Denny’s down the road. Because that’s how Hoy Quarlow rolls.

I don't want any of your wood!
I don’t want any of your wood!

RickBruiser

Sprite_rick_bruiserThe Bruiser twins rule the boxing world. Rick Bruiser is universally regarded as the second best boxer of this generation. His one loss came at the hands of his twin brother, Nick Bruiser, in a main event that broke the all time Pay-Per-View sales record. It was a fierce and close battle that many historians have touted as the greatest boxing bout in the annals of history. Rick is as menacing as they come. The deadly southpaw once decimated Bald Bull in under a minute and Bald Bull has been “broken” ever since. Mr. Sandman barely made a dent in this war machine and Super Macho Man quickly learned his place in the pecking order. If by some miracle you’re able to get by Rick, what’s left of you will be easy pickings for the even tougher Nick Bruiser. Damn. The Bruiser twins were born to dominate and destroy.

Maybe it's time to settle down...
Mac sees his life flash before him

NickBruiser

Sprite_nick_bruiserThe Undisputed Champ. Nick Bruiser is the ultimate boxer. No empathy, no emotion. Just a stone cold killer. Boosting a perfect 42-0 record, boxing pundits often argue who would win between “Iron” Mike Tyson and Nick Bruiser. Opinions differ but consensus says Nick Bruiser would ANNIHILATE Tyson. It’s hard to argue. Bruiser strikes fast and hard. The mere sight of him alone is enough to psych out most boxers. Bruiser’s aura is damn near MYTHICAL — he often beats opponents long before the bell sounds. Only one challenger can give him a run for his money, and his name is Little Mac. Bruiser scoffs at the very idea but deep down in his black heart he knows the threat that Little Mac presents. The Boxing Match of the Century has been signed. Who will win and be the Undisputed WVBA Champion? Only you can decide!

Long live the king, Rick Bruiser
Long live the king, Nick Bruiser

CLASS OF 1994

SupPO96

This ad gave us a chuckle or two
This ad gave us a chuckle or two

TIME ATTACK

Be immortalized forever (or until the battery dies)
Be immortalized forever (or until the battery dies)

The time attack mode records your fastest times and highest scores. It’s a sweet additional mode that the 8-bit NES game didn’t have.

Was there any doubt? [There was ONLY  doubt -Ed.]
I just wish Doc Louis was here to witness it
Once you beat all four circuits, the game’s longevity relies on coming back to the time attack mode to set new highs. It’s always a good time stopping Bald Bull dead in his tracks during his Bull Charge. Or sending Mr. Sandman to the dream world myself. This isn’t the kind of game you play for hours on end. But it’s the kind that you are likely to occasionally play when you only have 15 minutes and want something quick and fun. At least that’s how Super Punch-Out!! is for me.

Beating a record by one tenth of a second
Barely beating a record is incredibly thrilling!
What can I say. I'm pretty good... [PLEASE -Ed.]
What can I say. I’m pretty good…
I set the world record!
I set the world record!

Believe it or not, I’ve beaten Super Macho Man in under 8 seconds. Look and see for yourself if you don’t believe me. The previous world record was 0’09″43. I submitted this shot to Nintendo for posterity but for some weird reason unbeknownst to me they’ve rejected my submission. Well, either that or they lost it in the mail. Alas, we’ll never know… [You are more delusional than Gabby Jay -Ed.]

MAC ‘N CHANGE

Did you know this was his original look?
Did you know this was his original look?

There was a debate going around that the Mac in Super Punch-Out!! is not the same Little Mac from Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! Actually, it is. In fact, this was his original look before Nintendo changed it. You can see that clearly is the Little Mac we all know and love. However, I guess they wanted to make him look a little bit “cooler” hence the change. Personally, I don’t mind. I still like the final product we got with regards to Little Mac. Besides, it’s mostly just cosmetics we’re talking about here. The gameplay delivers and that’s mainly what I care about. Still, it’s fascinating to recall the difference between Mac’s first form and what he eventually became.

From Nintendo Power Magazine, Volume 63
From Nintendo Power Magazine, Volume 63

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

YES, GAMEFAN, MY BODY IS READY
YES, GAMEFAN, MY BODY IS READY

Super Punch-Out!! was very well received by the majority of fans and critics alike. While more people seem to prefer Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! on the NES, very few have deemed Super Punch-Out!! as anything less than a great game in its own right. It graced the cover of GameFan (and what a cover it was) for their October 1994 issue. GameFan’s signature character, the Postmeister, stood in Mac’s place. A bit of a glory hog, that one. EGM gave it ratings of 79% and 86% (given by their two sports game writers as opposed to the traditional four person review panel). GameFan rated it 90, 95 and 95%. Super Play Magazine scored it at 90%. Little Mac’s return was an unequivocal success. Better late than never!

EGM ranked it as the 56th best game of all time
EGM ranked it as the 56th best game of all time
I was miffed EGM didn't give it the traditional review!
I was miffed EGM didn’t give it the traditional review!
I was even more miffed at this somewhat low score :P
I was even more miffed at this somewhat low score :P
Preach, Super Play, PREACH!
Preach, Super Play, PREACH!

CLOSING THOUGHTS

Bald Bull never looked better!
Mac and friends never looked better!

There will always be a special place in my gaming heart for this franchise as well as for Little Mac and all his crazy foes. Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! was one of my favorites back in the late ’80s. So I couldn’t wait for the inevitable 16-bit “Super” treatment. It was a longer wait than any of us expected, but just like “make up presents” in early January it’s a classic case of better late than never. Nintendo was wise to mix in the new blood along with the return of some old familiar faces. Seeing Bald Bull, Mr. Sandman and Super Macho Man in 16 glorious bits was a welcomed sight and a tremendous fan service. The jump from NES to SNES made for a major visual upgrade. You can actually see the bulging muscles and watch the spit fly out of a guy’s mouth as you twist his head back with a well-timed uppercut. The visuals have a real arcade-like quality to them. Speaking of which, did you know there’s actually a 1984 arcade game of the same name? Navigating an older and bigger Mac through the boxing ranks presents a certain nostalgic charm, even if Nintendo did alter his look a bit. Best of all, Little Mac controls like an absolute dream. It’s crisp and super responsive. If you mess up, you know it’s on you and not the game.

HOW RUDE! Cover up when you sneeze next time, jeez!
HOW RUDE! Cover up the next time you sneeze. Jeez!

In addition to the three old faces, there are lots of new foes to scout and take out. You’ll have to learn all their techniques, such as Masked Muscle’s paralyzing purple shower. It all adds to the wacky fun. There’s just something special and sacred about a Punch-Out!! game. Maybe it’s the larger than life boxers. Maybe it’s the comic book-like zany brutality of it all. Maybe it’s figuring out the patterns and tendencies of each new competitor and then exploiting their weaknesses. Or maybe it’s simply a timeless classic from the golden days of retro gaming. I like to think it’s all of those things, along with, of course, the fact that I think all of us can relate to Little Mac in some form or fashion. We all love a good underdog story and I believe there’s a little Little Mac inside each of us. It’s David vs. Goliath, good vs. evil, you against all odds. There’s something simple and beautiful about that. And Super Punch-Out!! captures that feeling to a tee. Each opponent gets progressively tougher and nastier. By the time you reach the Bruiser twins you’ll feel like you’ve been through the trenches yourself!

A classic never goes out of style
A true classic never goes out of style

There are a few blemishes to note, though. Seeing a few more familiar faces would have been nice, especially Piston Honda. Many fans prefer the villain roster of the 8-bit original, claiming the 16-bit roster to be not quite as memorable. Fans have argued over the years about which they like better. The NES one is better overall I think, but there’s something to be said about the 16-bit treatment of Punch-Out!! that took the game to new heights graphically and really brought home an arcade-like quality. The SNES game eliminated the three round format (with breaks in-between where you get tips from Doc Louis) and instead features one round lasting three minutes. I do prefer how the SNES version tracks your knock-out punches (full meter vs. earning stars) and you had four different knock-out punches in Super Punch-Out!! as opposed to just one in the NES game. The Bruiser brothers are brutal but they’re definitely no Mike Tyson in terms of sheer difficulty. By the way, did I mention the awesome battery-backed capabilities of the SNES game, allowing you to store top scores and compete among friends? Oh, but did I mention the legend that is SODA POPINSKI? It’s like being forced to pick your favorite child. I love both games for different reasons. You simply cannot go wrong with either!

WERE BACK!
These childhood terrors have aged like a fine wine

All in all, Super Punch-Out!! is no doubt a Super Nintendo classic. It’s aged very well, too. I still love playing it even to this day. Whether you prefer the NES or SNES version, there’s no denying Super Punch-Out!! is a worthy sequel. Having more boxers, seeing ol’ Doc Louis and having some cutscenes would have been great, but I’m more than satisfied with what we got. This is one of those games I envision myself playing well into my twilight years when I’m as old as Hoy Quarlow himself, God willing. Boxing games rarely get better than this. Now if you’ll excuse me, I got me a couple Bruiser bros to beat up… ;)

Graphics: 9
Sound: 8
Gameplay: 9
Longevity: 8

Award4Overall: 9.0
Gold Award

 

Finally beat both Bruisers after all these years!
Finally beat both Bruisers after all these years!

MAC’S FINAL COMEBACK!

Somewhere in the Bronx, New York...
Somewhere in the Bronx, New York…

It was a cold and dark night in the Bronx. An old bulldog roamed the streets. If you looked close enough, you’d recognize him as Little Mac. Yes, that fabled boxing teen heart throb from the vaunted ’80s. Made a comeback in ’94 and then disappeared into obscurity. Mac is now in the second half of his life and on this night, something stirs deep within his core. A feeling he hasn’t felt in over 20 years…

The rumble in the basement...
The rumble in the basement…

The knees are feeling good. The joints are working. The back’s never felt better in years. Was it possible? Could it be? Could Mac return to the ring for one last shot at glory?

There was an eerie stillness to the night
There was an eerie stillness in the cool night air

It felt like the calm before the storm. Mac’s old trainer, Doc Louis, couldn’t believe it. Mac didn’t tell Doc explicitly, but Doc knew. He had seen that look in Mac’s eyes before. The very same look that Mac had right before he knocked out the likes of Bald Bull, Mr. Sandman and yes, even the brutal Bruiser twins. The Mac man is hungry, and he wants one more fight. One more chance to shine under the bright lights and recapture a flicker from the past.

This place was once vibrant. Analogy... ?
This place was once vibrant, teeming with life

Mac and Doc got back in the car and drove around town. One by one, they stopped off at each of Mac’s old haunts. Mac peered inside the store as though he were peering down his very soul.

"You ready to go yet, Champ?"
“You ready to go yet, Champ?”

Then they headed over to the old pet shop on 4th Avenue. It was where Mac got his first pet fish. Poor Freddy. He only lived six weeks, as Mac recalls it.

Mac: *sniff*

Doc: Hey Mac, you crying?

Mac: Uh, no. No no.

Doc: Looks like tears to me, Mac.

Mac: C’mon Doc, you know I got allergies.

Doc: Of course.

"Man, where does the time go, Doc?"
“Man, where does the time go, Doc?”

Mac: Damnit Doc, look at this will ya? This is where I grew up. I remember my mom buying me a Nintendo and some boxing game back in 1987. Those were the good old days. Lot of memories here, Doc. You know they say if you live in a place long enough, you are that place…

Doc: I ain’t no talking building. Listen, enough yapping. I gotta get your old ass ready for the Sandman!

Mac: You know what to do. Time to take that ancient bike of yours out of storage.

"Man, its just like the old days, Doc!"
“Man, it’s just like the old days, Doc!”

Just like old times, indeed. Doc’s training regimen was legendary in the ’80s and ’90s. Tonight begins the comeback trail!

"Come on Mac, LETS SHOCK THE WORLD!"
“Come on Mac, LET’S SHOCK THE WORLD!”

Doc: Mac, I gotta be real here. You sure put on a lot of weight in the last 20+ years.

Mac: I’m not the only one who’s changed. You hardly look like the Doc Louis I knew! In fact, maybe it’s the dizziness from all this running talking but I swear you look yellow all of a sudden!

Doc: What?! You must be going blind in your old age.

***SIX MONTHS LATER***
***SIX MONTHS LATER***
HERE
HERE
WE
WE
GO!
GO!

Doc: Alright Mac, this is your night. You’ve put in the hours. You’ve dropped the weight. Whatever happens tonight, I want you to know, from one old ass fart to another, I’m proud of you for making it this far!

Mac: Come on, Doc. You should know me better than that. I ain’t satisfied making it this far. I didn’t come all this way to finish in second place. Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will BEAT you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or NOBODY is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done! Now if you know what you’re worth then go out and get what you’re worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain’t where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and THAT AIN’T YOU! YOU’RE BETTER THAN THAT!

Doc: Um…

Mac: Whoa, sorry. I get my wires crossed from time to time, you know.

Doc: That one’s probably Nick Bruiser, 1994, Vegas. First round uppercut.

Mac: Don’t worry ’bout me Doc. I still got most of my mental facilities.

Doc: *mutters under breath* Faculties.

Mac: You said something Doc?

Doc: Uh, nope.

*EYE OF THE TIGER PLAYS*

Mac: Hey listen Doc! They playing my music. You know what that means.

Doc: I know what that means. This is your night. Mr. Sandman ain’t what he used to be. Hell, none of us are. But you’re better than him. Always was and always will be. Now you go out there and you leave it all out there in the ring!

Mac: Man, I love you too, Doc Brown.

Doc: *mutters under breath* Soda Popinski, 1987, Detroit, second round hook.

"LETS GO MAC! LETS GO MAC!"
“WELCOME BACK!  *clap clap clap*  WELCOME BACK!”

Though he’s been out of the spotlight for over 20 years now, Mac has adoring fans of all generations. Grandfathers have passed Mac’s legacy down to their fathers. And fathers to sons. After all this time, folks still fondly remember. And they’re not shy to show Mac the appreciation he’s due.

"LETS GO MAC! LETS GO MAC!"
“LETS GO MAC!  *clap clap clap*  LETS GO MAC!”

For one last time, with the good Doc Louis by his side, Mac made that long walk down the aisle with the capacity crowd chanting his name in ecstasy. The show of adoration sent chills up and down Mac’s spine. Even if he doesn’t win, this moment will forever live on.

R.I.P Bernie Mac. The REAL Mac!
R.I.P Bernie Mac. The REAL Mac!

Long time nemesis Mr. Sandman paces in the ring, awaiting Mac’s arrival. We haven’t seen Mr. Sandman in decades, either. He still looks good. It’s the rematch everyone’s talking about. Mac Man vs. Sandman — RING THE BELL!

"THANK YOU MAC! THANK YOU MAC! THANK YOU MAC!"
“THANK YOU MAC! THANK YOU MAC! THANK YOU MAC!”

At the end of a hard fought battle, busted and bruised, Mac took a moment to acknowledge his loyal legion of fans. It’s been one hell of a ride. We’ve witnessed here tonight two boxing legends go toe to toe one last time. The sport will never be the same again. As for who won, the fans did. The sport of boxing did. In an era where we push youth and quickly cast aside the old, this was a historic night where tradition was honored and appreciated. Good night everybody!

Street Fighter II Turbo (SNES)

Pub & Dev: Capcom | August 1993 | 20 MEGS
Pub & Dev: Capcom | August 1993 | 20 MEGS

Street Fighter II jumpstarted a revolution, no doubt. Likewise, there is no doubt that Street Fighter II Turbo refined said revolution. Many would even argue perfected it. Allowing you to use the four boss characters, in addition to adding new special moves for most of the fighters and the all-important speed factor, Street Fighter II Turbo has cemented its place in video gaming lore. The hype surrounding the release back in the summer of 1993 was palpable and surreal. I remember my brother buying this game on launch day and nobody in my gaming group was disappointed one iota. Looking back, it’s easy to see it’s not a perfect conversion of the 1992 arcade smash hit, but man, back in those olden days it sure felt pretty damn close to perfect. You have to remember that home consoles back then weren’t close to being as strong as arcade cabs. It’s amazing what Capcom was able to translate to the little ol’ 16-bit SNES. My friends and I wasted so many hours on this one. Good times.

MAKING A COMEBACK

SNESClassic

With the recent news of Nintendo releasing the SNES Classic Edition, Street Fighter II Turbo is once again being brought back into the public consciousness. It’s the only fighting game featured in the package and if you could only pick one then Nintendo made the right call. Let the nostalgia commence.

THE STREET FIGHTER PHENOMENON

SF2Turbo

Seeing this back in the summer of ’93 was every kid’s dream come true. All 12 Street Fighters available at the tip of your fingers. Same character selects with no codes. Finally, no more excuses. Survival of the strongest. Many scores were settled and many bruises ensued. Even better, Capcom was cool enough to include both Street Fighter II: Champion Edition and Turbo in one package. Champion Edition allows you to control the four boss characters and select the same fighters. Turbo upped the ante by giving most of the original cast a new special move and added a speed setting. Many consider Turbo to be the definitive version of Street Fighter II.

No more excuses!
No more excuses!
Beat the bosses, BE the bosses. Brilliant, Capcom
Beat the bosses, BE the bosses. Brilliant, Capcom
Arguably Capcom's finest hour on the SNES...
Arguably Capcom’s finest hour on the SNES…

SF2Turbo3

I still vividly remember to this day my brother rushing out to buy this game. I stayed at home counting down the minutes. Seeing my brother come back home with the Holy Grail firmly in his grasp was a moment of sheer euphoria. Experiencing the game in our living room, in all its 20 MEG glory, showing off the power of the SNES, it was crazy to see how far video gaming had come since the days of the 8-bit NES. Never was a system more aptly named than the SUPER Nintendo.

THE STREET FIGHTERS

The fight is all that matters to him
The fight is all that matters to him

The face of the franchise, this straight edge no nonsense warrior is all about the fight and nothing else. Some may call him a little vanilla, but Ryu is as solid and consistent as a rock. He’s the Leonardo of the crew, and I guess every franchise needs that one leading cat, eh?

Such a vintage sight!
Such a vintage sight!

Ryu’s stage is simply classic. Battle for supremacy on top of a private roof. A nearby dojo looms hauntingly in the background. Sadly, the moon is missing but back in 1993 none of us really cared. We were way too busy appreciating what we had.

SF2Turbo6SF2Turbo6b

 

 

 

 

 

Straight up two of the most iconic special moves in all of fighting game history.

SF2Turbo7SF2Turbo7b

 

 

 

 

 

Hurricane Kick can now be performed in mid-air.

Of course he was born on Valentine's Day
Of course he was born on Valentine’s Day

Every main protagonist needs a rival. Enter Ken, a flashier version of Ryu. Naturally, he’s a bit temperamental and one cocky son of a gun. Ken is perfect for those who want to control someone with Ryu’s moveset but has a little edge to their character.

There's nothing like seeing this on a Saturday morning
A sight that once dominated my Sunday mornings

Ken’s stage has always been one of my favorites. Being the complete opposite of Ryu in terms of personality, Ken wants a crowd to witness and worship his skills. Nothing gets him going more than humiliating his opponent in front of a packed house, or boat as it were. A pair of barrels propped to the right will shatter upon impact, adding insult to injury.

SF2Turbo10SF2Turbo10b

 

 

 

 

 

Similar moveset to Ryu but Ken’s Dragon Punch travels a bit farther.

Homie needs to cover up his junk better...
Homie needs to cover up his junk better…

The residential sumo grand champion, Edmund Honda is determined to show the world that a sumo champ can also be the world’s greatest fighter. I never much cared for Honda back in the day but over the years have come to appreciate him more.

Prepare for a blood bath [HAR HAR -Ed.]
Prepare for a blood bath [HAR HAR -Ed.]
E. Honda’s stage is awesome. I love the combination of colors used and that background mural is so bizarrely memorable. The best thing about this stage is when the fight is over, the mural lights up and the mural man flashes a sign at you. It’s bonkers.

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Edmund uses his thick head to devastating results. “OOP OINK!” He also has the fastest hands around, unleashing hell in the form of a hundred hand BITCH SLAP. It’s been upgraded; Honda can perform it while inching toward his opponent.

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Honda’s new move serves as a bit of an anti-air special, followed by a diving ass attack. Assack, perhaps.

Now with a fireball in tow -- the KIKOKEN!
Now with a fireball in tow — the KIKOKEN!

Many people think of Chun Li as being the first lady of fighting games. Other people have, AHEM, other thoughts about her but it would be inappropriate to cite said thoughts. You know her story. She’s out to avenge the death of her father who fell at the vile hands of M. Bison. She got arguably the best new move in Turbo as well. A fireball! Hey, it was a big deal back then.

Is that guy choking his chicken watching her?
He’s watching Chun Li while choking his chicken

He’s really got no shame, the git. Chun Li’s stage is another classic that is burned into my soul. Duke it out in front of a busy marketplace complete with cyclists passing through. Should you emerge victorious, you can then partake in buying some dinner or even get a haircut. All in a day’s hard work!

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#NEVERSKIPPEDLEGDAY.

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Remember what a big deal people made back in the early ’90s that Chun Li now has a fireball of her own? And on a side note, her annoying infamous head stomp returns as well.

"Quit blocking my barbershop post!"
“Quit blocking my barbershop post, Chunners!”
One of my favorite Capcom creations of all time
One of my favorite Capcom creations of all time

Ah, the tragic tale of Jimmy. The little boy who descended to the depths of a Brazilian jungle during a plane crash, only to be mutated and raised by the wild savages of the jungle. All that produced the beast you now see… BLANKA!

So many awesome memories of this stage!
So many awesome memories of this stage!

The music, the locals snapping photos to prove the existence of the beast, the savages cheering on from inside the hut packed in like a can of sardines, the giant clouds scrolling lazily by in the background, the giant anaconda wrapped around that decaying tree… this stage tells such a rich story and is perfection personified.

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Blanka’s electric shock fits him so well. That x-ray animation is legendary. His rolling attack has been improved — Blanka no longer takes double damage if he’s hit during the attack.

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Blanka’s new trick is a vertical rolling attack. It doubles as an anti-air move and it can also nail opponents on the way down.

Don't mess with a guy who wrestles with bears
Don’t mess with a guy who wrestles with bears

If Chun Li is the first lady of fighting games, then surely Zangief is the first muscle maniac of the genre. It takes a very skilled player to use Zangief effectively. I love how he wrestles bears for a hobby, and his scar-laced body is proof that he is certifiably a turnbuckle shy of a wrestling ring!

Those are some rowdy Russians!
Those are some rowdy Russians!

Held in the heartland of the USSR, factory workers take a break from the work grind to witness their beloved Zangief crush yet another poor victim.

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Similar to Honda’s Hundred Hand Slap, the Spinning Clothesline can now move. It’s cool how a small change can actually make a big difference. His new move is a crushing German Suplex that would make ECW’s Taz proud!

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Spinning Pile Driver still the most devastating move in the game!

Guile was always the "cool rebel" to us kids
Guile was always the “cool rebel” to us kids

There’s something cool about a good old American badass. Guile fits that role to a tee. He doesn’t have a lot of special moves but he makes each one count. Forget about Charlie, Guile is where it’s at!

Nothing like sending your foe through a crate
We called the guy in the middle there Cyclops…

Street Fighter II has some of the best stages in fighting game history. Guile’s is yet another example of such. The music of this stage is stuck in my head to this day, and it never gets old throwing your opponent through the crates.

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Hadoken set the bench mark for all projectiles to follow, but I’d argue that the Sonic Boom is almost just as memorable. Remember how the jab version was so slow that it allowed you to bash your opponent’s head in with a well-timed back fist? You can’t do that with the Hadoken, that’s for damn sure!

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Champion Edition tweaked the Flash Kick to hit two times. I was never a fan of this change. Thankfully, it’s back to the classic one hit in the Turbo edition. I’ve always been a huge fan of Guile’s Flash Kick. To me it’s just as iconic as the Dragon Punch and it looks way cooler.

[Very funny, NOT -Stretch Armstrong]
[Very funny… NOT -Stretch Armstrong]
Forever a perennial favorite of mine, Dhalsim was the first Street Fighter character I ever used. He was also the one I used when I perfected my brother’s annoying cocky friend at a 7-11 circa 1991. He had no answer for Dhalsim’s long limbs and his hubris was his ultimate downfall. Dhalsim and I have shared a lifelong connection ever since.

Seeing this brings back so many memories of 7-11
Seeing this brings back so many memories of 7-11

Yet another haunting stage. The elegant blue rug, the elephant god mural and of course, who could forget the elephants trumpeting at the end of each battle?

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Dhalsim had the very unique ability of being able to stretch his limbs. This great gimmick was often copied in other fighting games from other companies. Hey, he was a trailblazer!

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Teleportation is Dhalsim’s new special skill. Check out how he uses this new power to confuse, daze and nail his opponent!

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Known for his signature fiery antics, he can spew a small fireball (Yoga Fire) or blow a larger one that is more short ranged but hits for more damage (Yoga Flame). The “on fire” animation is, no pun intended, seared into the memories of anyone who ever ventured through an arcade hall in the early ’90s.

Ah, such a nostalgic visual
Ah, such a nostalgic visual
In Japan he was originally called M. Bison
In Japan he was originally called M. Bison

The first of the four boss characters, Balrog has always been the least interesting to me. He was a sign of the times; Capcom drew inspiration from “Iron” Mike Tyson.

Dat stage tho
Dat stage tho

Fighting under the bright lights of Las Vegas, combatants duke it out as strippers, pimps and tourists cheer the carnage on. Epic background.

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Balrog’s two special moves consist of rushing punch variations. In fact, he is the only fighter in the game to never use his feet. It takes a skilled player to use him effectively.

Vega was Balrog in Japan
Vega was Balrog in Japan

The first time I ever saw Vega I remember thinking how cool he was. Vega to me seemed like a combination of Freddy Krueger and Michael Myers. It wasn’t long before I realized he was nothing more than a masked narcissist with a claw. Just a pretty boy, and nothing at all like those terrifying monsters of my youth. Needless to say, I didn’t like him as much then!

Remember the 1991 rumors of knocking off his mask?
You can knock his claw off, but not his mask

Dropped in the middle of an underground fighting world at an undisclosed location somewhere in Spain, the steel cage protects the spectators from the sheer chaos. But really, it serves as a tool for Vega to scale when things get too hot and heavy…

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Vega’s rolling attack can connect several times and inflict a good deal of damage.

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Nimble as a cat, Vega takes to the cage when all else fails. From here he can either pierce you with his razor sharp claw or catch you in an devastating overhead throw.

One of my favorite Capcom characters of all time
How many Asians you know are 7’4″? :P

In the first Street Fighter tournament, reigning champion Sagat was dethroned by a young warrior named Ryu. Ryu’s Dragon Punch left an enormous scar on his chest and ever since then the Thailand terror has been training 24/7, waiting for the perfect moment to exact his revenge.

Brings back memories of Jet Li's SHAOLIN TEMPLE
The chest scar, the eye patch… what a character

A giant Buddha statue oversees the battle as combatants wrestle to the death in this beautiful and serene stage. The temples in the backdrop remind me of the old 1982 Jet Li film, Shaolin Temple.

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Sagat’s two Tiger Shots hits either high or low. Switch the velocity to keep your opponent on their toes.

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Sagat’s Tiger Knee connects on the ground for up to two devastating hits, and doubles as an anti-air attack to boot.

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Needing to counter Ryu’s lethal Dragon Punch, the deadly Tiger Uppercut came to life. His chest scar is a daily reminder of the pain and humiliation he suffered in the first tournament. Seeking vengeance, Sagat believes his Tiger Uppercut will be the difference maker.

He was known as Vega in Japan
He was known as Vega in Japan

Remember how much we hated M. Bison as kids when he was in Street Fighter II? And remember how much we wanted to control him just so we could pull off his Psycho Crusher? Street Fighter II Turbo made our dreams come true.

That cape tossing is so bloody cool
That cape tossing is so bloody cool

The sky paints such an ominous backdrop. Towering golden statues decorate each side of the stage which you can send your opponent crashing through. A massive bell that looks like it came straight out of a Bob Ross water painting rests center stage.

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Scissor Kick can hit up to two times, one high and one low. Tricky and deadly!

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Jumping high, Bison plants both feet into your skull and then flies backwards to smash your temple in with his tyrannical fist. OUCH!

You felt so badass screaming across the screen!
You felt so badass screaming across the screen!

BONUS STAGES

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Who could ever forget the first time seeing the car bonus stage? It’s an iconic gaming sight, and one that still resonates more than 25 years later.

Bricks don't hit back
Bricks don’t hit back
Bonus stages were a fighting game staple of the '90s
Bonus stages became a staple for the genre

THE MAN IN THE MOUNTAIN

Is that really Dhalsim there?
Is that really Dhalsim there?

When we were kids my brother and I believed that was none other than Dhalsim on the front cover showing off his new teleportation special move. Fast forward some odd 15 years to 2008, I posted my memories about this on a message board and everyone there told me “No, it’s just Honda and Sagat on the cover.” I wasn’t so quick to buy in, though, as I assumed everyone thought back in the day the same thing that my brother and I did. The debate somehow summoned the original artist of the SNES Street Fighter II Turbo cover into the fold. He claimed that the strange bald figure seen on the cover is NOT Dhalsim. I asked him who was it then, but he never got back to me. The mural man doesn’t look a damn thing like the bald guy we see on the cover. Strange. I guess we’ll never know for sure. But I still stand by my original statement… to me it was clever Capcom showing off Dhalsim’s brand new special skill. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it! #childhoodconvictions

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

1993 -- what a time for a gamer to be alive
1993 — what a time for a gamer to be alive

Street Fighter II Turbo was a smash hit with the critics. It earned Game of the Month accolades with EGM, posting scores of 9, 9, 10 and 10. GameFan gave it ratings of 98, 98, 99 and 100%. Super Play rated it a whopping 96% — the highest score they ever dished out. This port is widely considered as one of the BEST arcade to home translations on the SNES. In terms of top 100 lists, Nintendo Power ranked it #10, EGM had it at #5 and Super Play placed it at #2.

Street Fighter II Turbo ranked high on many lists
Street Fighter II Turbo ranked high on many lists

WHAT YOU, THE READERS, SAID

Which SNES Street Fighter game got the most votes?
Which SNES Street Fighter game got the most votes?

More than a decade ago, way back in February 2007, on my old original RVGFanatic website I ran a survey asking my readers to vote for their favorite SNES Street Fighter game. You voiced your opinion loudly. Now, more than 10 years later, the final results are in. Come on, you didn’t think I would lose those figures, right? Don’t answer that. While obviously not conclusive — this is one small sample after all — it’s interesting to see nevertheless. 10% prefer the very first one while 39% voted for Super Street Fighter II. It was no shock that Street Fighter II Turbo won the poll with a stirring 51% of the votes. I love all the SNES Street Fighter games (yes, even 1996’s Street Fighter Alpha 2) but Street Figher II Turbo to me will forever be the king.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

Simply the best
Simply the best

Street Fighter II Turbo forever holds a special place in my heart. It gave me and my gaming crew so many fond memories over the years. For my money, it is without a shadow of a doubt the best fighting game on the Super Nintendo. At the time it blew all of us away. And while it’s true that it isn’t a perfect conversion of the arcade (nobody expected it to be), it still made for the perfect SNES fighting game. Even though there have been arcade-perfect ports of Street Fighter II Turbo released on other systems over the years, I still find myself coming back to the SNES version and having a blast. Maybe I’m a little blinded by nostalgia but I’ll be damned if it doesn’t still hold up well nearly 25 years later.

Shit never gets old
Shit never gets old

No, it definitely doesn’t. ;)

Graphics: 10
Sound: 10
Gameplay: 10
Longevity: 10

Overall: 10
PLATINUM AWARD

Award6When you talk about Super Nintendo’s very finest, any discussion excluding Street Fighter II Turbo should automatically be null and void. It was a video gaming revolution — a special time we’re likely never to see again. I’m thankful I got to witness it first-hand.

Long live the memories
Long live the king
"HADOKEN!"
“HADOKEN!”

SNES Classic Edition

It's happening
It’s happening

Yesterday news broke that Nintendo would indeed be releasing their SNES Classic Edition starting on September 29, 2017. Last year they released their NES Classic Edition for $60 and it was a smash hit. Rumors began swirling immediately that the SNES Classic Edition wouldn’t be far behind and sure enough, it’s almost here. For the low price of $80 here’s what you get:

  • HDMI support
  • SNES (super) mini
  • Two classic SNES controllers
  • 21 classic SNES games preloaded into the system

SNESClassic

Let’s take a closer look at all 21 games, in alphabetical order.

1. CONTRA III: THE ALIEN WARS

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One of the most intense action-packed 2 player SNES games ever made. Contra III is classic run and gun mayhem. Best experienced with a friend in tow, there’s nothing like blasting alien scum to Kingdom Come as you navigate your way through some of the most memorable moments in 16-bit gaming.

2. DONKEY KONG COUNTRY

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There were three DKC games released on the SNES, with many citing the second (Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddy’s Kong Quest) as their favorite. I actually prefer the first one. Call it nostalgia but it was fresh, mind blowing for its time and the difficulty was just right. A little on the easy side at times, but it cranked it up when it needed to. Mainly, I enjoyed using Donkey Kong in all his glory. Don’t forget those amazing tunes, either!

3. EARTHBOUND

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Take The Wonder Years, Peanuts, Doug, The Goonies, Dragon Quest and put them all in a blender. You’d probably get something like EarthBound. Whimsical, unique and different, EarthBound is charming and captivating as hell. But there also lies some sneaky mature themes throughout, such as the loss of innocence in a corrupt world. A classic RPG any SNES fan should play through before all is said and done.

4. FINAL FANTASY III

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Arguably the greatest 16-bit RPG ever made, Final Fantasy III is an epic adventure. It took me nearly 50 hours to beat back in 2008 when I experienced it for the first time, and I loved every second of it. Memorable characters, plot twists, haunting music… it has it all. It’s too bad the almost-just-as-good Final Fantasy II isn’t also included, though. But if you had to pick just one, they made the right choice here.

5. F-ZERO

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It may seem a little outdated today, especially to F-Zero virgins, but this blew our minds back in 1991. It still holds up well, although it is a bit bare bones. Still a good choice. The music is awesome. You could say that for most of these games, quite frankly.

6. KIRBY’S DREAM COURSE

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Of all the games featured on the SNES Classic Edition, this is the most surprising. I don’t say that disparagingly! Kirby’s Dream Course combines the best of Kirby and golf. It’s a blast to play and addicting as hell. Glad this made the cut. It doesn’t get the props it deserves. Now a larger audience will get to experience this for the first time. As well as SNES fans from the ’90s who somehow missed out on this back in the day. A definite dark horse candidate for “Game I Didn’t Expect To Sink So Many Hours On.”

7. KIRBY SUPER STAR

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Rather than one grand adventure, Kirby Super Star is a compendium of nine standalone games. It’s vintage Kirby, and it’s loads of fun.

8. THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: A LINK TO THE PAST

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A no-brainer. One of the best SNES games ever, nay, one of the best video games of all time. A masterpiece in every sense, this adventure will forever remain timeless and quintessential. Who could ever forget the first time they saw that rain come whipping down?

9. MEGA MAN X

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The best Mega Man game on the SNES. Never before could the Blue Bomber move around like he does here. The ability to scale walls, ride armored machines and even throw a Hadoken made Mega Man X one unforgettable journey.

10. SECRET OF MANA

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The first ever 3-player action RPG, Secret of Mana was a marvel for its time. It’s a great game but one that I do feel is slightly overrated. Still, the ability to play it with two friends made it something special. It’ll be interesting to see if Nintendo releases a multitap for the SNES Classic Edition. 2-player Secret of Mana is still awesome but it’d be a shame not to be able to experience it as a 3-player affair. On a side note, I much prefer the Super Famicom-only sequel, Secret of Mana 2 AKA Seiken Densetsu 3.

11. STAR FOX

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Star Fox was pretty amazing back in 1993. It’s a little rough around the edges today in 2017, but hopefully people will be able to overlook the dated visuals which were considered fairly groundbreaking for its time.

12. STAR FOX 2

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The biggest news of this SNES Classic Edition is the inclusion of never before officially released Star Fox 2. This game was programmed back in the mid ’90s but never saw the light of day as the N64 was looming over the horizon. Of course the repro of this game has been available for many years now, but it’ll be nice to have an official release (especially HDMI-supported).

13. STREET FIGHTER II TURBO

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Some people argue Super Street Fighter II is better, but I’ll take Street Fighter II Turbo. Street Fighter II created a revolution, but it was Turbo that refined it. For my money this is hands down the best fighting game on the SNES. So many sore thumbs and even more sore egos courtesy of this game back in 1993. Good times.

14. SUPER CASTLEVANIA IV

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It’s a little slow and the visuals are a bit outdated by today’s standards, but this was the definitive Castlevania game for many folks prior to Symphony of the Night. Being able to swing Simon’s whip in all directions made controlling him a breeze and loads of fun. There’s a beautiful simplicity to this game. Besides, who doesn’t enjoy taking down Count Dracula?

15. SUPER GHOULS ‘N GHOSTS

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Probably the hardest game of this list, Super Ghouls ‘n Ghosts suffers from some slowdown but still provides one hell, pardon the pun, of a romp through some ghastly levels. I’m glad this game made the list. It’s a classic but often slightly overlooked in lieu of some bigger names such as Super Metroid and Contra III. Well deserved, Sir Arthur. Well deserved. You’ll terrorize a whole new generation of gamers. Congrats, good sir.

16. SUPER MARIO KART

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The Mario Kart franchise is one of the most beloved of all time. It’s so good that it attracts even the most casual of gamers. There’s something very likable about the characters from the Mario universe, the various weapons and imaginative course designs that constantly bring people back for more and more. This is where it all started — it’s the granddaddy of all Mario Kart games. Still playable after all these years!

17. SUPER MARIO RPG: LEGEND OF THE SEVEN STARS

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Mario in an RPG? Nuts. Bowser as a playable good guy? Even more nuts. Yet it all works, to no one’s surprise. Super Mario RPG brings timing to the RPG party as well as some wacky, lovable characters. A good time for sure.

18. SUPER MARIO WORLD

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Released on the Super Famicom’s Launch Day of November 21, 1990, Super Mario World is still as playable today as it was nearly 30 years ago. Shigeru Miyamoto knows how to make a damn good video game, and his fingerprints are all over this one. Great visuals, amazing music and smooth gameplay. Can’t ask for much more.

19. SUPER METROID

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If there were a Super Nintendo Mount Rushmore, anyone who doesn’t include Super Metroid automatically has their list disqualified. You just can’t talk about the very best SNES games without mentioning this 24 MEG GEM. Adventure, atmosphere, gun slinging, exploration, Super Metroid has it all. And that is all.

20. SUPER PUNCH-OUT!!

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Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out!! was one of the best NES games ever made. Its sequel, Super Punch-Out!!, is also an excellent arcade-like take on the sport of boxing. It’s all about patterns, timing, memorization and execution. While the new boxers here may lack the personality of the NES game, it’s still one of my favorites and I’m happy to see it made the list.

21. YOSHI’S ISLAND

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Aside from baby Mario’s incredibly annoying crying whenever he’s dismounted, Yoshi’s Island is a daring and brilliant deviation from the standard Mario game formula. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea but I find it equally as splendid as Super Mario World — just in slightly different ways.

TOP NINE SNUBS

The NES Classic Edition had 30 games, but the SNES Classic Edition only carries 21. However, the 21 games here are obviously much lengthier than the ones found on the NES edition. While the 21 games represented are great choices, there are a few glaring omissions. Whether due to licensing or whatever, here are nine great SNES games (in alphabetical order) that are conspicuous by their absence.

Oh, and before we begin, I will refrain from including the following two titles due to the simple fact that it doesn’t look like we’ll be getting any sort of multitap with the SNES Classic Edition. While both these games are still great as 2-player games, the real magic comes with a room of 4.

NBA Jam T.E.
NBA Jam T.E.
Super Bomberman
Super Bomberman

1. ACTRAISER

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An early first generation title and a classic one at that. ActRaiser switches seamlessly between side-scrolling levels of good old hack and slash platforming and a simulation mode where you must help build the land and protect the people. It’s a little simplistic but it didn’t need to be complex.

2. CHRONO TRIGGER

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Perhaps the most glaring omission of all, some believe Chrono Trigger to be the best SNES game ever created. Quite a loss, then, not to have one of the very best titles ever made in 16-bit history. Although I do understand at least a little bit since Nintendo already packed in three RPGs. Still, it’s tough losing out on this one.

3. DONKEY KONG COUNTRY 2: DIDDY’S KONG QUEST

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Although I prefer the original Donkey Kong Country, I’ll concede that this does play slightly better. If you had Yoshi’s Island to go along with Super Mario World, you probably should have added this as well. Alas, poor Diddy and newcomer Dixie Kong are left hanging… [HAR HAR -Ed.]

4. THE LEGEND OF THE MYSTICAL NINJA

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Another classic 2-player SNES game from the system’s early days. Perhaps this was a little too offbeat for Nintendo to include for the mainstream, however. If that is the case, that’s a shame because the gameplay shines through and speaks for itself. Note: This game is included in the Super Famicom Classic Edition as Ganbare Goemon.

5. POCKY & ROCKY

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Hard as nails, but also super fun with a friend right alongside ya! It’s too bad this got snuffed… it would have exposed Pocky & Rocky to a brand new generation of gamers.

6. SUNSET RIDERS

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Vintage glorious 2-player gun slinging action. ‘Nuff said.

7. TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES IV: TURTLES IN TIME

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Next to Chrono Trigger, this is the biggest glaring omission. Not to mention it would have been the only beat ‘em up on the SNES Classic Edition. That makes its absence all the more egregious. No beat ‘em ups represented?! That’s a crime! But I totally understand it might have been a licensing issue and Nintendo simply not wanting to pay the extra cost for the Ninja Turtles brand. Whatever the case may be, it’s a shame. This defined many of our 16-bit childhoods and is arguably the finest beat ‘em up on the SNES.

8. TETRIS ATTACK

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No puzzle games are represented either, and Tetris Attack is the best as far as I’m concerned. This inclusion would have provided endless hours of cutthroat competitive play, and it saddens me that it didn’t make the cut. Well, at least for the American release. The Super Famicom Classic Edition does include this game but under its Japanese title of Panel de Pon.

9. ZOMBIES ATE MY NEIGHBORS

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Come on, Nintendo. This is another classic childhood game for many of us who grew up in the early ’90s. Every kid played this game to death that holiday season of 1993. Sure, it may be a little overrated but it’s freaking ZOMBIES ATE MY NEIGHBORS! Nintendo, you could have even tweaked it to make it better. Think about an easier difficulty setting, a strafe button, etc. A missed opportunity any way you slice it.

10. KEN GRIFFEY JR. PRESENTS MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL

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This is my honorable mention. I love this game and it was also published by Nintendo. I see why it wasn’t included, though. Fake player names, outdated rosters and so forth. But damn is this game fun. Many people, even non baseball fans, still play it to this very day. It would also have been the only sports title featured in the package.

SUPER FAMICOM CLASSIC EDITION

I THINK I AM TURNING JAPANESE...
“I THINK I AM TURNING JAPANESE…”

In Japan, the system will include Panel de Pon (Tetris Attack)Fire Emblem: Mystery of the EmblemGanbare Goemon: The Legend of the Mystical NinjaSuper Soccer, and Super Street Fighter II. These titles replace EarthBoundKirby’s Dream CourseStreet Fighter II Turbo, Super Castlevania IV, and Super Punch-Out!! from the US model.

Super Punch-Out!! was never released in Japan. Strange but true. I guess they’re keeping true to form 20+ years later…

CLOSING THOUGHTS

Welcome back, dear old friend
Welcome back, dear old friend

For $80 this is an insane bargain. Having 21 classic SNES titles, with HDMI support, in one tiny system is greatly appealing particularly to those who don’t already own these classics. You’re talking less than $4 a game, and that’s not including the system. Sadly, the NES Classic Edition suffered from lack of production and over demand, causing scalpers to swoop in and take advantage. Preorders for the SNES Classic Edition are going fast and resellers are everywhere posed to capitalize. $300 markups would be a safe bet. Of course, when you consider some of these games sell TODAY for close to $300 individually, $300 might still seem like a good deal for 21 games. And it is, at less than $15 a game. But it would be a shame to pay $300 for something that is retailing for just $80. As always, it’s a call only the individual can make. I already own all these games so I’d pass if the asking price is $300, but at $80 I would probably bite. But what are the odds I’ll be able to find one for $80? Probably not high.

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But on a more happy note, I’m just ecstatic that my favorite console, the Super Nintendo, is back in the mainstream spotlight. I expect a ton of nostalgia to overcome young adults in their 30s who see this package and go “Oh wow, I haven’t played these games in 20, 25 years!” It just makes me happy knowing the SNES will once again bask in the glow of the spotlight. Nintendo plans to stop production of these Classic Editions at the end of 2017, so the spotlight will be short-lived, but it’s nice knowing come September a lot of casual people will be buying a Super Nintendo in 20-freaking-17. And who knows, it may lead to something bigger. At the very least, exposure never hurts and it thrills me that younger generations of gamers will have a chance to play and appreciate these classics. That’s a definite win in my book!

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EXTRA EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT!

Speaking of SNES comebacks...
Speaking of SNES comebacks…

By the way, it recently came to my attention that BS Shockman is getting an official Super Famicom release June of 2017! Wow! The SNES scene is booming right now in a way we haven’t seen in a long time. BS Shockman is also known as BS Kaizou Choujin Shubibinman Zero. Check out my review for more info.

Fun 2-player game worth checking out
Fun 2-player game worth checking out

Rock on, SNES. Rock the f*ck on.

Super Baseball 2020 (SNES)

Pub: Tradewest | Dev: Monolith | July 1993 | 12 MEGS
Pub: Tradewest | Dev: Monolith | July 1993 | 12 MEGS

Super Baseball 2020 was originally released in the arcades back in late 1991 as part of the Neo Geo lineup. It was later ported to the SNES in the summer of 1993. It’s crazy that we’re only two and a half years away from 2020! When I first saw the arcade cab in ’91 I remember thinking to myself that 2020 would never get here. Indeed, at the time it was nearly 30 years away. 30 years to a kid is an eternity. Yet here we are. On the brink of 2020. That blows my mind. Looks like we won’t have super robots playing baseball a couple years from now, though. But hey, you can always simulate that with Super Baseball 2020!

WELCOME TO THE YEAR 2020

HE HITS IT HIIIIGH...
HE HITS IT HIIIIGH…
... HITS IT DEEEEEEP...
… HITS IT DEEEEEEP…
... IT ISSSSSS...
… IT ISSSSSS…
... OUTTA HERE!!!
… OUTTA HERE!!!
Gotta have giant scrolling letters. It was the 16-bit era!
Gotta have giant scrolling letters in the 16-bit era
Love that classic SNES controller
Love that classic SNES controller

FAIR OR FOUL?

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Baseball rules and regulations have drastically changed by the year 2020. Now the emphasis is on a larger fair playing field, making action quicker and more exciting. The foul zone’s been reduced to strictly behind the catcher. As a result, one can score hits all over the field!

SHOW ME THE MONEY

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Upgrade your robotic players to super soldiers of destruction. Money is earned based on positive plays. Similarly, money is lost on negative plays. Adds a bit of depth and strategy to the old baseball formula.

Super Baseball 2020, sponsored by Pete Rose
Super Baseball 2020, sponsored by Pete Rose

SPECIAL CUTSCENES

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Exceptional outs are highlighted by cutscenes, just like in the arcade!

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Check out the timing on this one. The ball should sail off those fancy blue glass plates for a single or double, but alas…

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Some robots are faster than others
Some robots are faster than others

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“DAMNIT UMP, I WAS SAFE!”

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“DAMNIT UMP, HE WAS OUT!”

WHAT THE PROS WEAR IN 2020

NEO-TITANIUM ALLOY BAT FTW!
NEO-TITANIUM ALLOY BAT FTW

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Leap over 20 feet into the air to rob would be HRs
Leap over 20 feet in the air to rob home runs

KICK SOME GLASS

Home runs are delegated to dead center
Home runs are delegated to dead center

One of the best things about this game is no doubt those futuristic looking blue glass plates that cover the audience. More than cosmetic, balls that are hit on the glass plates are considered in play! This leads to what I like to call “Wall Ball.” Nothing beats smacking a ball so hard that it rolls down several planes of glass, allowing you to stretch singles into doubles or even triples!

JUST foul! D'oh
JUST foul! D’oh

Balls to the wall fun... [You're fired -Ed.]
Balls to the wall fun… [You’re fired -Ed.]
Wall Ball is a hoot. It’s even better when you have runners on base. Balls hammered to the far reaches of the stadium bounce slowly off the glass as your men round the bases.

They remind me of Lego's blue plates...
They remind me of Lego’s blue plates…
The nostalgia!
The nostalgia!

Who didn’t love Lego back in the day? In addition to the huge bases and fortresses you could lose yourself in for hours on end, I was always fascinated by the color glass plates. Playing Super Baseball 2020 takes me back to those innocent childhood days playing with my favorite Lego sets. One of my favorites was the Metro PD Station. The glass windows resemble those of Super Baseball 2020 so much.

WHAT’S THE PASSWORD?

Seasons are 15 games long, not 162
Seasons are 15 games long, not 162
"OOH YEEEEAH! DIG IT!"
“OOH YEEEEAH! DIG IT!”
The real Mega Powers
The real Mega Powers

The password feature is a bummer. Baseball games of this era mostly used a battery backup memory. Thankfully, seasons are only 15 games long. It makes the password tracking a bit more bearable. Also, the 12 character passwords aren’t the worst in the world. Not ideal, but not a deal breaker.

THE TEAMS

There are 12 teams in all
There are 12 teams in all
Total: 22 points
Total points: 22

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Total: 26 points
Total points: 26

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Total points: 23
Total points: 23

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2020Baseball35

Total points: 24
Total points: 24

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2020Baseball38

Total points: 29
Total points: 29

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2020Baseball41

Total points: 22
Total points: 22

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2020Baseball44

Ninja Black Sox? Best baseball team name ever
Ninja Black Sox? Best baseball team name ever
Total points: 20
Total points: 20

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2020Baseball48

Total points: 22
Total points: 22

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2020Baseball51

Total points: 28
Total points: 28

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2020Baseball54

Total points: 25
Total points: 25

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2020Baseball57

Total points: 24
Total points: 24

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2020Baseball60

Total points: 29
Total points: 29

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Lowest team in terms of total points: Aussie Battlers (20). Highest team in terms of total points: Taiwan Mega Powers and Tropical Girls (29). The Tropical Girls and the Battle Angels are the two all-female teams. I love that each team has its own pros and cons.

PLAY BALL!

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Overwork your players and robots will falter and break down. Once they explode, they become extremely ineffective. As soon as they show signs of wearing down, you’d do well to replace them.

Well that an easy decision to go with Lu...
Well that was an easy decision to go with Lu…
Tonight's exciting match-up
Tonight’s exciting match-up
Blatant Mode 7 up the wazoo
Blatant Mode 7 up the wazoo

All games in the year 2020 are played exclusively in the Cyber Egg Stadium. Gone are unique team stadiums and home field advantage. It’s a bit of a shame but the Cyber Egg Stadium is so cool that it almost makes you forget about there being only one ballpark to play in. Almost.

Looks fairly close to the Neo Geo original
Looks fairly close to the Neo Geo original
It's HIGH... but FOUL!
It’s HIGH… but FOUL!
The audience looks great
The audience looks great
"It's at the 10... the 20... it could... GO ALL THE WAY!"
“It’s at the 10… the 20… it could… GO ALL THE WAY!”

Apparently, even in the year 2020 some things never change. Seems like in the off-season the Cyber Egg Stadium also acts as a football stadium. Oakland A’s and Oakland Raiders, I’m looking at you.

Home runs only count when hit to dead center
Home runs only count when hit to dead center

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HURRY, get in position! Now jump! *CLUNK* D’OH!

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Trash talking while all this is going on is half the fun!
Trash talkin’ while all this is going on is half the fun!

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Replace your pitcher, fielders, base runners or hitter with a robot off the bench, or upgrade if you have the cash.

Be a shame to ruin its brand new shiny exterior...
Be a shame to ruin its brand new shiny exterior…

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REVENGE OF THE BOTS V: BALLS TO THE WALLS
REVENGE OF THE BOTS V: BALLS TO THE WALLS
Bases loaded make it even sweeter
Bases loaded make it even sweeter
Check out how long this ball will roll for...
Check out how long this ball will roll for…
Not stopping for the first row...
Not stopping for the first row…
... nor the third row...
… nor the third row…
This unique feature alone makes this a blast to play
Get those Pokemon Ball looking runners home!

After being crushed way to the top of the upper deck, it finally lands somewhere on the 8th glass plane and begins to bounce off several on the way down. Meanwhile the runners are circling the bases like mad ants and the opposition can’t do a DAMN thing about it but wait and curse. This unique feature alone makes Super Baseball 2020 a blast to play with a friend.

6-0 and STILL bouncing!
6-0 and STILL bouncing!
7-0 and STILL no end in sight. Crazy!
7-0 and STILL no end in sight. Crazy!

It cannot be overstated how much fun comes from the trash talking that ensues in moments such as this. My brother and I had a riot taunting each other while playing this game. Having only one stadium for all 12 teams is a bit of a bummer but like I said, when the one stadium is as cool as the Cyber Egg Stadium, it’s a lot easier to overlook.

Another unique aspect: STOP signs in the field
It could help or hurt you. It all depends…

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Instead of the typical 7th inning stretch, in the year 2020 the 7th inning means only one thing: the WILD CARD INNING. This is where both teams receive a major boost of added power. Because you know, baseball and steroids have never been linked together before. Things tend to get a little nutty in the 7th…

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[Sure ya did -Ed.]
[Sure ya did -Ed.]
Fireworks down 9-2? You're better than that...
Fireworks down 9-2? You’re better than that…

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MEGA POWERS WIN IT ALL

I played a 15 game season with the Mega Powers and was neck and neck with the all-female team, the Battle Angels. The most epic game of the season came in Game #13 which saw my Mega Powers (10-2) going up against the Battle Angels (10-2). I was up 6-4 going to the bottom of the 9th, but the Angels scratched back to tie it at 6 a piece. I ended up surviving a barn burner 7-6 after 13 innings and five (!) dead robots. It was one of those epic games you never forget. I finished the season 13-2 and went on to defeat the special team in the Championship game.

THE FUTURE ISN’T ALWAYS BETTER

  • No tagging back. If you attempt to advance on an outfield out, there’s no turning back. I guess the robots were programmed with this flaw and no one caught it during quality assurance.
  • No way to change the batting order or fielders.
  • Zero individual stat tracking.
  • You can’t run to the next base until the other runner passes it. This becomes glaringly annoying when you have a fast robot trailing a pair of robots that would make Bernie Sanders look like Deion Sanders.
  • Fielding is about 75% automatic. The other 25% of the time it’s not as smooth and well executed as the baseball game that set the standard for defensive fielding, Ken Griffey Jr. Presents Major League Baseball.

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

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The SNES port of Super Baseball 2020 was well received for the most part. GameFan gave it ratings of 70, 76, 80 and 82%. Super Play rated it 85%. The SNES port did an admirable job replicating what made the arcade game such a fan favorite. Appealing even to non baseball fans, Super Baseball 2020 brings a refreshing new take on America’s favorite pastime.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

One of the best Neo Geo to SNES conversions out there
I love me some good old 16-bit baseball! :)

It was quite the thrill seeing this childhood favorite of mine at a retro gaming store back in 2006. Seeing Super Baseball 2020 in the wild brought back a flood of fond memories of playing the Neo Geo cab at Safeway as well as renting the SNES port. Being that the game takes place in the year 2020, there’s a neat little futuristic feel to the whole game. This includes the robotic players, the sleek looking blue glass planes that cover the entire Cyber Egg Stadium, and the interesting financial aspects that bring a new dimension of strategy and know-how to the old baseball formula. Put together, it all works rather well. I can’t stress how fun it is to play this game against a like-minded friend or sibling. OK so there are only 12 teams, only one stadium and too many players look alike, but the fun factor covers a multitude of sins.

"WHAT CHU LOOKING AT?!"
“WHAT CHU LOOKING AT?!”

Is it the pinnacle of baseball games? No. It’s certainly not without its flaws (as noted earlier), but you simply won’t find another baseball title like this on your 16-bit Super Nintendo. Any time a game can put itself in a “special class” of its own and is fun to play, that game is going to earn bonus points with me. Nothing beats hitting those scorching wall ball hits. The best ones are the rare hits where the ball doesn’t bounce but roll slowly down the glass planes. These hits can lead to inside the park home runs but are extremely rare, which makes it all the more satisfying when it does happen. Aside from the missing bombs, speech samples and some frames of animation, this is a faithful translation of the arcade smash hit. The graphics are big and colorful. There’s a certain solid simplicity to the visuals. The sound is nothing to write home about, but not anything I hated. This is just a fun little baseball game. It doesn’t come close to touching the epochal Ken Griffey Jr. Presents Major League Baseball, but for a decent alternative with a neat futuristic ambiance and quirks you just won’t find elsewhere, Super Baseball 2020 smashes a solid double in the bottom of the 9th.

Graphics: 8
Sound: 6
Gameplay: 7.5
Longevity: 8

AwardOverall: 7.5
Bronze Award

 

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Ken Griffey Jr. Presents Major League Baseball (SNES)

Pub: Nintendo | Dev: Sculptured Software | March 1994 | 16 MEGS
Pub: Nintendo | Dev: Software Creations | March 1994 | 16 MEGS

Yesterday, June 20, marked the first day of summer (2017). I love the summer time. It just takes me back to my youth. To a time of innocence and hot lazy summer days spent playing the latest 16-bit games with my brother and our friends. Summer also always makes me think of baseball. It’s hard not to get romantic about baseball. It’s my first true love as far as sports go. And the best baseball game on the SNES is hands down Ken Griffey Jr. Presents Major League Baseball. My brother and I owned this game back in the mid ’90s and we played it to death. Never once did we get sick of it. It’s amazing how well it holds up more than 20 years later. I still frequently play it and I probably always will. This will be more of a love letter than a review. Because damn do I love this game!

MEET “THE KID”

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Lovely little intro.

Arguably the best 16-bit baseball game of all time
Arguably the best 16-bit baseball game of all time
It's sure got my vote
It sure has my vote

WHO IS “THE KID” KEN GRIFFEY?

One of the best baseball stars from the '90s
One of the best baseball stars from the ’90s

Ken Griffey Jr., the son of a Major Leaguer, shagged fly balls and took batting practice with the game’s best players from a young age. This experience paved the way for his own big league career. In 1989, at the tender age of 19, Griffey’s lively bat and dazzling defense led him to make the Mariners’ opening day lineup. In his Major League debut he showed the poise of a veteran, doubling off Oakland ace Dave Stewart in his first at bat. Throughout his first season, Griffey’s stellar defensive achievements drew immediate comparisons to the original Kid, Willie Mays. His love for the game was handed down from his father, Ken Griffey Sr., who played 19 seasons in the Majors and won two World Series rings with the Cincinnati Reds. Coincidentally, Griffey Jr. spent most of the 2000s as a member of the Reds.

Destined for greatness
Destined for greatness

In 1990 the pair made Major League history as the first father and son to play together on the same team. Later that season, the Griffey duo smashed back-to-back home runs in the first inning of a game against the California Angels. Following the 1990 season, Jr. won his first Gold Glove to become the youngest American League player to receive that honor. Not satisfied with being described as a potential star, Jr. made huge strides in 1991 and 1992. In 1991, the 21 year old set a team record by hitting .327 and in 1992 he led the Mariners with 27 home runs. He also drove in 203 runs during that two season stretch and was named the MVP of the 1992 All-Star Game in San Diego.

1993 proved to be the year of the KID
1993 proved to be the year of the KID

1993 was the year that transformed Ken Griffey Jr. from a star to a legitimate MVP candidate. En route to clouting a (then) career high 45 home runs, Griffey tied a Major League record by hitting at least one home run in eight consecutive games. In 1994 — a season cut short by the baseball players’ strike — Griffey broke Mickey Mantle’s record of 20 home runs through May on May 23. He was on his way to break Roger Maris’ home run record of 61, which no one had come close to challenging since Maris met the record more than 30 years ago. Shame about that strike. We’ll never know.

What a tremendous five year start
What a five year start!

THE KID AND ME

Sometimes the smallest moments carry us through
Sometimes the smallest moments carry us through

I was in the middle of 7th grade when my family moved us in January of 1996. It was difficult adjusting. The kids in my new town were nice to me, but they weren’t like the ones “back home.” Moving away from my best friend Nelson was particularly hard. One quirky memory I have of those early months in my new town involved “The Kid.” After school one day I was walking out when I saw a card lying by the bushes. It was a Donruss ’89 Ken Griffey Jr. rookie card. Seeing it made me think of the Griffey SNES game, which brought a smile to my face during a time when I found it difficult to smile. Like a hero reaching out to save me, I reached down and plucked the card out of the dirt, brushing it off as I held it up in the glistening sun to admire it. Sure, the corners were nicked somewhat and the card surely had seen better days. But to me, in that moment, its imperfections were perfect. My brother and I would go on to buy the Griffey SNES game later that same year. We wore out our thumbs playing it to death. Playing the game helped me get through my hometown blues in those early days. I still fondly remember all the times I spent playing the game after a particularly tough day, and how it lifted me up in those trying times. Thanks, Kid.

REAL MAJOR LEAGUE PLAYERS!

This book was a game changer, pardon the pun
This book was a game changer, pardon the pun

Sharp baseball fans knew that while Ken Griffey was the only real named player in the game, the whole game was based on real players all. It had authentic stats but used fake names instead. All stats are based off the 1993 season. Cleverly using a name edit feature, one could edit the game to have all the real players’ names! My brother and I were at this mom and pop book store in 1996 and there we found THE SCOUTING REPORT: 1994. For just five bucks, we now had access to all the real players! We went to town with the edit feature later that night in order to make our game 100% authentic.

Very sneaky of Software Creations. Brilliant!
Very sneaky of Software Creations. Brilliant!
The game's stats matched the 1993 stats to a tee
The game’s stats matched the 1993 stats to a tee
Look what happens when you try to be immature...
Look what happens when you try to be immature…
Just kidding, not really
OK, not really
Hey, I can be shameless from time to time
Hey, I can be shameless from time to time
Barry's reaction to hitting #756  (August 8, 2007)
Barry’s reaction to hitting #756 (August 8, 2007)

Barry Bonds, even before he likely took steroids in the late ’90s, was one of the game’s very best. Long before he broke Hammering Hank Aaron’s home run record of 755 bombs, he was already a major force to be reckoned with. Many considered him and Griffey to be the top two talents throughout the 1990s. His bio in THE SCOUTING REPORT is fun to look back on.

He put the choke thing to rest in the 2002 World Series
“The Man” and “The Kid” carried baseball in the ’90s
Wow, 43 million. That's now money for a journeyman!
Wow, 43 million. That’s now money for a journeyman

AIN’T A TEAM IF YA AIN’T GOT A THEME!

The fake names are hilarious here. Rather than being random and generic, each team has a theme. For instance, the Chicago White Sox features former star athletes from St. John’s University: Mark Jackson, Chris Mullin and the late Malik Sealy to name but three.

The California Angels have famous actors: Fred Astaire, Humphrey Bogart, John Wayne, etc.

The Boston Red Sox features members from Cheers (Norm Peterson, Sam Malone, Cliff Claven), Boston Universities (Harvard, Radcliffe) and key figures from early American history (John Adams, John Hancock and Andrew Jackson).

The Atlanta Braves makes reference to famous DJs like Sasha and Digweed. Fred “Crime Dog” McGriff is “D. Crime” and “Neon” Deion Sanders is “D. Neon.”

The Colorado Rockies will instantly be identified by horror film aficionados, with names like George Romero, Roger Corman, Vincent Price, Wes Craven, Alfred Hitchcock, Bela Lugosi and Tom Savini.

There’s even a team dedicated to the great females of past generations, a team for Software Creations itself and Nintendo of America. Good stuff.

THE TEAMS

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Choose from one of 28 Major League teams. 1993 saw the inclusion of two expansion teams: the Colorado Rockies and the Florida Marlins. Please note that today there are 30 teams (Tampa Bay Rays and the Arizona Diamondbacks). Additionally, the Brewers moved to the National League and the Montreal Expos became the Washington Nationals. Some team logos have changed as well.

THE BALLPARKS

All 28 of them!
All 28 of them!

SOME OF MY FAVORITES…

Love the warehouse that looms in the background
Love the warehouse that looms in the background

Ol’ Camden Yards in downtown Baltimore is a beaut. The infamous B&O Warehouse in the backdrop is a classic sight. At eight stories tall and 1,016 feet long it’s been the longest building on the East Coast since it was completed after seven years of construction in 1905. Standing 432 feet from home plate, only one player has managed to hit the warehouse. That man, ironically, was Ken Griffey Jr., who smashed a 445 foot shot while competing in the 1993 Home Run Derby contest.

Ah, baseball historians know what this means!
Ah, baseball historians know what this means!
Honor the man!
Honor the man!

Another Junior, Cal Ripken Jr., made Major League history on September 6, 1995 when he played in his 2,131st consecutive game. It broke the 56 year record held by “Iron Horse” Lou Gehrig. Cal retired having played 2,632 games straight. That’s a record that you can bet will never be touched. Sorry Tony Stark, but Cal is the real Iron Man.

Otherwise, Camden Yards is pretty damn accurate
Otherwise, Camden Yards is pretty damn accurate
HD scoreboards are all the rage now
HD scoreboards are all the rage now
Kauffman Stadium, Kansas City
Kauffman Stadium, Kansas City

Kauffman Stadium is another striking ballpark, most notable for its roaring water fountains in the outfield. How did it fare in 16-bits?

Not shabby at all
Not shabby at all
A little slice of Heaven
A little slice of Heaven

You can’t discuss classic ballparks without bringing up Wrigley Field. Some have even called it a slice of Heaven. One thing’s for sure, it’s a field of dreams and a field for the ages.

As Harry Caray would say, "HOLY COW!"
As Harry Caray would say, “HOLY COW!”
Love the quirky design
Love the quirky design

But just how accurate is it in Ken Griffey Jr.? Do the outfield walls jut in and out as they do in real life?

You bet your ass they do!
You bet your ass they do!
Be careful of that brick wall and door there...
Be careful of that brick wall and door there…

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[I wouldn't bet on that -Ed.]
[I wouldn’t bet on that -Ed.]
Last but not least...
Last but not least…

Fenway Park. The classic CITGO sign behind the Green Monster (the tall wall in left field), the medium wall in center and the short in right. What a timeless design.

Absolutely breathtaking
Absolutely breathtaking
And who could forget the Fisk Foul Pole?
And who could forget the Fisk Foul Pole?
Or Pesky's Pole? At 302 feet just like in real life!
Or Pesky’s Pole?
Who are you, Manny Ramirez?!
Who are you, Manny Ramirez?!
Or perfect for "cheapie" home runs ;)
Or perfect for “cheapie” home runs ;)

RATINGS R US

Players are rated from 1-10 in these categories:

  • BAT: Base hit potential
  • POW: Home run potential
  • SPD: Speed around the base path
  • DEF: How strong his arm is

KenGriff42Ken Griffey Jr., not surprisingly, has the highest ratings of any player in the game. His total of 36 points makes him the only “red” player in the game. The background colors are based on the player’s point total. I love how at a quick glance you can see how good (or bad) a player might be. Now it has to be said that these colors (and ratings) are not the be all end all. Some players simply hit better than others in spite of their supposed ratings! The game has a lot of these quirks and oddities that I will highlight below.

KenGriff43A player with low BAT and/or low POW can still be a legitimate threat. I smacked 24 homers with Queens in a 162 game season and his POW is a measly 3. His BAT is a paltry 4 and yet I finished batting .318 with him. So don’t automatically assume the ratings tell the whole story! POW is far more important than BAT, but most important of all is the stance of the batter oddly enough, as well as the timing of your swings.

So don’t write a batter off simply based on his POW/BAT stats. As a long time Griffey player, and I have easily played over 1,000 games since ’94, I have also noticed the following, when it comes to player ratings:

  • Generally, a POW of 7 or higher means you’re pretty much good for 30+ home runs in a 162 game season. There’s a BIG difference between POW 6 and POW 7.
  • Likewise, there is a BIG difference between SPD 6 and SPD 7. With a speed of 7, your guy is capable of wrecking havoc on the base path, but a guy with speed 6 just doesn’t have that extra gear.

KenGriff44Speaking of speed and power differences, although all ratings are even (i.e. ratings are not based on .5 increments), secretly there appears to be “highs” and “lows.” For example, Tolstoy (Dave Henderson) of Oakland has a POW 7 that definitely lands on the high end of the scale. I know this because the dude is damn deadly. I believe his stance is also conducive to his hitting the long ball. It’s almost like he’s a 7+ and oddly that appears to sometimes be better than an 8- if that makes any sense…

KenGriff44bMeanwhile, Oakland teammate Ernest (Mark McGwire) is an 8 but it’s a weak 8. As I said, I do believe stance factors in as well. McGwire has an awkward stance while “Hendu” has a better home run stance. So even though McGwire is an 8 and Hendu is a 7, Hendu in this game actually tends to hit more home runs. These quirks make this game extra awesome. Only veterans of Griffey will be able to suss out these subtle ticks and differences.

KenGriff45Now let’s compare two exact numbers. Here we have good old George Bell of the White Sox. He was well known for being a hacker. His scouting report read, “He’ll swing at anything.” His POW is 6 but because of his stance he’s actually one of the deadlier 6 POW ratings in the game. He’s easily a 6+ in my book.

 

KenGriff45bAnd here is Iron Horse (Don Mattingly) of the New York Yankees. He’s a 6 in the POW department just like Bell, but his 6 is a 6-. In other words, consider him a 6.0 while Bell is more of a 6.9. It matters and it does make a difference! For what it’s worth, Bell has the better “home run stance” between the two as well… there is definitely something to that!

KenGriff46Speed also has the quirks of the power rating. Broadway (Pat Kelly) of the Yankees is listed as a 7 but I swear there is a noticeable difference with his 7 and other players’ 7. On the bright side, Kelly’s 5 POW is abnormally strong. I managed to belt 30 HR with him in one season before. His stance is underrated and allows him to smash more homers than one may initially assume.

KenGriff46bWeakland (Al Martin) also has a speed of 7. But it’s a high 7. He feels significantly faster than Pat Kelly. Martin is one of my favorite hitters in Griffey. The guy is a hitting machine. While his power 7 may not be on the high end of a Dave Hendu, Martin cranks out singles and doubles like nobody’s business. Plus, his speed is a 7.9. Jack-of-all-trades, that bloody Al Martin.

KenGriff47BAT doesn’t seem to mean much. High BAT but low POW can be a bad combo. POW is so much more important. Your BAT can be low, but if you have a decent POW then you’re a dangerous hitter. Case in point, see Jojo (Mark Carreon) of the Giants. Carreon is BAT 9 and POW 4. I played a season with the G-Men before, and he sucked. That BAT 9 was pretty much useless thanks to the low POW and the awkward batting stance he has. When in doubt, remember this: POW >>> BAT.

KenGriff47bMY MAN! Here’s the man, Harlem (Kevin Maas) of the Yankees. 3 BAT? SO WHAT! That 10 POW is the difference maker. Dude hit .406 for me and crushed 75 homers. He is the game’s best home run hitter by a mile. A legend in the Griffey community. DUDE’S A BEAST. Remember, POW >>> BAT!

 

  • Defense 9 and 10’s have rocket arms. 8 is pretty good and 7 is acceptable. Around 6 is as low as you want to go. There are no low 7’s or high 8’s on defense as there appears to be with POW and speed. You can change player positions. Catcher with DEF 8, but shortstop DEF 6? In real life you obviously can’t switch them, but here you can. It’s cheap but hey, it’s your call.

These little nuances add a layer of depth to the game. It never gets old discovering something new you hadn’t seen before, despite having played it to death already! Like the old baseball saying goes, “You see something new every day at the ballpark.”

KenGriff48Speaking of something new, Gary Sheffield made Major League Baseball history today (note: this review was originally written on September 8, 2008). The 21 year veteran at age 39 hit a Grand Slam in the 2nd inning against Oakland Athletics rookie Gio Gonzalez. That historic blast marked Major League Baseball home run 250,000! Coincidentally, this occurred on the 10th year anniversary (September 8, 1998) of when Mark McGwire hit home run #62, surpassing Roger Maris’ 35+ year mark of 61 in a single season. To honor Sheffield, I fired up a game using the Marlins that same day he belted MLB home run #250,000. Batting the then 24 year old stud third in the lineup, in the 2nd inning who else but Sheffield came to bat with the bases loaded. It’s like the game knew. First pitch Grand Slam in the 2nd inning just like he did in real life! Wow. That actually freaked me out a bit.

Ken Griffey Jr. Baseball... ITS THINKING...
Ken Griffey Jr. Baseball ITS THINKING

COLOR ME BADD

16 total points or less
16 total points or less
17-20
17-20
21-23
21-23
24-26
24-26
27-29
27-29
30-33
30-32
33-35
33-35
36+
36+

I loved running through rosters, seeing which teams had the most hitters who were yellow or better. A couple clubs have five guys yellow or better, but the Chicago Cubs have six: Mark Grace (31), Ryne Sandberg (31), Sammy Sosa (33), Rick Wilkins (28), Derrick May (27) and Willie Wilson (27).

DAMN YOU, CUBS!

KenGriff59KenGriff59b

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ay caramba! Let's move on...
Ay caramba! Let’s move on…
Press X to go back and get this fancy fadeout
Press X to go back and get this fancy fade-out
Now you're playing with SUPER power
Now you’re playing with SUPER power
Oooh...
Oooh…
Ahhhh
… Ahhhh

My go to Yankees lineup:

1. Queens
2. Clipper
3. Mick
4. Bambino
5. Harlem
6. Bronx
7. Thurman
8. Horse
9. Broadway

Queens may appear to have “bad” ratings, but the little bastard (Gerald Williams) can hit. His speed 9 is 9+. I bring him, Harlem and Bronx off the bench to be my starters. My 3-4-5-6-7 hitters are POWER 7 or higher!

BATTING AND HITTING

Individual game within a team game. Gotta love it
Individual game within a team game. Gotta love it

It’s easy to make contact as pitches go slow, medium or fast. They can be curved but they don’t dip. Sorry, no sliders. Purists may scoff but this means games are quick. It usually takes 12 to 15 minutes to finish a game. Griffey places more emphasis on arcade-like action than it does on simulation, but don’t mistake this for MLB JAM… it plays realistically but with heavy arcade overtones. It strikes a near-perfect balance.

A game of precision and skill
A game of precision and skill

ProTip: you can pull the ball based on when you hit the ball and on which part of the bat. A hit in the center will likely take the ball to the middle part of the field. The more you get the timing down with where you wish to place the ball, the more fun it becomes. Looking for the opposite field hit or just to move the runner from 2nd to 3rd with a right-handed batter? Then you’ll want to swing late, just as you would in real life. So while you can only miss a swing based on timing, rather than levels of depth (the ball travels in one plane but at varying speeds), the batting interface is not as simple as it may initially appear. Therein lies the beauty of this game!

PITCHING

One bar of FAT is good for about 6.25 pitches
One bar of FAT is good for about 6.25 pitches

KenGriff69KenGriff69bKenGriff69c

 

 

 

Leaving in a pitcher to hang and dry when he’s huffing and puffing is just asking for bad news. His pitches will be slower, harder to curve and easier to hit. Great eye for detail! The longer you leave him in there past expiration, the quicker he puffs!

Not realistic but who cares, it's fun!
Not realistic but who cares, it’s fun!

Griffey defies the laws of gravity as you can change the flight manually of a pitch once it leaves your hand. The higher his control rating, the better he’s able to curve it. It usually tricks CPU opponents into swinging and missing. Also a good way to start some heated arguments with your brother or friend!

KenGriff71KenGriff71b

 

 

 

 

 

KenGriff71cKenGriff71d

 

 

 

 

 

KenGriff71eKenGriff71f

 

 

 

 

 

Straight up filthy!

KenGriff72KenGriff72bKenGriff72c

 

 

 

 

Earning a strikeout the real way is quite rare with CPU opponents. Against a bud it’s a blast mixing up the speed of your pitches to throw them off. The slow pitch seems to get people the most.

KenGriff75KenGriff75bKenGriff75cKenGriff75d

 

 

 

 

 

Don't blame me for your suckage!
Don’t blame me for your suckage!

DEFENSE

Jim Edmonds would be proud
Jim Edmonds would be proud
Miss the dive and you'll never hear the end of it!
Miss the dive and you’ll never hear the end of it!
None, especially with the bases loaded in a tie...
None, especially with the bases loaded in a tie…
Be like the pros
Be like the pros
"Sparky, see if there are any free agent right fielders"
Well that worked out all right…

The best (and most rare) defensive play however is the wall leaping catch. There’s nothing like taking a home run away from the opposition. Of course, this can only be done on short walls like Yankee Stadium for example. Players cannot scale 20 foot walls. So while it may have lots of arcade qualities, it’s done so within a realistic scope.

Torii Hunter is out there somewhere smiling
Torii Hunter is out there somewhere smiling
JUST FOUL  Oh, the anger or joy!
JUST FOUL. Oh, the anger or joy!
Even better when you have fast runners on base
Even better when you have fast runners on base
I love the *CLUNK* sound it makes!
I love the *CLUNK* sound it makes!
Steve Bartman rolling over in his grave...
Steve Bartman rolling over in his grave…
One of the many silly quirks to love about this game
One of the many odd quirks I love about this game
Double play is smooth as silk
Double play is smooth as silk

KenGriff89KenGriff89b

 

 

 

 

 

Nothing like an inning ending bang bang double play to lift team morale.

Close plays at the plate can determine the game
Close plays at the plate can determine the game
Ray Fosse having nightmares somewhere
Ray Fosse having nightmares somewhere

KenGriff92KenGriff92b

 

 

 

 

Tagging out base runners is amusing as hell. The runner collapses like he was shot. I love the sound effect of the collision. Whenever and wherever I can, I like to tag them out… ;)

Talk about a photo finish. ... Sorry
Talk about a photo finish! … Sorry
"Oh quit yer bitching!"
“Oh quit yer bitching!”
About the only thing missing are the mascots!
About the only thing missing are the mascots!

KenGriff96KenGriff96b

 

 

 

 

 

KenGriff96cKenGriff96d

 

 

 

 

 

Following each game you get a box score. I wish doubles and triples were specified, but that’s just me nitpicking. It’s cool how the box score looks and reads like your local newspaper sports page. The upper right hand corner offers some entertaining random comments. One of them makes a reference to the Game Boy… something like “Star outfielder caught playing the Game Boy in-between innings!”  :)

And on that note, it's time to move on
And on that note, it’s time to move on

CELEBRATION TIME, COME ON!

The Eager Grasshopper
The Eager Grasshopper
The Statue of Liberty
The Statue of Liberty
The Stroll
The Stroll
The Swag
The Swag

Home run celebrations are a hoot.

COMPUTER AI… AI = ACTUAL IDIOTS??

Don't tell the computer that...
Don’t tell the computer that…

KenGriff103KenGriff103b

 

 

 

 

 

KenGriff103cKenGriff103d

 

 

 

 

 

Computer AI throws it to second base anyway, when the only play was at first. So instead of one out and a runner on second, there are NO outs and runners on second and first. Huge difference. If you play with auto fielding turned on, these are blunders you’ll endure. It’s a gameplay flaw but a small one I’m willing to overlook. Especially since it doesn’t come into play with two human players both on manual defense.

KenGriff104KenGriff104b

 

 

 

 

 

KenGriff104cKenGriff104d

 

 

 

 

 

Another example of bad AI: when the bases are loaded with less than two outs, the computer is adamant on throwing the ball home. Even when the easy play is second to first for the inning ending double play, nope, they’ll always chuck it home. Often times this leads to cheap runs and everyone called safe, as seen here. Talk about stat padding!

Tag third base then throw to first, playa!
Tag third base then throw to first, playa!
D'oh...
D’oh…

CHEAP TRICKS

This is either a free run or a free hit...
This is either a free run or a free hit…
It's imperative that you stay a step off third base
It’s imperative that you stay a step off third base
Computer AI exploitation at its best... or worst!
Computer AI exploitation at its best… or worst!
Er, imagine runners on second and third here
Er, imagine runners on second and third here
Again, staying ONE step off third base is the key here
Again, staying ONE step off third base is the key
Right as the catcher receives the ball
Right as the catcher receives the ball
Remember, there's no crying in baseball!
Remember, there’s no crying in baseball!

NEW YORK YANKEES SEASON STATS

Colossus of Clout, Sultan of Swat, the GREAT BAMBINO!
Colossus of Clout, Sultan of Swat, the Great Bambino!

In the summer of 2008, I played my 7th full 162 game season with Griffey. Once again I used the Yankees. Babe Ruth isn’t in the game, but Harlem might be just as good. One season I hit a career high 80 home runs with Harlem. My goal going into this season was to have five guys finish with at least 100 RBIs each. In addition to winning as many games as I could and setting all kinds of career highs. Let’s check out the stats!

THE PITCHERS

KenGriff115

Whitey (Jimmy Key) was my ace. He went an unprecedented 36-0! If you count the postseason, 40-0! He also had a team-high 87 strikeouts (not counting relievers) to go along with NINE shutouts. His 1.32 ERA was good for second place among starting pitchers and he logged over 310 innings.

KenGriff116

Pfeifle (Jim Abbott) was my #2 guy, Jimmy Key’s “right hand man” if you will [See you in hell -Ed.]. Abbott, as you may know, played with only one hand. He threw a no hitter on September 4, 1993 (in real life). He pitched very well for me, posting a 31-3 record with a 1.73 ERA and had 8 shutouts. In one game he pitched 18 (!) innings, the equivalent of two full games!

KenGriff117

Snake (Melido Perez) was my #3 and a damn fine one, too. 32-1 with a 1.70 ERA. His first start of the season saw him giving up 7 runs but after that he was pretty much lights out. Chalk it up to opening night jitters!

KenGriff118

Big Soho (Bob Wickman) did the unthinkable: pitching with a sub-1 (!!) ERA all season long. Thanks in no small part to him throwing two ONE HIT games. So close to the perfect game! Bob Wickman was a big guy in real life, and it’s nice to see Griffey didn’t cut any corners, or fat *rimshot*

KenGriff119

State (Scott Kamieniecki) finished 24-1 with a 1.91 ERA, proving he is indeed one of the game’s best fifth starting pitchers. With a FAT of only 5, State was able to throw just one complete game (a shutout no less). He’s good for about 6, maybe 7 innings before huffing like a you-know-what. A reliable back end of the rotation guy.

KenGriff120

My closer was Island (Jeff Johnson), not Steve Farr or Lee Smith who owns a career 478 saves! Nope, Island was my man. With a speed rating of 5 and control of 10, that meant he was a strikeout machine. He was good for 52 saves and an eye-popping 0.37 ERA! He appeared in 66 games, pitched 95 innings and struck out the competition 241 times! His FAT 3 allowed me to use him for up to 3 innings if needed. What a tremendous asset!

STARTING PITCHER SUMMARY

GS = Games Started
W = Wins
L = Losses
ERA = Earn Run Average
IP = Innings Pitched
H = Hits allowed
R = Runs allowed
K = Strikeouts
SO = Shutout
CG = Complete Game
Team AVG = Team Average

Bold stats indicate best performance in that category for the entire starting rotation.

KenGriffStats1

I’ve never gone undefeated with a starting pitcher in a single season until Whitey’s 36-0 mark. He had a remarkable year, as did Soho, who only gave up 26 runs all year long, en route to a mind-blowing 0.92 ERA! State has always been one of my favorite #5 starters, and once again he had a superb season for me. Island had 52 saves, just five short of tying real life single season saves leader Bobby Thigpen, who had 57 saves in 1990. Island boosted a 0.37 ERA and 241 strikeouts. Overall, my starting pitchers had an average of 30 wins and a 1.52 ERA.

THE HITTERS

KenGriff121

Queens (Gerald Williams) was my leadoff man. His 9 is a 9+. So many infield singles with that guy. He has good pop in his bat as well, evident by his 24 home runs. He had eight leadoff home runs — Rickey Henderson would be proud.

KenGriff122

Clipper (Bernie Williams), though not a spectacular player, is solid and steady with above average all-around play. 27 homers is a career high for him. The switch hitter is a monster from the right side. Don’t let that power 5 fool ya, and he’s got a good arm to boot!

KenGriff123

Mick (Paul O’Neill) is a beast. With the second highest batting average on the team (.395), a cannon of an arm and a 5+ in speed, he is the perfect player to put in that 3 spot. His power 7 is weaker than some other 7’s but he’s always good for 30-35 jacks and 100-105 RBIs each season. Just made 100 this year, sweet!

KenGriff124

Bambino (Danny Tartabull) had another strong season for me. My cleanup hitter did just that. He’s third on the team in batting average and second in home runs and RBIs. That power 9 is 9+ folks, believe that! Named after Babe Ruth himself, you know he’s gotta be pretty damn good. And he is!

KenGriff125

Harlem! ‘Nuff said. Kevin Maas is one of the best hitters in the game. Griffey has an odd glitch where the guy with the most homers at the All-Star break has his number reset. I was at 42 HR at the break and finished the second half with 33. 75 bombs. He led the team with a .406 average and a whopping 184 RBIs. Harlem is a gawd damn legend.

KenGriff126

Bronx (Matt Nokes) is another bench gem turned starter. That power 7 is 7+ for sure. With Bambino and Harlem snatching up all the RBIs right in front of him, it’s amazing he was still able to knock in 112 himself. In the three seasons I have played with the Yankees, Nokes is always good for 40-45 homers and 110-120 RBIs. What a weapon to have at the sixth slot!

KenGriff127

Thurman (Mike Stanley) has never been able to reach 100 RBIs, with Mick, Bambino, Harlem and Bronx stealing the majority of them. Finally, I did it: 100 RBIs even with Stanley! FIVE guys straight who have 100 or more — WOW! To have him hitting in the bottom third of the lineup shows you how strong the Yankees are. His 100th RBI came on the last day… what a way to cut it close!

KenGriff128

I’ve not been able to hit 20 home runs with Horse (Don Mattingly). Had two seasons of 19. Finally, 20! It came during the last week of the season no less. Perfect example of BAT 9 POW 6 being good but not great stats. BAT 6 POW 9 however? That’s a true difference maker. Power is so much more important than Bat. Congrats Mattingly on finally hitting the big 2-0… it’s about damn time!

KenGriff129

I had a career season with Broadway (Pat Kelly). He’s always been good for 20-25 home runs, so that power 5 is 5+ no doubt, but 30 home runs? The power came from out of nowhere. His speed 7 however is one of the worst speed 7’s in the game. Still, 71 RBIs to boot, what a season for him. With him hitting 30, I had SIX guys who had 30 or more home runs. Bravo, Broadway!

HITTING STATS

BA = Batting Average
HR = Home Run
RBI = Runs Batted In
MH = Number of multi-hit games
3H = Number of 3-hit games
4H = Number of 4-hit games
5H = Number of 5-hit games
MHR = Multi-Home Run games
GS = Grand Slams

Team Total = Team Total
Team AVG = Team Average
Team APG = Team Average Per Game

Not all categories are applicable to the above three.

Bold indicates a team high.

KenGriffStats

Another hi-octane season with the Yankees. I averaged 5.5 runs per game, 13.2 hits per game and 2.1 home runs per game. Five guys had 100+ RBIs. Six guys had 30+ home runs. All nine players had at least 20 home runs. Team batting average was a staggering .349, with each player averaging nearly 38 homers and 100 RBIs. What a season! I love this team, and I love this lineup.

OTHER RANDOM STATS + POSTSEASON PLAY

These are how many times the ballplayers hit back-to-back jacks:

-Queens/Clipper: 0
-Clipper/Mick: 1
-Mick/Bambino: 5
-Bambino/Harlem: 6
-Harlem/Bronx: 4
-Bronx/Thurman: 3
-Thurman/Horse: 2
-Horse/Broadway: 2
-Broadway/Queens: 1

A total of 24 times, and every possible combination sans one.

  • In Game 122 of the season, I had my one and only back-to-back-to-back moment. It came against the Rangers’ ace Mix (Kevin Brown). Mick-Bambino-Harlem. Home runs number 21, 45 and 60 respectively. Interestingly enough, that was also the game where Harlem hit 3 home runs in one game — the only time this season I’ve been able to do that. He had homers 60, 61 and 62 that day. Sorry, Roger Maris!
  • Inside the Park homers… I only had four all season long. One with Thurman, Harlem and two with Queens. Harlem and Queens each had one in the same game versus who else but Boston (their outfielders have terrible arms).
  • Longest game of the season went 20 innings. I was at home against the Orioles. Horse (Don Mattingly) sent the crowd home happy with a walk-off home run.
  • Longest win streak was 44 games… undefeated from August 25 to October 20.
  • I had two triple plays during the season: one in Oakland, the other against the White Sox.
  • Computer starting pitchers are automatically yanked after giving up 5 runs. My personal best was booting a pitcher after just SIX pitches! I’ve done 8 and 9 a bunch of times, but never six
  • Harlem had three games where he drove in 7 runs, and one game with 9! In 4 games he had 30 RBIs. Man’s a freakin’ beast. It took me 39 games to get him to 50 RBIs. Unfortunately, at the All-Star break Harlem was at 99. Ironically, first game back, first at-bat no less, solo home run for RBI #100. I think Harlem was pissed that he missed the mark prior to the break because over the next 10 games he had 20 RBIs!
  • In postseason play I went 11-1. In 12 games I scored 102 runs and had 99 hits, 32 of which left the park.(Hits / Home Runs / RBI)1. Queens:   26 / 1 / 4
    2. Clipper:   24 / 2 / 5
    3. Mick:   28 / 2 / 15
    4. Bambino:   23 / 9! / 29!
    5. Harlem:   24 / 5 / 16
    6. Bronx:   22 / 3 / 8
    7. Thurman:   30 / 5 / 11
    8. Horse:   19 / 3 / 9
    9. Broadway:   13 / 2 / 5

Combing his regular season and postseason, Harlem had 300 hits, 80 HRs and 200 RBIs!

  • As usual (with this being my third 162 game season with the Yankees), Bambino went absolutely nuts in the playoffs. It has happened three seasons in a row now, where once the calendar hits October, Bambino and Harlem switch roles. Harlem had a nice postseason, but Bambino is Mr. October. He had two 7-RBI games and cranked out an amazing 9 homers in just 12 games (3 home runs in one game). 29 RBIs in 12 games!
  • Only my World Series opponent, the St. Louis Cardinals, were able to pull one over me. Overall, I outscored my opponents 102 runs to 32… a whoppin’ 70 run differential.
  • Harlem (Kevin Maas) was the only player to hit for the cycle this season.

EVEN MORE CRAZY STATS

My first 30-hit game of the season. HUGE 9th inning!
My first 30-hit game of the season. Huge 9th inning!
Harlem went deep twice, had 5 hits and 7 RBIs!
Harlem went deep twice, had 5 hits and 7 RBIs!
Must hit eight team home runs in one game...
Must hit eight team home runs in one game…

I’ve hit six home runs in a game before, but never seven until now! Queens and Mick both went deep twice, and everyone had at least one hit and one run scored. Talk about an offensive explosion!

Harlem does a hat trick with a career high 9 RBIs!
Harlem does a hat trick with a career high 9 RBIs!
BEST.GAME.EVER!
BEST.GAME.EVER!
It was the game of my life...
It was the game of my life…

Game 2 of the ALDS. 30 runs, 40 hits. A career high for me in both categories, this game was once in a lifetime. I thought the 7th inning with 8 runs scored was huge but the very next inning I went off for 15 runs, FIFTEEN! In that record setting 8th inning I cranked out 15 hits, 12 of which came consecutively. First pitch after first pitch I nailed single after single, double after double, BANG BANG BANG. It was the most incredible moment I’ve ever experienced with a video game. 12 straight hits, 15 total hits in the inning, 15 runs! That virtually never happens. Bambino belted a Grand Slam in that inning and Bronx and Thurman went back-to-back. I was laughing like a crazed ’70s Japanese mad scientist after about the 7th straight hit. I mean, the hits just kept coming, literally! Coincidentally, my brother happened to walk by and witness pretty much all of it. He kept saying “WHAT THE!” and “HOLY SHIT” after each hit which made the whole spectacle even funnier.

Insanity
Insanity

Bronx cranked out a career high SIX hits. Eight players had FOUR or more hits, everyone had at least two RBIs and eight players scored at least THREE runs. Bambino had a career high 7 RBIs. Five guys with 5+ hits. Talk about one for the ages.

Total domination
Total domination

My Yankees finished the season an incredible 154-8, posting a winning percentage of 95%. I only lost back to back games once. Opened the season winning the first 27. Had a 33 game win streak June 10-July 16, another one July 19-August 23 and a career high 44 game win streak August 25-October 20. Boston was 64-98, 90 games back! Ridiculous.

"WEEEE AAARREE THE CHAAAAMPIONS..."
“WEEEE ARRRE THE CHAAAAMPIONS…”

THE EVER ELUSIVE PERFECT GAME

The man born with no right hand
The man born with no right hand

I’ve played well over 1,000 Griffey games and only once have I been able to throw a perfect game. Came close a few times to throwing my second — Bob Wickman had two 1-hit complete games. My one and only perfect game came back in ’96. I was so proud, thinking to myself I’d have another one down the road. Over 20 years later and nope. I might never do it again.

The man I did it with. No wait, that came out wrong
The man I did it with. Er, that came out wrong…
The unlikeliest candidate to pitch a perfect game with
The unlikeliest candidate to pitch a perfect game!

WHAT THE CRITICS SAID

Iconic
Iconic

EGM gave it ratings of 6, 6, 7, 7, 7. GameFan rated it 84%. Although it received less than staggering scores, ask any serious SNES fan what the best baseball games are on the system and more likely than not people will cite the first Ken Griffey Jr. game. It’s one of those games that didn’t get a whole lot of love at the time of release from the “professional critics,” but the fans adored it from day one. It was in Nintendo Power’s Top 10 for almost a year, ranking in the top three for its first several months holding its own against the likes of The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, NBA Jam and Super Metroid. The game is still beloved by many SNES fans to this day.

CLOSING THOUGHTS

So many good memories!
So many good memories!

I was at a BBQ party with my cousins on a lazy Sunday afternoon in 1996 when my dad told me and my brother those ten magical words every kid hopes to hear: “Let’s go to Toys R Us and buy that game.” I had called them earlier that morning and Griffey was marked down to $29.99. We left the party early to claim the game we had wanted for two years. My bro and I played the game like it was crack. Our friends were into it as well. I fondly remember our out-of-town friend Ben driving down to our place that same year and the three of us spending the whole night playing Griffey against one another. Ben was around 20 at the time, my brother was 15 and I was 13. We weren’t exactly little kids at that point but that night we played Griffey with the wide-eyed innocence and exuberance of six year old children. It was beautiful.

Griffey scores the game winning run 95 ALDS)
Griffey scores the winning run (’95 ALDS)

The graphics are large and arcade-like. There’s great attention to detail, from the team’s name on the uniform to the nicely replicated ballparks to even the chalk line in the batter’s box disappearing after six innings. The players look good and animate well. During the game the same theme loops which may annoy some folks but I think it’s pretty damn catchy myself. Steve Palermo’s digitized voice adds a cordial touch to the proceedings. Each game opens with an abbreviated version of the Star-Spangled Banner. During the 7th inning stretch, an abbreviated version of “Take Me Out to the Ball Game” plays. When a team starts a rally, various rally-like themes play to add to the atmosphere. Of course you get the choice to cut them off, but they’re nicely executed.

Its The Kid
Greatest feeling in sports is a clutch win

The gameplay is the best part. It’s largely an arcade-like experience, but with enough simulation where it’s not outlandish like a Super Baseball 2020, nor serious like a Tecmo Super Baseball — both of which are solid to very good baseball titles in their own right. But Griffey combines the perfect combination of arcade and simulation in my book. Sure, hardcore purists may be disappointed in the lack of pitches available, a lack of overly comprehensive stat-tracking and what have you, but it’s a small gripe. Ultimately, it boils down to how fun a game is, and for me, baseball games simply don’t get much more fun than this.

Graphics: 8.5
Sound: 8.5
Gameplay: 10
Longevity: 10

Overall: 10
PLATINUM AWARD

Award6

Ken Griffey Jr. Presents Major League Baseball is arguably the best baseball game on the Super Nintendo and even possibly of all time. From the optimism of Opening Day to the dog days of summer to the Fall Classic, baseball doesn’t get any better than this!

KenGriff162

BONUS MATERIAL (UNCENSORED)

"Folks, what a gorgeous day it is at the ol ballpark!"
“Folks, what a gorgeous day it is at Yankee Stadium!”
*SOMEWHERE HIGH UP IN THE STANDS*
*SOMEWHERE HIGH UP IN THE STANDS*

KenGriff147

“Easy now Ray you know we ain’t twenty five thirty five year old no mo’!”

“Ah shaddup Claude. You know this still in don’t cha. Ol’ Ray still hip, yes he is, ol’ Ray still hip!”

“More like old Ray’s gunna need a new hip!”

“More like Claude betta SHUT THE HELL UP!

KenGriff148

“Haha, fifty years and we still goin’ at it. Look at you Ray. Old dried up, crusty, nasty-ass looking fuck!”

“That’s where you wrong. Coz I got plenty left in the ol’ tank. Today, Yankee Stadium. Tomorrow, Ray’s BOOM BOOM ROOM!

“Man you been talkin’ that up for fifty years, and it’s as real as Bigfoot, Ray!”

KenGriff149

“Nuff ’bout me, let’s talk about you.”

“Alright, wha’cha wanna talk ’bout, Ray?”

“The plan.”

“Plan? What plan Ray?!”

“The one you got brewing.”

“I ain’t brewing SHIT Ray! I ain’t got no plan!”

“Yes you do, I know it, I KNOW IT!”

KenGriff150

“Listen here Ray. You gawd damn lost your mind Ray!”

“MMMM hmm. I know you got a plan and I don’t care what you say, coz I know you better than that, you sly little motherfucka you.”

MOTHER WHAT! Ray don’t make me slap the hell outta ya now. For the last time, I ain’t got no plan Ray. We out Ray, we OUT!”

KenGriff151

“OH we out, yeah we OUT. That all ya gotta say?”

“Don’t talk to me Ray.”

“OUT MY ASS!”

“Quit talkin’ Ray!”

“I’m just gunna sit here, look at your old black ass and wonder… what you got up that sleeve of yours, coz I know you got something up that sleeve.”

KenGriff152

“You something else all right, Ray… you some hing else… and it’s NO DAMN GOOD.”

“Wait wait shut up. That Harlem guy is up. He all over the radio! They say he’s the next Babe Ruth. One more home run and he will be the new king. Whoever catches that ball I’ll kill him for the money!”

"OH SHIT RAY THE BALL IS COMING YOUR WAY, RAY!"
“OH SHIT RAY THE BALL IS COMING YOUR WAY, RAY!”
*CLUNK*
*CLUNK*

KenGriff155

“AW RAY! THE FUCK WRONG WIT YOU!?!”

“The fuck wrong wit me, the fuck wrong wit you!”

“You just dropped the ball that would have set us for life, RAY!”

“See now if you just told me your plan, all of this could have been avoided!”

“FUCK YOU RAY!”

Another
See you at the ballpark!